tfln

[drunktexting]

the drill, you know it

Comments

[nothingbrave]

I guess it's fitting that drink sounds like it stays with you a few weeks after you've had it, then.

[helpline]

Not unless you'd want to.

[vergeofgreatness]

If you are looking for a stronger reaction, Senator, believe me you will not be disappointed.

[peepeepants]

I talk about women and you turn the conversation to sandwiches and fucking metaphors is how I got that.
Hot dogs are basically dick sandwiches.

[kingfuckboy]

I don't need or want sympathy.

So maybe just leave me alone so I can figure my own self out.

[shittywizard]

No thanks, I get way more than enough of that at home.

[nothingbrave]

Next time you get everyone to agree to go! They don't listen to me.

Kang Cheol | W

[huisaengja]

1. Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
2. Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
3. May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
4. Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)

[crownless_king]

No, it's a mushroom. The psychedelic kind.

WOW, okay, I'm never masturbating to you again. Jesus Christ, that sounds like fucking a cheese grater/blender combo!

Oh Sungmin | Original

[humnam]

1. Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
2. Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
3. It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
4. In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME

[youcouldbeagod]

Well, he can't cause you any more grief if he's dead, can he? What more is there to say?

Although, I suppose you could always look into something more...creative.

5

[reuknighted]

I dunno what's more concerning: the fact that you want me to come to your birthday party, or the fact that you actually have to promise that.

[musicinmotion]

You're free to mess up your life however you want.

Just stop dragging over people into your messes.

[oldmamabear]

Certainly sounds like a fine start. I would prefer some variety however.

[persistentdawn]

Well, I mean, that's different. Mostly because you go WAY too far. But this guy just...GOD. Appease my boobs, don't sob story at them!

[dorkvader]

I prefer: will of The Force.

[kingfuckboy]

Stop acting like this was some malicious plan.

[rebelspy]

Are you?

[ That would probably surprise him, too. ]

I mean, that's good. I'm glad also.

[musicinmotion]

I don't think it was malicious.

I just think you need to think before you act because even if you don't care, it's going to hurt others.

[worn_wings]

cause u shouldn't alone and i don't wanna.

ain't about u

[ he's not as worried about being an asshole this time, he'd just rather keep a clean break, here. ]

[callsigned]

I knew you liked her

[notaflashfan]

So when's this flight set to take off?

2

[throwthebird]

I'd check and make sure he hasn't spontaneously grown a vagina.

[wontgraham]

[1/2] point taken. the one outside of the 9th ward, so i guess no one's going to notice anything amiss

yeah i'm sure my "friend" is enjoying this great advice, thanks.

[2/2] i just ended up using my shirt sleeve. kleenex would've been a better idea.

sorry for bothering you.

3

[chums]

Happy birthday, old chap. I'm sure that was quite a story to tell your might-be grandchildren, but your personal tab with me is ever-rising as you continuously refuse to pay me back for what you took from my flat.

Send the funds immediately, or I will be forced to charge you a late fee.