I love crazy!

THE CRACK PAIRING MEME

crack pairing

An unusual relationship of any kind of fandom (i.e. books, television shows, movies, ect.) that is unlikely to happen.

Randomly take two characters… they don’t have to know each other, they don’t have to show ANY signs of a relationship, and hook them together. That is a crack pairing.

We all know them. Fandoms have fostered these little gems of shipping since the early days, and now, they can even be serious contenders in even the most hostile of shipping wars. Maybe they're absolutely ridiculous and only "for the lulz." Perhaps they make perfect sense...if you squint. Whatever the case may be, these so-called "crack" pairings are not canon and they're nowhere near as popular in fandom as the big fanon pairings.

Most of the time.

Of course, it's important to note that a lot of the time in RP, pairings are always crack pairings. Especially crossover ships, which canon purists would deride purely for being impossible. Still, in memes, that's less likely to happen because people either stick with canon ships, fanon ships, or close CR because of the lack of opportunities for development that games offer.

Not here. This meme is for ALL your ridiculousness, all your high school fangirl dreams, and just plain not being sorry for your ships. Think these characters would be cute together? Go for it. That character have adorable icons and that all you know about them? Ship it, by all means. Here, the reasons come after the desire.

RULES
- Comment with your character and preferences. If you want, you can include a one sentence or so blurb about your character. But blank comments are fine.
- Tag to others.
- RNG for prompts. Prompts cannibalized from random memes.

Sweet
1. Can't deny it - you've tried to run from your feelings for so long and you can't do it anymore. It's time that you show the object of your affection exactly how you feel. Hopefully you don't lose everything in the process!
2. First time - it's your first time making love together. Is it awkward? Do you go all out or is it spur of the moment?
3. Accidental - you didn't actually mean to confess or kiss. They overheard you or it was an accidental kiss. Maybe you were just really drunk and let it slip!
4. Close as can be - you just want to make love and you've found a spot where it's just you and your partner, however you want it to be.
5. Happily ever after - somehow, you've made it work and you're both happy together, even if it meant you had to run away together.
6. Appreciation - show appreciation for your lover! With words, a look, or whatever your choice way to display affection is!
7. Cuddling - nothing wrong with a day of cuddling...
8. Vacation - you're on a vacation! Wherever you want to be. Road trip, amusement park, Grand Canyon, etc.
9. Family - you're visiting family! Maybe they find out about your relationship, maybe they already know, or however you want to play it out! Maybe you've got news you're starting a family by getting pregnant, adopting, or even getting a new pet.
10. Acceptance - someone who disapproved of your relationship before suddenly approves. How's that feel to you and your lover?
11. Surprise - you've planned a surprise! What is it?
12. Date - first date, second date, hundredth date, etc. What are you doing for it?
13. Reunited → it's been awhile since you've seen each other and nothing can ruin this moment.
14. Other - is there another scene you'd like to play out? Want to combine something? Do it here!

Angst
1. Conflict - you've just had a fight with your lover over your relationship or how you handle it. Can you find it in yourselves to forgive each other?
2. Cheated - your lover has cheated on you and you need to confront them about their reasons why and if you can work it out.
3. Found out - you've been found out by someone close to you and they're less than thrilled with your relationship.
4. Disgust - though they play along with it, they're secretly disgusted by the relationship they have with you and it finally comes out into the light.
5. Guilt - one of you is feeling guilty over your relationship, knowing it can never be truly normal or more than a secret.
6. Other - is there another scene you'd like to play out? Want to combine something? Do it here!

Comfort
1. Soothing touch - what better way to sooth your lover than to make love to them and show them that no matter what other people say, you're not going anywhere.
2. Fight for you - whoever has found out about your relationship is trying to hurt your lover and you're not going to let them.
3. Won't let you go - you need your lover to realize that you won't let them go, no matter what.
4. Back together - you broke up for a bit, but whatever it is between you two, you can't stay apart.
5. Injured - your lover was injured because of your relationship and it's time to patch them up.
6. Other - is there another scene you'd like to play out? Want to combine something? Do it here!

Twisted
1. Forced - you know your partner isn't interested in you like this, but you keep them going along with the relationship no matter what. Coercion, blackmail, whatever it takes.
2. Won't take no - their lips might say no, but you're not listening.
3. Control - you've given them some kind of potion to get your love interest to love you in return and they have to do whatever you say.
4. Recorded - you're not really interested in this forbidden love affair, but you must do it or you'll face some tough consequences.
5. Insult - you're cornered by those who disapprove of your relationship, hearing how filthy you are.
6. Other - is there another scene you'd like to play out? Want to combine something? Do it here!

Sexy
1. Rough - you want it rough and hard tonight. Bites, scratches, bruises, etc.
2. Toys - you want to try some props tonight... toys or fuzzy handcuffs.
3. Bondage - more extreme. You're tied up, used, forced to orgasm, whatever.
4. Make up - make up sex is the best sex.
5. Public - you're feeling a little wild so why not a blowjob under the tablecloth in a restaurant or sex in the car?
6. Interrupted - oh yes, oh yes, oh--who the hell is that watching us?!
7. Other - is there another scene you'd like to play out? Want to combine something? Do it here!

Ending
1. Left alone - you woke up to your lover trying to slip away in the night because of the strain of the relationship. Do you let them go or try and fight for it?
2. Torn apart - others are keeping you apart after they found out about your relationship, giving you only minimal contact. What do you do?
3. Ending fight - the argument has turned dirty and ends with one of you storming out.
4. Parting ways - both of you have decided to part ways. It's just so much easier.
5. Always love you - though you'll always love each other, maybe it's time the relationship goes back to being strictly platonic. It would be easier... or maybe that's just how one of you feels.
6. Other - is there another scene you'd like to play out? Want to combine something? Do it here!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Asahi's heart absolutely ached at the way Yuri rose from bed; no man should ever be capable of so much cuteness. His movements were slow and methodical and the way he rubbed his eye... it was almost more intimate than sharing a bed in the first place.]

I'm sorry. [He murmured, licking his lip shyly.] I have to get ready, warm-ups start in less than two hours...

...D-Did you sleep well?

[Yuri's hands wandered through the blankets briefly, plucking his glasses out before answering.]

I slept, so I'm counting that as a victory.

[He yawned widely, stretching his arms up over his head then straightening his shirt back out. He would go and jog outside away from others when he no longer had anyone else to keep him occupied but for now, he was content to sit there on the edge of his bed and talk with Asahi.]

They're not worrying about you are they? Maybe you should send someone a message to let them know you're on your way.

I haven't really checked my messages... the other guys know how I am before matches, so I don't think they're worried. But, um, you can still sleep, you know! It's early for your competition still...

[Yuri stood up and stretched again until something popped, then went to find his phone and check the time. He still had time before he actually had to go anywhere, but he still went about getting dressed and packing his costume for the day's program.]

I don't think I'll be able to get back to sleep anyway. Don't worry about it. I'll try and find you before your match, ok?

[Asahi nodded, trying not to watch as Yuri pattered around his room domestically gathering his clothes.]

See you later...? Um, maybe we should trade numbers?

Ah, yeah, good idea.

[Yuri plucked his phone out of one of his pockets to open his contacts, handing it over for Asahi to enter his number. He'd send a text as soon as he got it back so that Asahi would have his as well before they parted ways for the day. He smiled warmly, putting his hands on Asahi's arms and giving him an easy squeeze.]

Ganba, Asahi-san.

[Asahi gently tapped his number into Yuuri's phone, along with his full name, and then shyly passed it back.]

Thank you. A-And you too... Ganbarre, Yuuri-san!

[Tucking his phone back into his pocket, Yuuri looked up with a brighter smile, hoping that he was actually doing well at being motivating. After all, he liked Asahi quite a bit, it would be terrible not to be able to cheer him on. They were in the same nervous boat, after all. Holding the door open to let Asahi through, Yuuri watched until he had gone, before heading out to run. He did feel a good deal better now, so why not get in a little bit of last-minute exercise? He could rest up before his performance later, possibly while watching the volleyball match between Japan and France.

So he ran. And snacked when he passed a machine. Grabbed a drink in passing on his way around the grounds to hand off whenever the match was over. It was tucked into his bag when he made his way back around to the gymnasium in which the games would be held, asking directions along the way.

Jeez, everyone was tall here. He wasn't all that short, himself, but the majority of these players were all head and shoulders above him, not to mention having a lot more muscle mass. Some of them were watching him pass as he found his way into the stands, but for the most part they left him alone. One or two seemed to recognize him, but they lost sight of him ducking around the crowd before they could call him out. The game would be starting soon, he was pretty sure. So he took a seat near the front of the upper seats with his hands on the rail in front of him, watching the currently empty court in front of him.]

[After leaving Yuuri's room, Asahi headed for breakfast with the team - and they immediately asked all kinds of questions about his night, the babe he scored, was it a gymnast, a diver, a really buff weightlifter. Asahi's ears turned red to their very tips and he buried his face in his plate of carbs. He knew they were messing with him, none of them would believe he had slept with someone, much less went on a sweet date with an even sweeter, cute figure skater.

From breakfast they went to training, starting off light while they digested before getting into drills and formation practice. Soon enough, warm up time was up, and Asahi noticed how full the stands were. He couldn't stop himself from scanning them, and his whole body relaxed and he smiled when he saw Yuri. He even offered him a small wave.

The match was grueling from the first moment; Asahi was serving first. He exhaled deeply and threw the ball up, jumped to meet it in the air and sent it flying over the net. It was received, and the match began.

Japan managed to win it in four sets, 50 minutes, and the team was loud in their celebration. Asahi didn't want to stay too long, so he managed to slip away by taking a longer shower, needed because of his long hair anyways.

Then he went to the ice rink.]

[Yuri had stood front and center in his little section of the stands and watched, trying to figure out what was happening before the match began. And just like most people that saw it firsthand for the first time, he was awed to see just how Asahi played, how the other team seemed to scatter when he spiked over the net. The way the team worked together to get around blocks or to throw off the French team surprised him, and he found himself cheering for all of them, rather than just Asahi himself.

When the match was over, he didn't even have time to try and find Asahi before he had to go to the rink for his own warmups. It was a little bit of a trek, but he was able to meet up with a couple of the other skaters and head into the locker rooms to get changed. He hadn't seen the other yet, but he figured that Asahi would make his way there when he had time to. He was called out on his distraction by his closest friend, and he barely had time to hush Phichit before he had to step onto the ice to complete his warmup. His coach was nearby, just watching his every move with a critical eye.

It was during one of the easier step sequences to practice that he looked up to spot Asahi standing out in the middle of the other coaches, skaters, and onlookers. He stood head and shoulders above most of them, so it wasn't that much of a stretch at least. Yuri's face lit up, and he had to catch himself before he collided with a wall when his arc went a little too wide. The timer was nearly out by now, so he headed toward the gate and stepped off onto the padded area of the floor that wouldn't damage his blades.]

Asahi! You were awesome out there today.

[Asahi hated being one of the tallest people in the room, even though he was used to it, being Japanese. He'd expected things to be better when he was abroad, but among the crowd of figure skating fans, he stood out more than a little.

Maybe it wasn't the best idea to come in his Team Japan volleyball jacket, either. He'd forgotten to grab a second sweater on his way to warmups, though, so it was that or freeze.

Speaking of warmups, Asahi scanned the few skaters who were warming up on the rink at that moment; they were all wearing extravagant, beautiful costumes, and he was a little overwhelmed by how easy they made it look. And when he spotted Yuri, he went a little closer [and maybe the jacket was a good thing, since it meant no one questioned him], until they met up rink-side.]

I-I... Thank you. I was going to say it first, you look amazing. How do you feel..?

[Yuri looked quite at home, happy out there on the ice, the top half of his costume hidden under his own Team Japan training jacket. His hands tucked into the pockets as his weight shifted so that he could lean his hip against the wall beside him. His expression was drawn in, kind of tense as he looked down at the toe picks of his skates. He took a moment to ease his glasses' case out of his pocket and slip them on so at least Asahi didn't look a little bit blurry and give him a headache when he was trying to focus.]

Better. Kind of nervous but...well. It's not as bad as it was, at least.

[Yuuri looked younger and softer with his glasses on, while most people looked more mature with glasses - Asahi liked the difference, especially how cute Yuuri looked with such oversized frames. He put his hand on the ledge of the rink's wall, and tilted his head a bit, trying to look shorter and less threatening, more friendly.]

A little bit of nerves are important... I have no idea how some people get through life without any. I think you'll be amazing.

[Asahi didn't have to make himself look less threatening or shorter, Yuri knew better than to expect anything but sweetness out of this guy. It didn't even matter to him what others in attendance would think of the two of them standing there together. Yuri's smile lit up some at the reassurance and he bowed his head, pink across the tops of his cheeks.]

Thank you, Asahi-san. I'm not going just yet, there are a few programs before me because of the random draw. Maybe you can find somewhere to sit?

O-Oh, right! [He said, suddenly remembering that he really supposed to be where the athletes and coaches were waiting. He blushed, too, and took a step back.]

J-Just, um, do your best, Yuri-san.

[Yuri smiled, slightly apologetic, and followed the movement with a step forward, hand lighting on the other's wrist.]

Thanks for coming. Maybe later, after the cameras and stuff clear out, we could go somewhere and eat again. I-It doesn't have to be a date if you don't want! [It feels necessary to add that, after the way things had sort of fallen apart that morning.]

[Asahi freezes a little at the invitation, and he's a bit scared to answer. It's hard to tell what Yuri wants. He mentioned it being a date... does he want it to be one? Asahi knows he's going to have to be honest, so he takes a deep breath.]

I don't mind it being a date. [He says quickly, in a low voice, hoping no one overhears.] I... I would like that.

[The way Yuri lights up, it's almost embarrassingly obvious that that was the response he was hoping for. He turns a wider, warmer smile on Asahi and glances around to check that nobody is actively watching them, then lays a hand over Asahi's and gives it a gentle squeeze. The announcement for the first performance of the day startles him out of his little warm quiet bubble, and he turns back to find Asahi a place to sit in the stands that he could get to from here.]

Go, I'll catch you when I'm done ok? [He waits at the bottom of the steps leading into the seats and waves before he has to be off, looking rather bashful as he was scolded by his coach for lollygagging. Even if he had been flirting he still needed to stretch in the time he had while the Canadian skater was performing. Yuri is quick to agree and head off to do just that.

After the man on the ice scores almost absurdly high for his weirdly egotistical performance, the Italian sister is up, and Yuri is glued to the low wall just outside the ice, watching and eventually applauding politely with the rest. The Kiss and Cry was crowded with the man's friends from the division as well as his coach and sister. Yuri only has his coach there with him for the moment, but he doesn't mind much. After all, he's used to not having more than one or two people there to support him during competitions.

His name is announced, and his Eros performance is underway. He wonders if Asahi hasn't gotten bored by now, and privately decides that he'll try and monopolize all of the man's attention with his performance. He flubs a jump, putting his hand down to keep himself from hitting the ice, but it doesn't seem to affect the way he skates much, except to push him harder into being the most seductive he can be. This is a side that Asahi will never have seen before. Hopefully he'll be surprised.]

[Asahi's heart was already beating hard just from the word "date," but Yuri's smile and the affectionate touch drive his pulse through the roof. It makes him feel like he's back on the court, almost, in the middle of an intense match.

He goes when Yuri bids him goodbye, because he's too tongue tied to say anything else. He sits in the first empty seat he finds and bites his lip to contain his excitement, as reality sets in and he comes to accept the fact that he has a date with a really, really cute figure skater.

And then it's Yuri's turn to skate, and the music is sensual, but outmatched by Yuri's own sensuality, which he absolutely flaunts on the ice. Asahi's mouth is completely dry; is this really the same boy he went to eat ramen with at 3 in the morning?

Asahi winces when Yuri doesn't nail a landing, wondering if that hurts as much as it looks like it does, but he's so impressed by how easily he recovers from the fall, and honestly, he's still caught up with how flirtatious the poses and gestures in his program are. When Yuri is done skating, Asahi is blushing and a little breathless, and he applauds deafeningly with his calloused hands.]

[His wrist aches with it, as it always does when he's forced to catch himself on the fly, but he never makes it obvious either way. He tries to get his breath back at the end of the performance before he heads back off the ice into the kiss-and-cry, where he'll sit and wait for the announcement of his score. He's tired for a personal best, though it's not as high of a score as some of the others. Still, he looks satisfied with the outcome and bumps his shoulder with his coach's and offers him a small smile, which is immediately returned. He doesn't linger long before he heads back to the stands, hoping to either meet Asahi there or else join him in the stands to watch the next performance.]

[The next skater goes up, and Asahi hears that he's from America, but he doesn't really pay attention to what's going on on the ice anymore; his eyes follow Yuri to the kiss and cry, watch as he reacts to his score because honestly, Asahi doesn't know the first thing about skating and so he has no idea if that number is good or bad overall. Yuri seems happy, and not hurt, and his butt is so cute in that black costume, and--

Asahi sees Yuri look up at him and start to head in his direction, and he races down the stairs again to meet him at the bottom of the stands.]

Are you okay? You fell, and... God. You looked amazing! It's a good score, right?

[As much as he likes the next skater personally, his attention is more focused on Asahi. He's still flushed and a little exhausted, but the compliments make him positively beam. He still hasn't put on his glasses yet, so it's better that he's closer to the other for now.]

It was one of my best scores so far this season. Or, well. The same scores as one of my best. That just means I'll have to do better tomorrow.

[He bounces some on the balls of his feet, having changed back into his tennis shoes by then, before he hops up and wraps his arms briefly around the other's shoulders in a quick hug.] Thanks for coming!

[Asahi catches Yuri on instinct; it takes him back to high school, when his team's libero and his secret crush often jumped on him out of the blue, forcing Asahi to catch his weight or else they'd both topple over. Yuri was nothing like Nishinoya, being much more like Asahi himself, but the nostalgia of Asahi's first crush made everything feel a little softer and more intimate anyways.]

Of course. You came to my match. And volleyball isn't nearly as beautiful as this..

[Yuri's forehead nudges up against Asahi's as he's caught and briefly lifted. He grins and stepd back a bit when his feet touch the ground again, his hands resting on Asahi's forearms.]

Beautiful or not, I had a lot of fun watching you.

Not as much fun as I had, I bet...

[He blushes, trying to keep the smile from overwhelming his expression, and he can't help but notice how pretty Yuuri is, how soft and attractive- by comparison, he feels a little like a brute. He has to remind himself that Yuuri sees him differently from how he sees himself. Or maybe he just likes brutes.]

Is there another event today..?

crack pairing

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DW ate my reply aaaaaaaaAAAA

OH NO ;A;

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gently nyooms this on ahead before work

sorry for late

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Asahi/noya is such a cute ship tbh

i thought you didn't haikyuu?