THE PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE NOTES MEME (haven't done this/these in awhile have we?)

[blackswanevent]

Passive aggressive notes. Your character has something to say, someone has wronged them-but where would the fun be in taking swift brutal revenge or actually righting said wrong? No, let us discuss it via notes slipped under doors, taped to offending objects, and angry signs!

The rules are particularly simple.

1. Post your character's passive aggressive note.
2. This note must be conveying something to an intended party.
3. Allow other people to respond-Do it anonymously if you gotta.
4. Laugh like a fucking hyena. Weep because nobody loves you Witness in-character anoncomm. Have fun PROFIT.
5. ROLL IN PROFIT.
Help me climb out of the Passive Aggressive Note Blog hole I've fallen into.

[I cannot find where I found the image if you know, TELL me and I'll go ahead and edit it to include proper credit.]

Comments

[thatsmybreadandbutter]

To whom it may concern:

As metal as it may be, please refrain from hanging animal carcasses in non-refrigerated areas throughout Mordhaus, as the flies are becoming a nuisance. If the band requests the meat be rotting, please hang it outside, out of the reach of the yardwolves.

Anyone caught handling raw meat indoors in a non-refrigerated area will be assigned to de-corpsification duty for the entirety of the next tour.

Charles F. Offdensen

[aimless_arrow]

Dear shower hog,

I don't know if you know this, but water is a necessary thing for everyone. Humans need it to drink and live and we need it to not be smelly monkeys.

Half an hour showers in a dorm is harmful to the environment of our school. It may also be harmful to the safety of your teeth. Hope you understand.

Signed,

The guy with a bat.

[unionjackass]

it would be so very dandy
if you would cease and desist the act of throwing bricks through my windows
if such actions are attempted again
you may very well find yourself, your home, or any other valuable possessions:
burned, missing, existing in the void between worlds

many thanks for your cooperation






- england (arthur)

[pledged_to_me]

Wrong twin, Arthur. Have you tried talking to him recently?

--Brigid

[butwhytho]

To whom it may concern:

This is SPIDER-MAN's flagpole. Everyone else in your crappy knock-off costumes with you wrist shooter things, trying to be Spider-Man, can find your own flagpole.

- Your Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man

[500men]

To Spider-Man:

Please produce the proper paperwork indicating the ownership of this flagpole belongs to you or we will be forced to have it locked and tagged.

- Your Friendly Neighborhood Parking Police.

[1mistress_nomaster]

It's not that I don't appreciate the love letters, they're quite sweet.

But the next time someone writes such abominable poetry to me, I'm throwing them in the tower. I managed better spelling when I was seven, and 'golden' does not rhyme with 'bosom'.

Regards.
Elizabeth R.
Queen of England, Ireland & France, Defender of the Faith, etc, etc

[reactor]

Lizzie -

Golden fucking does rhyme with bosom, okay, it's a slant rhyme or something.
Can't you just appreciate a nice gesture without complaining. I wrote you a goddamn masterpiece there.

xoxoxo
Tony

[imnotsure]

Hey I just met you.

And this is crazy.

But good luck finding your wife's diamond, emerald, and ruby pendant?

I robbed you maybe. c:

[wallets]

Okay, few things here:
1. I don't have a wife.
2. That pendant does have a very specific name, but I'll let it slide this time.


3. Game on.

[secondguessing]

To whom it may concern,

I have noticed an increase in incidence of stains, bent pages, dog-ears, unpleasant smells (including tobacco), and strained spines in of late. I'm not sure who you are or why you keep coming in here, but be aware that nearly all of the books in this shop are older and more valuable than you are. Perhaps you meant to visit the shop next door; their books have fewer words and more (very colorful) pictures. Regardless, I will be listening for the bell more closely in future. Be forewarned.

Most sincerely,
Ezra Fell

[imnotsure]

Good luck hearing the bell when I come to visit.

Also good luck finding your first edition copy of "Alice in Wonderland." You're right books are more valuable in here then people.

Sincerely yours,
The Cat.

[ancailleachglas]

i appreciate that some of you think my new appearance is the funniest thing since the "incident" (of which we shall speak no more), but leaving dog biscuits on my pillow, bouncing balls at me in corridors and playing recorded cat noises at me are all extremely annoying. if this continues to happen i will start using my space powers in retaliation. and i dont think any of us want that. >:(

jade. <3

[toolofdestruction]

'Dear' you-know-who-you-are,

If I ever hear you call myself, or my brothers, a black mage again, you will will not enjoy the experience.

Unless you prefer your armor melted.

Yours oh so truly,
not a lowly footsoldier.

[thorny]

To the person or persons who have been repeatedly removing my bathroom items from the medicine cabinet:

I understand that you're merely attempting to sate your burning desire for a truly challenging scavenger hunt, so I've taken the liberty of scattering your personal belongings throughout the town in an attempt to aid you in this quest.

The first clue is embedded in this very note. The best of luck to you; I'm sincerely hoping for your victory.

- RL

[assistanting]

Hey asshole who spilled coffee on the copy machine down the hall,

That was really nice, the way you thought the copier was a table. I mean, it looks totally like it, right? Sometimes I also like to leave my coffee in completely inappropriate places where it could spill and ruin everyone's work for the rest of the day.

Next time, why don't you try doing that but in the library? I think they'll appreciate it more over there.

[gothamscop]

To whoever put urine in the coffee on 8.2.2012.

I'd just like you to know that all of the coffee pots in the station have been confiscated by internal affairs including the nice new ones given to us by the Dent Act not to mention an investigation has been launched. I don't know who was drunk or what you guys were doing but this is a Police Station not Arkham Asylum.

Sincerely-Officer this-is-why-we-cannot-have nice things. Care of Officer Jesus-Christ-were-you-drunk-or-high-or-what.

[complicatedliar]

It wasn't urine.

Tee-hee,
Your friendly neighborhood mischief patrol

[smilederek]

To whom it may concern,

So my house has been undergoing some structural problems recently. I have (as I'm sure you all know) been working hard to get the repairs underway, and it would be really nice if when the building team gets there it's not a total mess, guys.

I know that what with having to constantly rescue people and prevent them from mauling their friends and family on the full moon and try to avoid being electrocuted by certain people's girlfriend's family members, progress has been delayed a bit, but that doesn't mean it's okay to just mess up someone else's property.

Next time you need to throw someone or jump forward dramatically or emerge from your grave in my house? Do it away from the walls, windows, and floorboards please!

Derek

xx

[Stapled to Door]

[gothamscop]

OCCUPANT.

The following is a notification from your local police department about the numerous complaints of noise, debris, decay, strange sounds and strange behavior on your property. Continuing these actions will likely result in investigation and eviction from the premises. Please refrain from displays of nudity, burying things, throwing things, and miscreant behavior. This is a neighborhood you share with others. Including members of your local police. Consider this notice formal warning before I return with my squad car.

Sincerely Yours,
Your neighborhood watch.

[bettingonyoufiregirl]

Look, I know we're all trying to win here but sabotage is against the rules and it really sets a bad example for the kids. No, I don't care if that's the idea.

I think the biggest thing to pay attention to is how against the rules it is however so those of you who kidnapped District 12's prep team need to return them before I call the Peace Keepers.

I'm a nice guy, and I really don't want to have to deal with them trying to mess our creativity before the interviews do you? No. So fess up. District Two I'm looking in your direction.

-Cinna. District 12 Stylist

[gingergenius]

The wifi network password and name have been changed. Look for "no Dicks allowed". :)

[blackthunder]

To the Osiris Red Dorm,

Just because I said that everyone of you were skilled enough to defeat someone, doesn't mean that I think you're all skilled. It just means that the particular person I was talking to was even more worthless than all of you.



- Jun Manjoume

[huszar]

To the person who ate my pastries,
Just because someone puts something outside doesn't mean it is "free."
The fact that you had to leave the sidewalk, go through the garden, and take them off the plate on the table on my porch should have been a clue!
You probably thought that somehow they looked like they were yours, but the fact that they didn't taste like shit should probably have also been a clue.

I hope you liked them!
Love, Hungary.

[tomate]

[ There is a post-it note put on top of the one Hungary left ]

oh no, they didn't taste all that good! :)

[uglier]

to my favorite crap-mongering, alien tapeworm-infested, alcoholic:

remember when i told you to lay off my family?

lol.

you're so screwed.

so rekindling our broship because you never cease to amaze me with what a massive screw up you really are.

like father, like son.

[butwhytho]

sir did you mean to leave this on a flagpole 34 stories high?

- a concerned citizen for all parties involved

[notthatgirl]

To whomever was responsible,

Let it be known that while I'm more than sure you had nothing but good intentions: There will not be an annual celebration of the melting of the Wicked Witch. Those are dark times that no one wishes to remember or celebrate, nor is it very Good of you to do.

Sincerely yours,
The Good-Officially

[thelasthuman]

DEAR GOOD.

BUT SHE WAS EVIL AND WE ALWAYS NEED AN EXCUSE TO PARTY. SERIOUSLY JUST ASK JAKE.

YOU'RE WELCOME BY THE WAY.

[dualhalo]

To some Jerkface,

If I find whoever decided that pumpkins should be a common food item, I will force you into a life of toilet cleaning. Bleck. You don't know how miserable you've made my life! I swear you'll pay.



Sincerely,
The Amazing/Regal/Bodacious Princess Mint

[bellonaborn]

To whom it may concern Graecus,

I do not appreciate the "decorations" put on Aurum and Argentum, nor will they when they awake to see the flowers drawn on them. Furthermore, whomever dyed Scipio's tail and wings pink? Even though I'm sure he loves the new colors...

I had better not find you any time soon.

-Your worst nightmare

[doesnotsparkle]

To the residents of Apartment C,

I work nights at a hospital. I have been most forgiving for the loudness of you and whomever you choose to have over to your residence. However I know for a fact you are breaking many noise ordinances, if not flat out raping the ears of the other tenants of this building.

I would like to point a few thing's out here. One, 'bitches ain't shit' is not proper grammar, and not something I wish to be woken up by so early in the day. It would be 'Bitches are not shit' for the record. Two, turning your bass all the way up is a good way to greatly upset the people around you.

Lastly. Did you know that bleach and ammonia mixed can kill you if you inhale it in your sleep? Fun fact there, I'm full of those

Knock the fucking noise off or see what else I know.

- The very angry vampire doctor next door.

P.S. Samuel L Jackson sang that song better anyway.

[poorgirlsarcee]

Yo Doc,

Really man chill, it's not like you really need sleep don't they have meds for that?

- Resident's BFF

P.S. Though your right he needs to learn to sing.

Taped everywhere in OOO.

[thelasthuman]

STOP STEALING PRINCESSES ICE KING. YOU SUCK.

[dualhalo]

Who's this guy that's stealing Princesses?

[fatedtosee]

Hey

Whoever thinks it's cute to leave lewd notes or other things over at the Great House? What part of maiden don't you understand? Here's to hoping Apollo goes all sunshine on your ass.

Sincerely,
Delphi's Finest

[lyre_hero]

[There's a post-it note on top of hers:]

Can't very well go all sunshine on my own ass sweetheart. :)

Now, if someone else was being a raging douchecanoe in my house, I'd be more than happy to beat him up, but I suspect you were too dazzled by my charms to notice.

Sincerely,
The Greatest Sun God Who Ever Lived

[sweetredterror]

Spell components are not toys. Even when they're shiny and brightly-colored.

Sincerely,

A very annoyed Witch.

[notthewickedone]

Annoyed witch,

Why bother making them shiny and brightly colored then? Just asking for trouble.

Yours,
A curious Witch