Date Auction Meme

[spammer]

Feeling a bit lonely and got a bit of extra cash in your pocket? Wanna waste an exorbitant amount of money on a date?
Now’s your chance!
We're holding a Bachelor/Bachelorette Auction!




+ Participants can either be auctioned off by themselves or by their friends.
+ Add a starting price.
+ Bidders can be anyone and choose to be anonymous Oh Baker; you can pretend to be anon??
+ Please put the character's name and canon in the header.

Bidding ends at 11:59 PM PST on Saturday, February 20th, bidders may play pretend remain anonymous until the end of the auction. The reward is dinner with whomever they “win” (Or whatever else is agreed to)!

Comments

Theo Raeken | Teen Wolf

[firstchimera]

[I mean... does anyone want this?
Theo actually offered himself up, funnily enough.]

Starting bid: $10

Matt Murdock/Daredevil || MCU || M/F pref

[blind_avocado]

[He is looking slightly uncomfortable as he stands next to a sign, which he probably did not write. And he's also not aware of the crossed out part, but if he was, he would immediately blame Foggy]

Buy a date with the most handsome blind lawyer in Hell's Kitchen!
If you don't, it probably means you hate the handicapped. Just kidding. Unless that makes you want to bid more.
All proceeds go to developing Hell's Kitchen. Especially one struggling law firm.
Starting bid: $25

[mudblood_andproud]

[Hermione is a sucker for good causes. Especially if this particular bid would help others in need]

$100

Flynn Scifo | Tales of Vesperia | OTA

[divine_streak]

[He's looking a little uneasy, but still trying to smile and be charismatic to any potential bidders.]

Win a date with the Commandant of the Imperial Knights.
All proceeds go to Zaphias' Lower Quarter.
Starting bid: 10 gald

[Luckily there are machines and kiosks nearby to help exchange your currency. In my headcanon, one Gald is worth roughly two dollars.]

Impa || Hyrule Warriors || OTA

[water_kunai]

[She's standing with her arms folded across her chest with a fowl gaze in her eye. She was clearly ordered to be here.]

Win a date with the Captain of the Hylian Guard!
Starting bid: 10 rupees

Literally the worst idea but bare with me.

[justhavepower]

. . . 50 rupees.

[To have Zelda's captain for just a few hours... That would be very interesting.]

Peter Quill/Star-Lord || MCU || M/F pref

[12percentplan]

[Now this guy looks happy to be here.]

Win a date with the guy who saved the galaxy. You're welcome.
Starting bid: 10 units

[ouronlyhope]

Must have been a different galaxy.

[But Leia can start with a 50 unit bid]

Soushi Miketsukami | Inu x Boku SS

[inssight]

[This... is not him. But don't worry-- Natsume has this under control. There's absolutely zero reasons to worry for a~n~y reason.

...

As he talks, cute cards illustrate his points-- never mind that they're bunnies. That's clearly Soushi's hair and suit on it. Or that the one with him looks suspiciously like Natsume.

All of which are of course 1000% accurate.]

Ladies and gentleman, please consider for a moment this strapping young gentleman-- you can't do better than a date with Sou-tan.

[Each word brings a new card--]

Polite, caring, romantic, devoted... He's the real deal~ Let's start the bids at $30!

[Oh this is so exciting.]

Zange Natsume | Inu x Boku SS

[discrepant]

[Welp. As much as he shouldn't find any of Natsume's shenanigans surprising nor off putting. It is difficult to find any delight in being showcase like this. Even if it'll help him move on from his previous master.

That's why he'll play along with this game of finding a date. He had a few choice words to give as well.]

Natsume-san, you're too kind to someone as lowly as myself. I greatly appreciate it. [He'll take hold of his hand as he says in his kindest and enticing tone.] Please allow me to show you my deepest gratitude.

[He'll lean a little forward before removing the microphone in Natsume's hand before turning to the audience with the brightest and most inviting smile he could muster.]

Good day, everyone. I am Soushi Miketsukami. It is a pleasure to meet you. [He offers them a low bow before continuing on.] Before you decide to make a decision over who to bid, I would like to be given the honor to introduce my childhood friend whom has so energetically introduce myself to.

Zange Natsume-san is just as kind, caring, and devoted to whoever he considers to be precious in his life. Unlike myself, he will always find a way to bring a smile to your lips, laughter in your heart, and offer you all kinds of wonderful experiences in your life. He may be a terrible kisser, but he is absolutely perfect to have as a wonderful and safe date. Please consider him as your primary choice especially if you're a beginning!

He's worth ten dollars less than myself, making him the more economical choice as well. Thank you.

Gendry | A Song of Ice and Fire/Game of Thrones

[bullamongstags]

[...Why? He's not sure how or why he's here or in this but he is.

Starting bid: two silver stags]

Clark Kent / Kal-El / Superman | Man of Steel

[borntochoose]

[Kal here doesn't look all too happy, but he actually put himself up. All for charity, right? At least he didn't have to write the sign himself.]

The one! The only! Win a date with the actual Superman!
Starting bid: $10

mobiley makes this journal appreciate my dedication to yoh

[hawaiis]

Twenty! Sorry Supes, that's all I have in my wallet.

( :( maybe he will win. )

general hux | star wars

[hux]

[ Didn't put himself up for this, not at all. He doesn't know who did but when he finds them they'll wish they could airlock themselves. Either way, Hux is still going to show up, folds his arms and stick his nose in the air. If he backed out the entire First Order would think he was a coward. Dammit.]

Win a date with the General of the First Order; Hux.
Starting bid: 10 credits.

[notimeforsorrow]

Considering what I now know about the First Order, I bid negative 1 million credits.

In other words, you'd have to pay me to date you. [And not even then. She'd sooner throw you into the Sarlaac pit.]

Poe Dameron | Star Wars

[xwingpoetry]

[Poe didn't actually put himself up for this, believe it or not, but he's pretty sure it's for a good cause. The host introduces him - ]

Win a date with Poe Dameron, the best pilot of the Resistance!
Starting bid: 10 credits.

[And they're off.]

[girlandherstaff]

[Okay, so Rey doesn't have any many credits. Still, it's for a good cause, right?]

Um, 20 credits?

Makino Tsukushi | Hana Yori Dango

[commonweed]

[While she has been made up to look pretty - for whatever value of the word - Makino is wearing a very firm scowl. She cannot believe her parents actually signed her up to this! And the sign. Oh gods, the sign]

Charming, and good girl! Smart and well-mannered! Perfect for taking home to Mother!
Starting bid: 500 Yen

[...Thank you for thinking so much of her, parents]

Rey | Star Wars

[girlandherstaff]

[No, she didn't put herself up. But she has been assured this is all for a very good cause. Which helps. Sort of]

Win a date with a Jedi-in-traning.
Just a date, nothing serious
Staring bid: 10 credits

Rey | Star Wars

[aprettyflyboy]

[Rey darling, how did you ever end in there?]

100 credits. [No, he doesn't do anything by halves.]

alex danvers (supergirl) f/f pref

[notjustanagent]

[How does she actually get herself into these things?

Oh. Right. Bets with Kryptonians.]

Starting bid: $10

I definitely had to

[mostlysunny]

[Bets with Kryptonians who can sometimes—okay, rarely—be crafty. And who have possibly taken it upon themselves—herself—to start a bidding war, because Alex deserves it and it's for charity and definitely not because it's completely her fault Alex is here in the first place.

And so here's Kara, trying to look dignified and aloof and probably failing at both, fidgeting with her glasses before holding up a hand.]

Ten dollars.

[Finger-wave?]

Claudia Donovan | Warehouse 13 | M/F preferred

[strippernameserendipity]

[This is totally Pete's fault. He even made the sign.]

Win a date with the hottest IRS Agent still available!
Starting bid: $50

[pielemental]

Dean looks at the sign and then at Claudia. "One, did you lose a bet and two, will you shoot me if I bid?"

Although it might be worth it.

Diana Prince / Wonder Woman | DC Comics

[bulletsandbracelets]

[Diana doesn't mind doing this sort of thing for charity. True, she does object to the buying and selling of people, but in this situation, it's very clear that consent has been given and that everyone understands it's just for fun, and that the money will go to a good cause. She smiles out at the crowd, because she hope that she can raise something for the charity]

Win a date with the real Wonder Woman!
Starting bid: $10

[lazywater]

[You know what? Just because he can prove to Ryuu that he can get a REAL date with a REAL WOMAN and because it'd be cool to date another superhero...]

Um... 10 dollars is like plus a thousand yen so... hm... $30.

Mettaton Ex || Undertale || OTA

[aghostinthemachine]

[Cue spotlights, music, smoke, and a perfect silhouette. Once the smoke disappates, it's obvious who just made their dramatic entrance. And guess who's narrating his own bidding? This guy.]

BEAUTIES AND GENTLEBEAUTIES~
HERE IS YOUR CHANCE TO WIN A DATE WITH THE FABULOUS, LOVABLE, GORGEOUS, NUMBER ONE STAR OF THE UNDERGROUND: METTATON!

[He turns to face another "camera," pointing dramatically at it.]

What comes with this date, you ask?
Why, if you win the auction, you will also receive: (1) complimentary kiss on the cheek, (1) autographed poster, and (1) Robot Of Love DVD!
Normally a 3000 gold value deal but it can be yours for the starting price of 500 gold!

[The DVD is literally a 4 hour movie of him in his rectangle form just lying on a bed while rose petals rain down on him.]

All proceeds go to the Spider Bake Sale.
"Because when you crave sweets, you crave the goods of the Spider Bake Sale."

aoba seragaki || dramatical murder || m/m for anything shippy

[dramaticalblue]

[ Aoba's looking pretty embarrassed and uncomfortable. He never would've agreed if it hadn't been for a good cause, and now here he is. ]

Starting bid: ¥1000

[questionablybi]

[Don't worry Aoba, he'll save you!]

4500 Yen!

Finn, Ratso or Chow | Jackie Chan Adventures

[stoogesofsanfran]

Like to dance and wish someone would laugh at your stupid jokes? If so, you're in for the night of your life! Deep pockets and a pretty face might even get you a second date.

Starting bid: $10

[This description is entirely Chow's fault and Finn is not amused.]



A sweet guy who'll make you feel like a princess, this date includes a homemade dinner of your choice.

Starting bid: $12.50

[He's not sure how he agreed to this, but...okay.]



Don't let his small size fool you, this is one guy who's full of 'personality.' If you're patient, you might even be able to find the good parts.

Starting bid: $5

[He signed himself up for this, but he did not write that description.]

[littlehart]

[Even if Finn wasn't happy with his description, it did catch Cyprin's eye -- maybe because (true to Chow's own sign) it definitely had personality. They quirked a smile when they got to the last sentence.]

I do like dancing... And I've been known to make stupid jokes. [But is their face pretty enough, that's the question They hold up their little bidding sign.] Thirty dollars.

--Do you happen to know what charity this is going to?

Naoto Shirogane - Persona 4

[shiroganeheir]

[She didn't sign herself up for it, and she looks extremely mad.]

Come bid on Yasogami High's Detective Prince and Miss Yasogami 2011!

Naoto is a feisty one, and is certain to give you an interesting time! Hopefully you're not hiding anything, because she'll certainly find it out.

Bids start at 5000 yen, and all proceeds go to a crime victims' charity.

[beary_nice]

Five hun-

Wait... what happened to five hundred yen?! I don't have Five thousand!

En Yufuin | Cute High Earth Defence Club Love | OTA

[lazywater]

[He's at least standing, that's good, but he isn't happy with Wombat's sign for him.]

Win a date with one of the heirs to the throne of love! The Flashing Prince: Cerulean!

Starting bid: 100 Yen / 80 US cents.

All proceeds will go to protecting earth and ensuring love is spread to all.

Robin | Fire Emblem: Awakening | OTA

[time_to_tip_the_scales]

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! Introducing our latest bachelor, Robin the tactician! This jack of all trades hails from the kingdom of Ylisse, and is packing some serious muscles under that coat of his. He's all yours for the entire night, a night filled with dinner, dancing, and who knows where that may lead! All proceeds will go to the Ylisse reconstruction fund, so remember folks it's for a good cause!

Can we start the bidding at 100 gold, 100$ or 10,000 yen?

[Robin is dragged onto the stage by our masked auctioneers looking rather frazzled and embarrassed by all of this.]

Who in their right mind entered me into this in the first place?

[fetchingfriar]

No idea. Maybe one of our friends who wanted to play a joke.

[Vaike or Nowi or both, he'll bet. ... Might as well try save Robin.]

200 gold.

Ezio Auditore | Assassin's Creed | OTA

[dominus]

[ He smiles sheepishly up there in his trim suit, listening to the list of his (publicly known) qualities as they're rattled off- the wineries in Tuscany, his philanthropy - an even longer rap sheet his announcer hints at - closing out with the announcement that all proceeds will go toward supporting youth art programs. ]

Starting Bid: €50

[filia_terrae]

[Ah, charities. How very droll.

Kuvira could remain anonymous until the end of the auction, but here's the thing: she doesn't particularly care about anonymity. She wants everyone to know just who won this particular auction, so they have someone to focus all their jealousies on.

(Yes, yes, that beard still has to go. But she has to admit, he makes up for that in - other areas.)

And so she stands up, hands at the small of her back before nodding to the aide next to her, who follows suit before writing a sum on a piece of whiteboard and turning it around for display.

€250,000. Beat that, peasants.]

Automan (Otto J. Mann) | Automan tv show | M/F pref

[automan]

[FBI agent. Police consultant. Hologram. Proceeds will go to the New York Police computer department.]

Starting bid: $20

Walter Nebicher | Automan | M/F pref

[createdautoman]

[There's a lot of resistance and flailing by Walter as he's pulled up on stage. Arguing with Automan that he does NOT need help finding a date and certainly not one from an auction but all of that falls on deaf ears. Walter is participating whether he likes it or not. So he'll just stand there selfconsciously and cast a nervous smile around the room.]

[Computer expert. Policeman. All around good guy.]

Starting bid: $10

Poe Dameron

[aprettyflyboy]

[Snap or Jess are more likely the ones to blame for this. Poe will try to play with it for the most part.]

Win a date with the best pilot of the Resistance, Poe dameron!
Starting bid: 15 credits.

[girlandherstaff]

[Snap and Jess, actually. Rey face-palmed at the whole thing. Why are their friends like this?]

25 credits!