Mmm, pie.

[a_pirate_meant_to_be]

THE ORC AND THE PIE MEME



Monte Cook, famed tabletop game designer and writer, once created a scenario so simple, pretty much anybody could pick it up and play it. Put simply: You are in a ten by ten foot room. There is a delicious pie in the room. Said pie is being guarded by an orc. You are hungry. It is your duty to find a way to convince the orc to give you the pie.

Of course, it doesn't HAVE to be a room of those exact proportions, but the basic scenario stands in this meme:

1. You, the poster, are the "orc."
2. Your respondents are the "hungry adventurers."
3. Thread poster: don't let them get the pie. Responders: get that frickin' pie.

I hope you weren't expecting anything more complicated than that.

Comments

Sakuya Izayoi | Touhou Project

[elegant_knives]

[ This freshly made fruit tart is for her mistress and her alone. Sakuya stands in the room with the tart in one hand, and a knife in the other and looking very unfriendly... ]

[ridethe_air]

[The smell of the fresh fruit tart caught the young man's nose. With a sheepish grin Mitchell peeked his head into the kitchen, and offered a little wave before speaking up.]

Hola Señorita! Don't suppose you would be willing to let me try a slice of that tasty looking treat?

[elegant_knives]

[ And Sakuya's reply is a bit... blunt. ]

Absolutely not. Lady Remilia would be quite upset to find a slice missing.

[ridethe_air]

[With a little shrug he considered if for a second before speaking up again.]

Gotcha.

It's just, well how do ya know that your Lady will like it, if the tart hasn't been sampled yet? I mean, as good as it looks and smells, well there's no way to tell for sure without having a just a little bite.

[elegant_knives]

Do you think this is the first time I've made this for her?

[ridethe_air]

Oh I don't doubt that you've made it before, but everyone knows that no recipe ever makes the exact same dish twice. After all the quality of ingredients and stuff varies every time.

Hey but if ya want to risk it, and possibly let your lady down, well I guess that's cool too. Just remember that I was the one trying to lend a hand.

[elegant_knives]

I'm afraid she gets quite annoyed if she notices someone has 'tampered' with it. It's a risk I will have to take.

[ It's not like she minds making a new one. ]

Kylo Ren | Star Wars

[darthvaderfanboy]

[Good luck getting the pie away from this Knight of Ren. Hope it's worth losing a hand over.]

general hux | star wars

[hux]

[You see this pie on the table that Hux is stood by? It's the only pie that came in the quarter yearly shipment. An officer fucked that order up alright, but for now? This red apple pie belongs to Hux and anyone who comes too close will be made very aware of the blaster in the general's hand. And should he feel an ounce of force energy from anyone in that room he will be taking a shot so help him.

Yes, this shit is very serious. Bring it!]

[forcefullyunstable]

There was a disturbance in the force... And a definite shortage of pie.

If the sound of Stormtroopers hurriedly leaving their post didn't announce Ren's appearance, than the man's own angry declaration certainly would. "General, That pie is mine."

[hux]

Hux doesn't need to be a mind reader to understand why the troops that were previously hovering around suddenly start to leave. They can sense the oncoming fight as surely as wildlife senses a storm in the air and they are not hanging around to see the outcome. Hux apparently meant business and the troops know Ren always did.

There's no surprise when the general sees Kylo Ren suddenly nearby and he doesn't even hesitate to raise the blaster and point it directly at the other. It would be a hot day on Hoth before he gave this pie up.

"Walk away, Ren. This is none of your concern."

[forcefullyunstable]

Pointing a blaster at a man who can deflect them with a thought and a gesture is a fool's game, Hux.

"What you think is none of my concern... is all of my pie."