bakerstreet | the realistic college au

the realistic college au meme

comment with your character's name and canon in the subject header. use rng or pick one of the options below for your au scenario.

I. living conditions
01. my roommate’s boyfriend is staying over so can I please sleep on your floor
02. all our friends are drunk
03. we live in halls opposite one another and i keep seeing you change in the window please close your blinds
04. you’re the RA and you’re trying to bust me for having hermit crabs
05. you’re baking cookies in the communal kitchen at 3am and I’m angry but also really hungry
06. clearly we’re both really uncomfortable at this party
07. you peed on my car. you were drunk. I was in the car. there will be hell to pay.
08. my friend dragged me to this party and I just saw my ex quick make out with me
09. sorry my roommate puked on your shoes
10. my roommate borrowed your contraband hotpot and managed to set it on fire

II. chance meeting
01. it’s pouring and my final paper is in my backpack so I guess we’re stuck under this tiny awning together. do you think they’d deliver pizza here
02. waiting outside for pizza to be delivered but both of ours is super late
03. I know I keep coming to this [cookie/coffee/etc.] shop and for some reason it’s always your shift but don’t you dare judge me I need this for my sanity
04. I found your USB drive still in the computer (and potentially regret finding out what's on it)
05. you decked me in the head while you were playing frisbee golf
06. your school mailbox is right next to mine
07. what do you mean we’re under a tornado warning?

III. campus community
01. I’m really passionate about this cause and I will give you this flier if I have to shove it down your throat
02. it’s 3 am and I’m still in the library studying for finals and I’m losing my grip on reality and I think I just saw a ghost
03. we’re the only two people in this club. what is this club even for
04. humans vs zombies, all bets are off, friendships mean nothing
05. I thought I was the only one who liked the waffle station in the cafeteria
06. we’re studying in the library and there are two people very obviously fucking in the stacks and we keep sharing embarrassed glances
07. what are you doing at this table at the career fair
08. I saw you sneaking captain crunch and cutlery out of the dining hall
09. my computer crashed and you’re the student worker at the IT center
10. we’re both on athletic teams that aren’t as cool as the football team and they give us shit
11. you’re part of the guerrilla theater club on campus and crashed my class for a performance

IV. credit hour woes
01. hey I have to [photograph/draw blood/film/insert major here] someone for class, will you be my guinea pig
02. we’re the only people who ever talk in discussions it’s awful
03. group project
04. both of us turned up to the wrong room for this lecture and neither of us know where it's supposed to be
05. we’re both donating blood in the blood donation van in the quad to get out of the same class
06. wait, I actually have a competent lab partner?
07. waiting for office hours
08. we started racing up the three flights of stairs to class for some reason and we can’t stop
09. vicious battle over the only left handed desk in the room

V. limited resources
01. you keep using my preferred shower stall in the floor bathrooms when I’m trying to get ready for class
02. you keep parking in the space outside my student house you absolute asshole
03. you're the only person in the room when i break the printer and i'm panicking (so don't be a dick about it please)
04. neither of us bought the expensive textbook but there is only one copy in the library and it can’t leave the building
05. this awesome professor only has one TA slot and we’re rivals
06. you keep reserving the good study room in the corner of the library with the windows
07. I’ve been sitting in this seat all semester why did you decide to sit in it today
08. you’re REALLY GOOD at using the right search terms for the academic databases and I’m on a deadline
09. we’re always at the fitness center at the same time and end up competing on the treadmill
10. can I borrow a dryer sheet? I ran out and the ones in the vending machine give me a rash

scenarios taken from this post on tumblr.
originally posted here.

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No.

[Guess what that is.]

I'm exceptionally clingy. And possessive. This was an exception, so remember that.

Clingy. And possessive. ... of godawful nicknames?

[ Because what. What is this. His face is going to get stuck in the little hedgehog frown thing. ]

There's got to be more to life, buddy. Please drink up and go find something that speaks to you.

I found you. And I didn't even have to drink.

[so guess what he's going to be clingy and possessive about now.]

[ It honestly does not compute. Petre is like some kind of nudity-loving alien to him, who says weird things. Nate doesn't even know how to take him seriously. ]

Well, I'm speaking to you at the moment, but I'm really unsure about the future.

[ Excuse him, he's just going to ignore the drinking comment and pour himself a glass. ]

[This is basically permission, right. Walk in to my life and do whatever you want, strange creature. Signed below with a heart on the i.]

Well, make it good for me.

[The drink. The talk. The moment and the future.]

[ He had no idea, and still doesn't. Well, maybe he sort of did, what with the instinct to shut the door in Petre's face earlier, but he's spent most of his life ignoring his instincts. ]

Not sure I know what that'd entail. [ "You weirdo," he doesn't add. In the spirit of humoring his strange visitor: ] So, recreational nudity. You're a big fan.

It's only natural.

[He gives continuation to the conversation without a hitch, inching up his shoulders again. There's a lot of shrugging right now.]

No one telling me what to do in my own house. You should try it, it's fun.

"It" like being naked, or "it" as in a general reign of tyranny against my housemates?

[ He already tried to smoke out of the window, and look what that got him. Also, now that he's met Petre, he quite uncharitably thinks that he might as well have said nothing and learned to enjoy voyeurism. ]

Both!

[Obviously!]

Unless they actually want you to go naked in the house. Not sure what to tell you about your roommates then.

[ All right, he smiles. Against his will, also known as almost every smile not given while trying to appear normal. ]

Your roommates don't care?

They did, actually. Which is why I scared them all off. Being a douche pays off, my friend.

Does it also pay your rent?

[ Nate has totally forgotten about his drink and is just holding it, caught up in something like the beginning of horrified fascination. ]

No, fucking the right people does.

[does that mean he's a prostitute or just a massive ho. MYSTERIES EVERYWHERE.]

[ A mystery Nate is ill-equipped to solve. He has almost no visible reaction other than blankness for about 1.5 seconds, and then: ]

Oh. [ Hello drink, he has remembered you. ] Glad that. Works out for you.

Oh, now you're judging me.

[because he totally wasn't before.]

Not for that.

[ But hilariously, Nate actually seems worried Petre might think so, because he's still operating under normal people rules. ]

What was I supposed to say? Neato, tell me all about it?

You're never supposed to do something around me, Nate.

[That sounds like a promise.]

[ Confusing, and sort of ominous, though he can't explain why. ]

Okay. Good? [ He has no way of parsing that correctly. ] Thanks? You almost done? I have classes.

[ Which he'll go to after drinking in the middle of the day with the guy next door, no big deal. ]

Oh, right. You're supposed to go to those, aren't you.

[wow who's judging whom now. Because following what Petre says will get you really far in life.]

What're you studying.

[ Judgmental people don't get to finish their drinks, or at least, Nate will try taking the glass from him in an attempt to get him out of the house. Petre is An Experience and he's starting to feel inexplicably worried. ]

History of underwater basket weaving. Competitive field. Need to study a lot.

[Well, he's laughing. Bye bye drink.]

Did you come up with that on the spot? Or is it just something you've rehearsed in front of the mirror.

It's from somewhere, but I added "history of" just for you.

[ This is a waste, though, and he's not going to fuck around with pouring this back in the bottle (gross). So that means he'll just drink the rest of both their drinks and go to hide the bottle again. ]

So. Thanks for the cigarettes and wearing of clothing. You're a sport.

You're welcome.

[Petre is sure he should be thanking Nate too. But he doesn't. He's a Mean Boy.]

We should do this again sometime.

[ Nate's hopes/expectations were never that high, and he's adjusting them lower as a result of this conversation. ]

... yeah. [ He doesn't sound so sure about that. But Petre is funny, in a way, and interesting, again in a way. An alarming way. A small doses kind of potential friend, maybe. ] Who are you, by the way?

Petre Dodrescu. That's European.

[yes, we know.]

(no subject)

serialized - 2015-03-05 20:24 (UTC) - Expand

broil - 2015-03-05 22:24 (UTC) - Expand