(no subject)

[optipesimism]

the sexting meme. Probably the easiest meme ever. Post a blank with post with your character's name and universe. For the replier, the reply must be a dirty text to the poster's phone, or a picture of naughty parts. It can be on purpose ...or a mistyped number. ("Whoops, sorry I showed you my junk! ... But how was it?!") The original poster can reply to the text or ignore it. Have fun!

Comments

tsukiyama shuu ( TOKYO GHOUL )

[gourmeat]

( open to misfires and direct messages. )

1/3 very accidental (sorry, I couldn't resist)

[patchedupjob]

So, I do the in-out in-out in-out about a fifty times, then a long stroke and then-

Sorry, but I keep confusing what comes after that. Can you help me remember?

[patchedupjob]

[Wait... That number.... ]

3/3

[patchedupjob]

You're not Touka.

lmao oh my god..

[gourmeat]

[And there he'd been, sitting down to enjoy a pleasant evening of listening to Rossini, believing that nothing could make the moment more perfect. He isn't sure what's more amusing -- the innocent phrasing of the first text, the deadpan realization of the third, or the fact that Kaneki has his number in the first place and he didn't even have to slip it into his pocket signed with crosses.]

Oh, my... This is quite an incriminating error, Kaneki-kun. [Incriminating and in Tsukiyama's possession. It's like Christmas.] Miss Kirishima would be devastated, were she to find out...

[patchedupjob]

Yeah, she'd break my fingers again, no doubt.


How unlikely to succeed would it be to ask you to keep silent about this mistake?

[gourmeat]

That's a very difficult question, Kaneki-kun. I could never bring myself to betray our dear Kirishima's trust.

[The comedic laughtrack comes in right about now.]

How about this? We can keep it between the two of us, if you will allow me to teach you some more... jolie☆ techniques.

[patchedupjob]

[Ugh. This guy and his timing... He's enjoying this way too much, he can tell!]

Jolie? I don't particularly care about it being 'pretty' or 'neat', Tsukiyama-san. It doesn't sound very practical.

[Google be blessed. He hopes he got the right translation because the suggested double meaning can only get worse.]

[gourmeat]

[Screwing with you is just so fun, Kaneki.]

Oh...? Such a shame...

[Having to do it by proxy of a third party makes it slightly less enjoyable, but...]

Tell me, Kaneki-kun. Don't you wish to impress Kirishima-san? Wouldn't it be far more enjoyable to sample her at the pinnacle of her flavour? I believe I can be of assistance.

[patchedupjob]

[He disagrees, but since when does anybody care if Ken finds being played with fun or not?

When he reads the proposal he frowns, but can't help also being intrigued.]

What do you have in mind, Gourmet? Also, for the record, nobody is going to eat anybody else.

[gourmeat]

Ridicolo! Kaneki-kun, is that truly all you see me as? What I have in mind is far more refined than such a bestial act.

[Well. There goes plan B.]

Shall we begin with a demonstration? You're free to judge for yourself, of course.

[patchedupjob]

After your last performance? Yes. That's all.



Can I bring somebody? [He's not going near you without some support lurking nearby!]

[gourmeat]

[Hurtful. It's not like he's always thinking about turning you into dinner, geez! Just. 98% of the time. 99? Come on.]

We can do it here, actually. There's no need to spoil this opportunity by involving anyone else.

[As much as he'd love to have Kaneki at arm's length at all times, always, he had started this with the intention of texting Touka... So, let's work on your texting skills, Kaneki-kun.]

[patchedupjob]

Do it here? Like over text?

[gourmeat]

Is that a problem?

[patchedupjob]

No... I just never thought about doing it like that.



Although I guess it can work too?

[gourmeat]

I believe trying new things to be the key to developing more refined skills.

Are you ready, Kaneki-kun?

[patchedupjob]

[Yes. No. Can they wait a year and then try again?]


...yes.

[He doesn't know if he's more terrified of what Tsukiyama might come up with or if he's perversely curious, since ...well, it's Tsukiyama. Whatever he does, you can't blame him for doing things with only half a heart.]

[gourmeat]

Très bon.

[He can almost feel Kaneki's conflict through the text, which is probably more encouraging than it should be.]

Show me what you're wearing.

[patchedupjob]

What?!

[Are we sure this isn't Tsukiyama being a pervert here? Ken definitely isn't. What do his clothes have to do with him forgetting the last part of his kagune training/work out plan Touka made?]

[gourmeat]

[You did this so it's your responsibility: the Kaneki Ken curse.]

Your clothing, Kaneki-kun. Or are you not wearing any?

[patchedupjob]

[Urgh..! Fine...

There is a good ten minute pause before a photo file is send. It shows a pair of comfortable loose pants and a shirt with a subtle pattern on it.


Five minutes later an awkwardly angled shot of his boxers follows, or at least the top part and some of the side of how they rest against his hips. Somebody obviously tried to make the picture as non-incriminating as possible (and ended up showing part of his scar instead.)]

. . . is this enough?

[gourmeat]

[Ah... Usually, an imperfection like that would be a disappointment, but seeing the faint scar on Kaneki's skin only earns a quirk of a brow, rather than a grimace. For the richest meal, he can forgive some inelegance -- and it begs the question of what bitterness the healing flesh of scar tissue might add to someone so sweet.]

Merci. These are perfect. [Thanks is definitely the appropriate thing to say in this situation.]

Your skin has a lovely pallor, Kaneki-kun. Like a patch of undisturbed snow amidst coal... You'll have to forgive me for finding it hard to look away.