bakerstreet | (no subject)

Wish Fulfillment Meme
(AKA a slightly different AU meme)

ROLL IT OR DON'T WHATEVER
THIS IS NOW AN ALTERNATE REALITY
(Disclaimer: Characters don't actually have to be aware anything's different and it probably works better if they're not anyway, this is wish fulfillment right here)

SUPERHERO WORLD: Put on your capes and keep your undies on the outside kids, it's time to save the world. Only those with the coolest names and the least crappy powers can survive in a world that doesn't understand. And something about responsibility I guess.
PIRATE WORLD: Because a whole meme dedicated to pirates isn't enough, it's never enough, never. Swash those buckles and put Errol Flynn to shame.
COWBOY WORLD: More lawless outlaws and people who don't need no stinkin' badges. Just make sure you're not the kind who wears flamboyant pink or you might mess up the timeline.
ROCK STAR WORLD: Sex, drugs, and stupid-looking outfits. From Gaga to Mercury to Richards to Jones, these proud innovators of the musical world (and other guys who played music I guess) pioneer new ways to look ridiculous and still get laid all the time. CATCH A PIECE OF THAT MAGIC AND BECOME A JUKE BOX HERO.
ROBOT WORLD: I don't even know anymore I'm just throwing this in here for the hell of it. You're robots. I guess do whatever robots do when they're not fantasizing about calculators.
DETECTIVE WORLD: Hard-boiled flatfoots chase crooked criminals in the black-and-white streets of a vaguely early 1900's America because that's the only place that ever had hard-boiled detectives, shut up, it's historical fact.
POTPOURRI WORLD: ROBOT COWBOY ROCK STARS. WHO ARE ALSO DINOSAURS.

I rescind the apology I was going to give for this meme because robot cowboy rock star dinosaurs.

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[He grins, starts the car and punches it. They end up back at the office in no time, without so much as a speeding ticket.]

[Because no cop could catch them]

[Zatanna, meanwhile, is lightly fanning herself.]

I love it when you do that.

[Well yeah.]

Why do you think I do it?

[Gets out of the car and walks into the office. He immediately turns on every fan.]

[She follows, taking a seat on the couch, chin in hands.]

So who exactly do you call to inquire about a possibly psudo-named mob guy?

I know a guy who knows a guy.

[Mysterious smile. He picks up the phone and dials.]

Of course you do.

[She sits quietly in her little spot, watching the master at work.]

[He just smiles again and starts talking to a guy on the other end. He starts rattling on in Italian, inquiring about Leo. The conversation lasts a few minutes and it sounds like he has to snap at the guy on the other end a few times to pry information out of him. But he hangs up the phone triumphantly.]

The guy's name is Leopold Reynolds. He's a mid-level gangster for the West Side gang. Mostly in charge of "cleaning up messes." He has a rap sheet a mile long, but it was mostly petty crimes until recently. You wanna guess what his most recent charge has been?

[She raises an eyebrow in amusement.]

Ricattare un ufficiale.

Ho sentito.

Nice accent. But, no. Kidnapping.

Huh. That's what I get for only listening to half the conversation.

Who'd he kidnap?

Catherine McCalister, the daughter of a prominent businessman who just so happens to be suspected of dirty business dealings.

This pattern is starting to turn into a map.

[Is he excited? Maybe.]

[She's waiting for him to start giggling with glee.]

Isn't she the same age as the Mayor's daughter? They look pretty similar, too.

[Give it a few minutes. He just might.]

You got it.

Interesting.

Think that could have anything to do with why the poor girl looked more frightened than normal?

Like it was some sort of warning aimed specifically at her, the mayor, and anyone else who tries to cross the gang? I'd say it'd shake up anyone.

More than just that.

If there a chance she knows this girl...the one who was kidnapped...not to mention could easily be mistaken for her...[Trails off, wanting to see if he makes the connection]

So you're thinking that he just screwed up?

It'd be one heck of a coincidence otherwise.

The question is: which end did he screw up on?

That's the question.

Why don't we ask dear old Leopold ourselves?

You know where to find him?

Oh, you're good.

I try.

Our next destination is a nice, swanky penthouse uptown. A refreshing change of pace, wouldn't you say?

I could kiss you.

[She's already up and heading for the door]

Since when do street guys live in penthouses?

[Doesn't respond to the first part because there's no response that won't be awkward, heh.]

Since he-- drumroll please-- started dating the second-in-charge's daughter. It's actually her penthouse.

Which means we need to gear up and be really, really careful.

[Especially since it was one of those things that had sort of just come out; if she stopped and thought about what'd she said, she probably wouldn't be looking so calm right then.]

Suddenly, it all makes sense.

When are we ever not careful?

...don't answer that. Just tell me if I should get the pistols out of the closet for this one.

[He thinks]

...No guns. We don't want this to turn nasty. Just make sure to have a spell or two ready.

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