awkward sex.

[bababooey]

ᴀᴡᴋᴡᴀʀᴅ xǝs

1) first time - first times are just plain awkward. what goes where and when? nothing can really prepare you for what it's like. good luck! 2) whiskey dick! - so you thought that drunken hookup would be fun but now the equipment won't work or you're too sloppy to function. it might be time to call it a night. awkward. 3) snore fest - it's been a long day and you're just tired or maybe you're bored, either way you can't seem to keep your eyes open, sex can be pretty awkward when you're falling asleep in the middle. 4) this isn't working - try as you might, this doesn't feel sexy or awesome. it's just not working for you at all. now can you work up the courage to say something or are you going to lay back, think of england and hope the other person notices. awkward. 5) that does not go there - exactly what it sounds like: wrong hole, bad touch, whatever. you're doing it wrong.  or maybe you're extra ticklish. and that touch right there makes you laugh. whoops. awkward. 6) position mishap - most people are not acrobats, they aren't as flexible or graceful as they want to be. all sorts of things can happen, falling off the bed, falling down, tripping over yourself, getting tangled up. porn always makes it look easy. 7) ouch! opps! - this might go a little with the option above but injuries do happen. pulling a hamstring, muscle cramps, a smack to, well, anywhere can result in a bloody nose, several bruises, or even a black eye. awkward. 8) coitus interruptus - whether you're somewhere pretty private and someone walks in or you're trying the public sex thing and someone spies you doing the nasty, you just got BUSTED. awkward. 9) broken toys - handcuffs won't unlock, ropes too tight, or that toy won't stop vibrating or maybe it needs new batteries right when things are getting good. 10) gross - so awkward bodily functions happen sometimes. you know, like farts or realizing you gotta go mid-whatever, sometimes these things happen. 11) too soon! - whoops, even just a little something, something felt so good that you got a little too excited and.... well you know. 12) free for all - there's so much more awkward to be had. think of your own.

 

Comments

Otacon | Metal Gear Solid | OTA

[otakon_geek]

kira yukimara • teen wolf

[galvanizing]

scott mccall | teen wolf

[cleave]

Steve Rogers | MCU | M/M

[imperfectsoldier]

Rebekah Mikaelson | TVD/Originals | ota

[originalbitch]

Mai | A:TLA | F/M

[maipokerface]

Thor Odinson | MCU | M/F

[nailedbyahammer]

Steve Rogers | MCU | OTA

[puncheshitlerforjustice]

[M/M Preferred but will work with M/F as well!]

This is terrible and all your fault

[smashyourbuns]

[Bruce doesn't know how he and Steve ended up sitting so close together on the couch. Maybe the furniture is tilted a little in his apartment. That's probably it.

Unfortunately, tilted furniture can't quite explain how they'd ended up eventually lying together on that couch, more focused on kissing and touching one another than the bad TV drama they'd been watching only moments earlier that was now mere background noise.

This was probably a bad idea. Bruce should probably have stopped this several minutes ago. But... it'd be nice to just try this a little. Keep calm, don't get too excited. Hell, this might even be good for him. Or terrible. Probably terrible, actually.]

I'm assuming this is somewhat a combination of 5/6/7

[puncheshitlerforjustice]

[Steve doesn't really know how this all happened. They were sitting on Bruce's couch talking about strategies and team building exercises, then were distracted by terrible shows, and then... kissing. Lots of kissing that lead to Steve on his back with a hand inside Bruce's shirt.

But it could be a great stress reliever, and the Avengers knew everything about stress considering their occupations. Also, what could be wrong with a bit of necking? Everyone needed it every once in a while, right? Right.

And that's when he decided he should push things further and slip his hand under the waistband of Bruce's pants.]

Sounds about right

[smashyourbuns]

[Yes, stress is one of his specialties. Avoiding stress, combating stress, not even thinking about the word stress. The normal activities one might associate with stress would be things like, well, fighting alien armies for example. Job interviews might be another, or having a really bad toothache.

People usually don't associate having someone's hand in their pants as stressful.

It does feel good. Too good, which is where Bruce is having his problem. His heart rate is starting to pick up more than he'd like, which is why he starts taking it easy with the kissing and focuses on evening out his breaths. He's got this under control. Very, very under control.]

[puncheshitlerforjustice]

[They're no longer kissing, but that's fine, because Steve's moved down to Bruce's neck and he's having fun there, leaving little hickeys and doing his best not to leave bruises on Bruce's skin. Mostly because "accidental bruising due to Super Strength" would be a downer.

Speaking of downers, Bruce is breathing hard. Then again, breathing hard is a sign of a good work out. This is considered a work out, right? Sort of. Kind of. Maybe. Maybe Bruce was just getting really into it. Steve knew he was.

Sure, he'd go with that.]

[smashyourbuns]

[Bruce quickly realizes that having Steve's lips and teeth at his neck isn't helping the situation at all. The keeping calm situation, that is. Maybe if he just doesn't think about how excited it's making him, he'll be alright?

Yeah. That...

No. That doesn't make any sense.

Bruce rests a hand on Steve's chest, intending it as a gesture to get him to stop. He's about to say something as well, but then that hand in his pants starts distracting him again and his words are cut off with a gasp before he can even start.]

Clay Kaczmarek - Assassin's Creed - OTA

[s16]

idek

[needmymp3]

[Sometimes you just have to try new things. Or old things you do a lot because they work for you, like a bed with a barred headboard and a set of handcuffs threaded through. It's totally her kink, hands pinned down or tied up, and is it ever working for her tonight.

Slick with a sheen of sweat in the dark, her thighs are wrapped around his waist and her head thrown back against the pillows. It's all fun and games until one of them realizes the key's gone.]

[s16]

[ Clay doesn't realize the key is missing until after he's snapped off the rubber and thrown it out, finished Rebecca off one more time like a gentleman, and flopped down beside her. He reaches to the nightstand beside them only to find the key gone. He blinks a few times before looking over at Rebecca. Usually he'd untie her by now but instead he just leans down and kisses her breast. ] Key's gone.

[needmymp3]

[She's still panting, but manages to close her mouth for a few deep breaths. But she gives him a look that's uncertain at first, but growingly concerned.] What?

What'd you say? [She tries to sit up but it's kind of hard, so her wrists go jangle-jangle and she ends up slumping back.]

[s16]

Key's gone. It's not on the table. I'll look on the floor, but I think we should get ready to break your thumbs, if needed. [ Clay's... joking. Maybe. ]

[auditor]

[ as exciting as certain inventions do sound... claudia doesn't trust the idea of vibrations in her cunt without demonstration. seems like too much could go wrong and that is the guiding principle of this, now. demonstrating. — and indulging because he wants to be fucked in the ass and claudia isn't one to ignore the chance to lean over a man. smirking and asking do you like that and but her smile is softer when she leans forward. curls in his face and a kiss along his jaw while she fingers him without missing the beat. ]

It isn't working.

[s16]

[ Clay is breathless under Claudia, on his knees with his hands holding himself apart for her. His cheeks are flush where she touches, his eyes fluttering shut with a quick, wavering laugh as he clenches around Claudia's fingers. ] You have to turn it on, first.

[auditor]

[ she slows, then, until she stops. fingers inside him, still, but just the first knuckles and curling along his muscles. claudia holds it near his ear, presses the button, so he can hear the sad, springing click click click of a vibrator that just won't work. ]

Don't get smart.

[s16]

[ Clay's breath comes short and he turns to the side, looking at the vibrator before up at Claudia. His next breath is a moan. If she thinks a broken toy is going to stop him, she has another thing coming-- especially when she's knuckle deep inside of him. ] Don't we have another?!

enjolras | les miserables | ota

[protester]

Rebecca Crane | Asscreed | Open

[needmymp3]

Bruce Banner | Avengers | Open

[smashyourbuns]

[This will not end well.]