Pain and Panic, Reporting for Duty!

[sockhopsolly]

Some of the coolest threads come from just putting characters in situations! This meme is a chance to do just that.

How to Play:

1. No blank top-levels. Put a "don't panic, but..." statement in your top-level. Examples:
   • "Don't panic, but my father's coming and I need you to hide me."
   • "Don't panic, but everyone's throwing up."
   • "Don't panic, but I think something just exploded around the corner."
   • "Don't panic, but there's someone following you."
   • "Don't panic, but your shoes clash with that purse really badly."
2. Respond to other people's statements. Maybe you can help them. Maybe you can make the situation worse. Maybe you can't help but panic.
3. ????
4. Profit

Comments

Cervantes 'Van' Grayson - Werewolf OC - OTA

[lycandsubscribe]

Don't panic, but the full moon is coming up.

[splice_of_life]

What? No.

[Mohinder glances at his watch and his already large eyes widen further.]

Where did the last two hours go?!

Just throw my files and ledger in that bag there!

[He’ll clean up the lab equipment.]

[lycandsubscribe]

[Van starts cleaning up, looking a little sheepish.]

I probably should have been watching the time closer. We still have about an hour before I fursplode, time to get someplace less populated.

[splice_of_life]

Less populated?

[Don't panic runs like a mantra through Mohinder’s thoughts as he tries to cap syringes without stabbing himself.]

In rush hour traffic? [This looks he’s giving you is the look of a man whose head might explode.] We won’t make it make it more than a few miles— leave all of that and get down to the car.

[lycandsubscribe]

If it's the right few miles, that could be enough. But as you say, boss.

[Van has been dealing with the werewolf thing since he hit puberty. This is absolutely not his first rodeo. The way Mohinder is struggling to reign in his panic is almost adorable.

He doesn't even bother grabbing his coat on the way out. He'll have fur soon enough.]

[splice_of_life]

Boss.

[The word is mumbled. So are the following words, though the soft British English has been replaced with his native Tamil and whatever meaning they hold is lost without translation.]

Go, go.

[He grabs his coat with his keys, pausing to lock up because he doesn’t need a neighbour rifling through his research, and follows Van down the six flights of stairs to the street. If he wants to buckle up, that might be ideal. Mohinder might drive safely when he isn’t trying to get a werewolf out of Brooklyn, but today he is a bit more nerve-racked.]

[lycandsubscribe]

[Van does buckle up, hiding a bit of a smirk.]

You're all sorts of flustered. You know I'm not the movie type of werewolf that becomes a mindless ravening monster, right?

[Like, sure, instincts will be riding him, but he's not going to be completely feral.]

[splice_of_life]

Oh, I’m terribly sorry. We are all of a sudden all right if you just wander down the street window shopping and asking pretty women for scratches behind the ear?

[Mohinder isn’t the sort of man to roll his eyes. He’s the sort of man to pull out into traffic without looking because he is staring daggers into the man seated beside him being utterly idiotic about the current mess they’re in.]

Shall I just take you to the dog park then?

[lycandsubscribe]

[Van at least knows better than to say yes to that, going back to looking out the window.]

Don't try to put a collar on me. That doesn't end well for either of us.

[splice_of_life]

[Likely for the best. Mohinder goes back to paying attention to various cabs trying to cut him off.]

Oh, sounds a bit like there’s a story behind that. Luckily, for us both, I did not think to grab one on the way out.

[lycandsubscribe]

I'll tell the story over breakfast tomorrow, once everything's fine and you're not so high strung.

[If he remembers to, and if tonight doesn't end in an encounter with animal control.]

[splice_of_life]

[There is a puff of laughter from Mohinder, genuine, even calmingly. He’s settles back into the driver’s seat and glances Van’s way away.]

I usually am just a mild mannered professor. I may have some clearly fantastical interests, I may teach classes on speculative human evolution, and I may have flown half across the world to get to know people like you, but…

I suppose I would be lying if I said I wasn’t naturally high strung. I still want that story.

[At least traffic isn’t half as bad as he’d thought.]

[lycandsubscribe]

People like me. You're still chasing the theory that lycanthropy is a genetic mutation? Something that can be traced genetically and explained instead of pure fuckin' magic?

[splice_of_life]

Magic.

[Mohinder laughs, though it isn’t cruel. He is just genuinely amused.]

The science and technology of today must seem to men a hundred years past like magic, surely. A hundred years from now, science will have come even further. I do not believe you to be magic, Van. I am to prove it.

[At least he has a lovely, velvety voice given how prone he is to monologuing.]

[lycandsubscribe]

You can certainly try. Just don't publish anything that'll lead people to my doorstep.

[He doesn't think Mohinder would ever deliberately endanger him, but he still worries a lot about the project and where it might lead. If an explanation is found for the silver thing, will that allow weapons that do even more harm to werewolves will become possible? Will there be young pups who actually try to get cured?]

[splice_of_life]

[That brings another laugh. This one is more self deprecating.]

My father publish a work on human evolution. He posited that phenomena like telekinesis, clairescence, even immortality was lurking in the genes of modern day people. They were not just waiting to be unlocked, but had been generations before.

[Dark eyes hold a smile as Mohinder looks Van’s way again.]

He was laughed right out of his tenure. Do not worry. I only want to help people like you understand themselves. I have no intention to spread your secrets. I do promise you that much.

[lycandsubscribe]

You keep using that phrase, 'people like you'. It can sound terribly othering, when you put it like that.

[But he understands the point Mohinder is trying to make. That's why he's going along with any of this at all.]

Starting to feel it itch. The change, I mean.

[splice_of_life]

Mm. I suppose it does sound like that. One would think, coming from a formerly colonised country, I would have learned better.

[Perhaps not, considering he is Cambridge trained and has adopted the very accent of the oppressors of his ancestors.]

I do apologise and I will work on it.

[That just about takes them to the highway, and Mohinder steps on the pedal again.]

Not to analyze you so soon after you called me out, but can you describe it a bit more to me?

[lycandsubscribe]

If I didn't know what was going on, I might wonder if I was having an allergic reaction to something. My skin feels hot and itchy. My back and shoulders are tense. The senses are starting to intensify.

I'm still able to hold myself together, but if I was already somewhere safe, this would be when I'd strip and shift, rather than letting it build. There's a sort of feeling of pressure, internally, a crescendo of sensation, of need. The longer I keep it back, the more intense the shift will start out. 'Fursplode' is only so metaphorical.

[Van works with words; usually other people's, but it's given him a great vocabulary for dissecting this sort of feeling.]

rose landry 🏒 hr 🏒 ota

[hardlaunch]

Don't panic, but there's a blind about us on the forums.

( f/m for shipping - ota for all other encounters! )

Tony Stark || MCU

[starkingenuity]

“Don’t panic, but that controlled explosion I said would be contained by the shield generator in the lab isn’t going to be exactly as contained or controlled as I let on. The explosion part’s true though.”

[aspolyhymnia]

“Oh, that’s fantastic. How likely am I to be atomised?”

[starkingenuity]

Ducking on his teeth, Tony shakes his head, still working to stop said explosion from his console. “Wrong kind of explosion for atomizing.” Is that a comfort?

[aspolyhymnia]

“That’s a bit better.” It’s a much bigger pain to come back from being vaporised than from just being blown into chunks.

[starkingenuity]

Glancing over the rim of his protective eyewear, which basically negates their usefulness, Tony scoffs. “You got the bits part right. Come here, hold these valves on the one and the quarter after three marks. Do not move the dial.”

Charles - Dead Boy Detectives - OTA

[just_aces]

1: "Don't panic! I can't do this if you're yelling at me!"
2: "Don't panic, yeah? It's just a bit of dirt, it'll be fine."
3: "Don't panic, I'm going to need you to keep your focus on me and don't look back."
4: "Don't panic, but I might have just triggered a trap."

Eve Munson - Stranger Things AU - OTA

[not_011]

1: "Don't panic, but when I say drop, you hit the dirt."
2: "Don't panic, they can't find us in here."
3: "Don't panic, this is easy, clean, disinfect, then bandage."

Patrick | Companion (post-canon AU) | OTA

[piecedit_together]

1: "Don't panic, it's just me."
2: "Don't panic, it's not my blood."
3: "Don't panic, just hold on tight. I've got you."
4: "Don't panic, we can figure this out."

Edwin Payne - Dead Boy Detectives - OTA (M/M for romantic/smut but anything goes for platonic)

[technicallyhellbound]

1: "Don't panic, keep quiet, keep low. We'll get out of this."
2: "Don't panic, it's just a lesser imp, and it's contained."
3: "Don't panic, the effects are only temporary."
4: "Don't panic, I shan't hurt you."

Eliot Spencer | Leverage | OTA

[90minutesofsleep]

1: "Don't panic, I know these guys."
2: "Don't panic, just hand me the fire extinguisher."
3: "Don't panic, you're not even going to need stitches."
4: "Don't panic, cool running tap water, don't use ice, that'll just make it blister faster."

Amy Rose | Sonic Boom | OTA

[heart_of_the_boom]

1) Don’t panic, Amy Rose is here!

2) Don’t panic, I know it’s a mess, but we can still salvage it!

Ariel 'Cap' Wilson | MCU (rule 63) | OTA

[imadebreakfast]

1: "Don't panic, I'm here to help."
2: "Don't panic, give me a nice deep breath, in, then out."
3: "Don't panic, he's with me."

Ruby Rose | RWBY | OTA

[silver_eyes_rose]

1) Don’t panic, but I’m outta ammo.

2) Don’t panic, Grimm are nearby.

3) Don’t panic, it’s just quicksand!

Mohinder Suresh | Heroes

[splice_of_life]

Don’t panic, but I’m afraid that the person at the front door is a bit less friendly than we hoped. Perhaps now would be a great time to head out of the apartment through the fire escape.

lonán burke — oc — ota

[athambia]

Don't panic, but:

⇾ I need you to tell me everything you know about rapid cellular regeneration.
⇾ they filled a FOIA request for all email communication that mentions either "Bigfoot," "Sasquatch," or "Sasq'ets."
⇾ I lost my PIV card.
⇾ your nose is bleeding.
⇾ the coffee machine's broken again.
⇾ your pants are on my coffee table.

( general permissions + a little world-building information )

[havenomercy]

A healing factor or raising the dead?

[athambia]

Well now I'm curious what experience you've got with necromancy. But no, just your standard accelerated healing in human physiology.

[havenomercy]

That was actually my brother's project, I was just an observer. But I'm certain I could recreate the results.

The trick is alien DNA from species that already have a strong, natural healing process.

Velvette | Hazbin Hotel | f/f for shipping

[backbonebitch]

Don't panic, but one of Val's actors caught an STD and it's spreading.

[aschmoozerandadummy]

Don't panic, but that new guest is Arackniss's third ex-wife.

[disneyprincessofhell]

Don't panic, but we just ran out of Apple Jacks.

Fumihiko Takaba 😂 JJK

[youlaughyoulose]

1. Don't panic, but my wallet is emptier than your head.

2. Don't panic but - [ It's at this point the enemy he had planned to warn about blows him up. ]

3. Don't panic, but there's a great big hairy beast here... and it says you owe it money!

Matt Murdock | MCU | OTA

[thedevilsworkisneverdone]

Don't panic but you're going to need a lawyer.

Bob Saginowski | The Drop | ota

[rocco]

Hey, don't panic. He don't bite anything but kibble and squeaky-toys. [The 'he' in question is a small blue-grey pitbull puppy, no more than a couple months old.]