Dye my flags all red

[hotlink]

pros and cons of dating your character






The premise is simple.

[1] Your character has a sign listing out all the pros and cons of dating them. Maybe they wrote it themselves, maybe they didn't.
[2] This list is displayed for everyone else to see.
[3] That's it.

Do not post any blank top levels. Comment with your character's list, then have fun reacting to other people's pros and cons.

Comments

lestat de lioncourt | interview with the vampire

[neednointroduction]

Pros
- A plethora of worldly experience.
- I assume your eyes serve you adequately?

Cons
- Occasional interpersonal drama amongst old acquaintances.

[nomadicflame]

I notice your moodswings are missing from the "cons" section, dear brat prince.

Matt Murdock | MCU | OTA

[thedevilsworkisneverdone]

Pros: Everyone needs a good lawyer, owns my own business, good in bed, nice smile and you will never catch me with some other person's naked selfies on my phone.

Cons: Commitment issues, works nights, no--I won't tell you where that scar came from, can't accurately appreciate your naked selfies.

[stupidbutgood]

Okay, I have to know. Has someone sent you naked selfies before?

Aemond Targaryen | House of the Dragon

[darotisentys]

Pros:
- I am the current ruler of my lands
- I am inclined to listen
- young


Cons:
- I do not "date"
- kinslayer, warmongering
- young
- one eye

[vengaboy]

Those can't all be universal dealbreakers.

The Lone Wanderer || Fallout 3

[wasteland_101]

Pros:
- Survivor
- Not a picky eater
- Will protect friends at all costs
- Can sleep anywhere

Cons:
- The dog comes first
- Everything likes to try and eat me
- Potential radiation poisoning
- A huge brat

2B | NieR Automata | M/F

[executioner2e]

Pros:
- Will never let any physical harm come to you if she can help it
- Cheap date; she doesn't require food, water, or meaningless gifts. In fact, she finds gifts to be manipulative.
- Deadpan snarker through and through so long as you never point out she's doing it.
- Incredibly pragmatic
- Great sparring partner
- Likes animals and can ride a moose

Cons:
- Emotions are prohibited
- If you think she expressed emotion, she did not.
- Obfuscating the truth and outwardly lying are two different things. According to her.
- She is an android. Therefore, there is a lot she doesn't understand and some things, she would rather not understand to begin with. Also she will sooner or later be limited to how she is programmed.
- Pod 042 may not like you and that could be a problem. He is very protective.

[postboy]

[ Picollo quirks a brow, one ear twitching. She knows he's awkward about the lovey-dovey but they always did have a connection... ]

...What sort of problems can a pod even cause?

phyre | bloodlines 2

[nomadicflame]

Pros:
Eternal.
Educated.
Well-traveled.
Knows real magic.


Cons:
Tends to brood.
Stiff conversationalist.
Bites. (Could be a pro if you like that.)
Wanderlust.
Cold all the time.
Late riser.

[cardale]

I don’t know. Some of those cons almost certainly belong on the pros list, in my opinion.

[ biting, for one. brooding, for another - eli thinks its endearing. ]

Yamada 💭 OC - OTA

[changeyourself]

Pros:
-Excellent cook, likes feeding you.
-Relaxed, no drama
-Likes using shapeshifting to make you happy
-Always up for a good time

Cons:
-Lowkey weird all the time, highkey weird sometimes
-Bit emotionally dead, doesn't take much seriously
-Job might kill him
-Good time might kill you

?
-Comes with a kid

[scarlet_devil]

You have a kid? Why do I not know about this?

Uralun | OC | OTA

[sunsetwater]

Pros:
-will try just about anything once
-dreamstuff manipulation opens up a world of possibilities
-no concept of modesty or monogamy

Cons:
-hair gets everywhere
-'privacy' means 'literally inside your head'
-no concept of modesty or monogamy

[cardale]

… As in, you’re inside my head?

[ nope. don’t like that! ]

copia ( ghost )

[sacramenta]

PROS
- generational wealth
- rock star from a family of rock stars
- seriously, check out his twin
- keeps in great shape
- romantic and generally sweet
- earnest and hard worker
- looks great in really tight pants
- good with magic
- keeps rats (if you're into that)
- satanic royalty (.. if you're into that)

CONS
- anxious
- awkward af
- can be a petty bitch when he's pissed
- you probably won't see his bare hands for months
- lives in a spooky, drafty old abbey
- has a passel of protective ghouls
- you may be haunted by the ghost of his mom
- keeps rats (if you're not into that)
- satanic royalty (.. if you're not into that)


[ .. clearly, given the look on his face, copia didn't write this. ]

[pluviosus]

... I don't want to be haunted by your mom.

{ legitimately terrifying }

Peter Parker | TASM/MCU | ota

[stupidbutgood]

Pros

Knows all the best places to eat for cheap in Queens.

Loves taking pictures.

Can fix just about anything.

Cons

Full time grad student with full time class schedule.

Freelance photography is not a really predictable gig.

Difficult to get a hold of sometimes.

[yeschef]

I wouldn't mind a food tour of Queens. I didn't really get to explore New York when I lived there. I worked all the time and pretty much didn't leave Manhattan.

SecUnit | Murderbot | ota

[faultyequipment]

Cons:
- Asexual pseudo-human/demi-bot with a pretty severe aversion to touch (outside of life-threatening situations).
- Whatever the opposite of being emotionally fluent is? That. That's SecUnit.
- The solution to most of its problems generally revolves around neutralising the threat, usually literally. Bloods, guts and gunfire tend to be involved in some capacity.

Pros:
- Once it decides you're its human, it's ride or die. Loyalty is mandatory, not optional.
- Has absolutely no compunctions about taking bullets for you. Who doesn't want a walking, talking shield following them around?
- Can Netflix and chill with the best of them... provided you stay six inches apart at all times.

[comfortindarkness]

So you're offering companionship without all the messy emotions? [Jack shrugs easily.]

I'm not seeing a down side.

Richard Stuhmp | OC| OTA

[ruff_patch]

Cons:
-perpetually unemployed
-little to no ambition
-drinks too much
-is a huge nerd
-rude
-might hump your leg

Pros:
...


-uhh he's really funny?

[havenomercy]

You certainly seem to know yourself.

Dark Schneider - Bastard!! - M/F

[pervy_inuyasha]

[Dark Schneider's list starts with cons first, which has him so agitated that each item listed will have a note alongside it. Imagine a small, poorly drawn Dark Schneider head alongside it--not unlike the notes one sees at the end of a chapter in a manga.]

Cons
Loud (It's my voice! I'll use it as I please!)

Abrasive (At least this thing isn't calling me an--)

Asshole (#$%!)

Misogynistic (I'm a perfect gentleman! I see them off pleasured and happy! What else do they need?)

Selfish (Except in the bedroom~)
Arrogant (What's wrong with confidence!?)

Manipulative (It's for your own good)

Pros
Not a single physical blemish. (Perfection personified!)

Rockin eyebrows. (Expressive!)

Incredibly well endowed. (It's canon!)

Engages in after care. (Of course! It's the right thing to do, you know.)

Extremely powerful. (The greatest wizard to ever live!)

Denies fate on the regular. (It's your life. Live it your way.)

Will protect you. (If I'm around.)

Will save you. (I can't be everywhere, dammit!)

Can revive you. (If it hasn't been too long.)

Creator made some h-doujinshi years ago, so he has official h-content. (Jealous?)

[executioner2e]

[sounds about right. 2B sighs.]

I wouldn't lose to you twice. [she thinks...it was a stupid wager anyway.] But...the sex was pleasant.

[for as loud as he is, she is still waiting to actually find him annoying, but as it turns out, he still scares her less than other individuals she's encountered. he's at least easy to read.]

cliff harris | oc

[occultesque]

pros:
• owns a car
• has a nice apartment in downtown chicago
• British
• funny
• has a really nice neighbor who likes to bring him a lot of homecooked meals that he will definitely share with you
• can help you break into your home or car if you ever lose your keys
• monster hunter (maybe you think that's cool)
• friends with someone who owns a bar, so good times are on him

cons:
• technically unemployed
• the apartment belongs to his uncle but his uncle is never there so he just lives there rent free to look after it
• sometimes is mistaken as a member of the supernatural himself (he is not, but this can get awkward and weird)
• might bring his weird occult shit home with him
• can and will go MIA for a few days (because of monster hunting)
• comes with his own stalker
• has a weird attachment to a small yarn worry doll
• monster hunter (maybe you think he's crazy)

[havenomercy]

What kind of weird occult shit?

eliot “eli” ever | villains series by v.e. schwab

[cardale]

pros:
• pretty face
• wildly intelligent / pre-med candidate
• hasn’t aged since he died at 22 years old - though this could also be a con for someone older
• can’t technically die again, so if you’re immortal, he’s with you forever
• a church boy who goes to church and reads his bible. if you’re into that

cons:
• incredibly paranoid, especially about people’s intentions
• undiagnosed psychopathic tendencies
• to that point, he’s so sure he’s God’s favorite little boy
• comes with a scorned ex … friend? boyfriend? reluctant queerpatonic life partner? that is constantly trying to kill him (and vice versa)
• you will probably never be more important to him than his mission, victor vale (see above), or God

[nomadicflame]

This is an interesting list.

mercy craft ( original )

[rituale]

PROS
- tall, hot twink
- will try anything once
- world traveler, probably knows the language (or can pick it up quickly)
- steady employment
- always pleasant
- no disapproving parents
- domestic goddess

CONS
- emotionally unavailable
- will ghost you just when you're starting to really like him
- you'll probably have increasingly shitty luck the longer you know him
- you'll definitely suffer
- you'll probably die horribly if he doesn't ghost you
- catholic guilt
- he's literally the antichrist

[cardale]

Can’t die horribly if I’ve already died before, I don’t think.

[ pro? maybe? is it concerning he’s not concerned with the antichrist bit? maybe???? ]

Tinkerbell | OTA

[tinkerbell_pirate]

Pros
Cute
Portable
Enables flight
Fantastic kisser
Good with children
Ambitious
Loves the sea!
Feisty
Master swordswoman
Fantastic leadership skills

Cons
Greedy/Capricious
Teases people relentlessly
Always in trouble
Slightly murderous
Flies off a lot
Will steal your shit
Lots of emotional baggage
Caretaker of hundreds of feral children
Might get you eaten by a Kraken
Won't put out before marriage

[fairy_pushing]

"Slightly" murderous?

Shinobu Jacobs | No More Heroes 3

[rippedoff]

Pros
• Is super confident in herself (but not over-confident!) and if she likes you enough (but only if she likes you enough), she'll also prop you up too.
• Is way too straightforward to ever lie to you
• Stylish as fuck, both in and out of fights
• If she's really into you, there's no one more ride or die than her.
• Does her best to actively make her neighborhood a better place
• Surprisingly great with children.

Cons
• Is so straightforward, she can be kind of a stick in the mud.
• Extremely stubborn, will absolutely step in an unwinnable fight to save a loved one with no regard for her own life.
• If she's in the mood, the banter and/or shit talk never stops. Also often rude as fuck in this mood too
• Constantly training to the point she prefers movies that she can learn more swordplay tricks from for herself to master.
• Still does assassination jobs on the side (even if a vast majority of the money goes toward making her students' lives better)
• Both arms are prosthetic, you'll never feel her touch (even if she is still kinda handsy regardless)

[man_with_no_name]

[He tips his hat with a nod in her direction.]

Well, ain't a lot of down with all that up. And if you're gonna have to kill, hell - might as well get paid for it.

michael afton | five nights at freddy's (games)

[ptoma]

pros:

• points for your Freak cred
  
• free pizza*
  
• you'll always be the hot one
  
• robots are cool
  
• can mimic and recreate any voice for prank calls or mild fraud

cons:

• technically classifies as necrophillia
  
• arcade games are rigged
  
• huge jerk
  
• so fucking haunted bro

*with the purchase of any pizza of equal or greater value

[meltinglight]

Voice mimicry? You never told me that you could copy voices. That's almost as exciting as BOGO pizza.

princess serenity | sailor moon

[transmigrate]

✓ Current princess and future queen of our known galaxy.
✓ Soft vibes only.
✓ Openly, unapologetically affectionate.
✓ Eager.
✓ Romantic.
✓ Kind-hearted.
✓ Untapped and unknowable potential cosmic power.
✓ Loves pretty much everyone she's ever met.

✗ Hopeless romantic? We mean disaster romantic.
✗ Dramatic. A bit of a crybaby.
✗ Brat. Will stick her tongue out at you when she forgets royal protocols.
✗ Lazy. Also...she's not. Uh. That bright?
✗ Uncoordinated mess.
✗ Protective guardians who may kill you if you get too close.
✗ Loves pretty much everyone she's ever met.

rogue | x-men: evolution

[empowerment]

PROS
- You can have a goth girlfriend.

CONS
- You can never touch your goth girlfriend.

[abloodybird]

Okay, but like. How are we defining "touch." Hypothetically.

Benjamin "Dex" Poindexter | MCU | OTA

[ricochetingbullets]

Pros: Ridiculously loyal, will make you the center of my world, will keep you safe at all costs, and can win you any prize at one of those rigged carnival booths.

Cons: Unable to feel emotions properly, might definitely will stalk you, is an escaped felon currently on the run, and has been known to lash out in a deadly fashion when my anger gets the best of me.

[fantomen]

What's "properly" mean? Is there a right way to feel things?

sephiroth ( final fantasy vii )

[vehementi]

( PROS )
• very beautiful; just look at him
• powerful
• likes to read
• very passionate about his goals
• big sword :)

( CONS )
• emotionally stunted
• socially awkward
• massive Mommy issues
• struggles with the concept of boundaries
• burned down a village
• murdered some people
• summoned a giant meteor to destroy the planet
• tried to become God
• keeps getting his ass kicked by a blond twink instead

[unsocials]

You'd think you'd learn after a couple of times.

Kuroudo Akabane - GetBackers

[bloodyhurricane]

Pros
- Gentlemen
- Powerful
- Strong work ethic
- Easily amused
- Always armed, even when appearing not to be.
- Good imagination

Cons
- Might stab you in the back if it leads to accomplishing goals/amusement.
- Will kill without remorse
- Kind of obsessed with finding the limits of his power
- High body count

seto kaiba | yugioh dm

[blue_ice]

pros:
- wealthiest man in town, money is never an issue
- attractive? probably?
- private jet, and he's the pilot
- game night is never boring
- super-cute and friendly little brother

cons:
- major attitude problem (haughty, superiority complex)
- seems to believe loving someone is a weakness (tough to get through to)
- the private jet is cartoonishly shaped like his favorite dragon card
- game night may become dangerous if he loses
- the little brother is a gremlin child who will not hesitate to attack bad matches

[catsgothistongue]

[He wants to ask about the dragon jet or make a crack about it, but he's more curious about...]

How dangerous we talkin' here? Lose your house dangerous, lose your life dangerous, stop me if I'm gettin' warmer here.

[Game night.]