bakerstreet | Take me out

( it doesn't matter what it looks like. they've been friends for so long that it isn't unusual to be seen together, whether it's walking home from school, biking along the narrow paths near the woods, sitting in front of the convenience store to swallow down fizzy soda or thumbing through the scant few magazines at the grocery store check out line. wherever he is, hikaru is usually there to follow. it has nothing to do with feelings, nothing to do with romance, nothing to do with all the pretty words that he doesn't know how to say, or even believe in, when it comes to all that: it's just the way it's always been, and no one's ever asked any questions about it. it's never mattered, before. there's what he wants, and what he knows he can't have--and now, hikaru is one of those things, long gone to let whatever it is here that lives in his body continue on in his stead.

so it doesn't matter. does it? it's not like this hikaru is seeing it in the way that he wants him to, despite the words: despite the declarations, the staunch determinations, the way that he can't seem to stand being apart from him for more than a night.

but if it doesn't matter, then the way his heart is pounding in his chest shouldn't matter, either. it shouldn't matter that hikaru had cheekily declared this a date~ when he'd mustered up the courage to ask him; it shouldn't matter that his hands feel oddly clammy, damp and nervous as he forces his fingers around the length of the spoon in his cup. does this creature even know what a date is? or what it means? or what that would mean for the both of them? or how it would be impossible, just as impossible as it is to think that the person he--

no, he can't think about that. not with those bright eyes on him, staring at him, from across the small, narrow table next to the shaved ice stand. )

...You wanted to win something, right? ( his voice is soft, and quiet, lulled into wishful thinking; his gaze darts up, across the narrow street to where one of the sole little arcades in their pathetic little town sits, the doors open, a large fan running near it to try to cycle hot air out and cooler air in. )

From the crane games, there. ( his tongue feels so thick in his mouth, like it's the fault of the red syrup caked over his half-eaten ice. ) That's a normal thing, for a...you know.

( a date. )

A date?

[ The snaggle-toothed grin that 'Hikaru' flashes in response is flawless. 'Hikaru' teases him as naturally as the original Hikaru did, humor being his go-to defense against Yoshiki's anxious glances and dour moods. The way he nibbles on the end of his scooped straw and glances over at the crane game is just as the original Hikaru would have done. He behaves in the only way he knows how to, having never been any other person before being Hikaru, as he'd never been a person in the first place.

Yoshiki knows the truth, of course, and that knowledge allows him to see miniscule imperfections in the copy. But even so, 'Hikaru' can't help but continue to be Hikaru. So when he looks back to Yoshiki, there's a characteristic glimmer in his eye. ]

Yeah, I wanna win something. For you. Right?

[ Because that's what you do on dates. Looking quite pleased with the idea, he stabs his straw into the flavorless ice shavings at the top of his cup, crunching them into what remained of the syrup at the bottom. ]

So that means ya can't give it to Kaoru after, alright? I mean, I'll know if ya do, so don't try to pull a fast one. Ya gotta pick something you want, an' then keep it. Or else it's not a you know kinda thing. [ 'Hikaru' hops up from his chair, as if the issue was already settled, even though he's still talking. ] Oh, think they got a plushie of that one chick with the huge tits from Master + Master, maybe?

( there's something about the way that the blush, embarrassed, that settles over his face feels both too hot and too cold at the same time: like it comes with a wash of dread, bubbling itself down into his bones, into his blood. it feels so good to hear hikaru say something like that, even if he knows that it's just the creature here, using his voice; it feels so good that it feels bad, like it's something he shouldn't have ever thought to want. a date like they could ever be like that, especially here, where norms are too strictly upheld, where anything perceived as strange is immediately written off. a part of him wants to laugh it off; he can't find it in him to do it.

instead, methodically, he crushes up more ice into his cup, as though he's willing it all to melt and wilt at the bottom. )

I'm not gonna give it to her. ( --comes the first mumbled argument, a little sour, because he had been idly thinking that if push came to shove, he could brush it all off by saying hikaru won it for his sister; that would be a normal thing, anyway.

but he doesn't really want that, does he? his eyes narrow, glumly looking up at hikaru as he eases out of his seat. )

You really wanna give me a plushie of a hot girl on our... you know?

( it's almost teasing, except he's making a face about it; reluctantly, he pushes himself up onto his feet, clamping a hand down over the mess that's left of his shaved ice cup, already easing sidelong to stretch a pale arm to toss it in the trash. )

I feel like it should be something better. I'm not gonna look at some lady's chest and think of you. ( a playful pause, as he falls into step with hikaru. ) If that's what you want, then I guess I understand.

Aw, c'mon. A plushie with huge tits is hilarious. You'd totally think of me any time you see it!

[ 'Hikaru' grins at him as they enter the arcade, its flashing neon lights blanketing his pale-yellow face and white hair with dazzling colors. This, too, is part of the act. Just as Yoshiki knows the truth about him, 'Hikaru' knows the truth about Yoshiki - even if he doesn't fully understand it, he remembers the way these conversations used to go with Hikaru. Deflecting his friend's anxieties with cheap jokes wasn't just an act to help maintain a heterosexual barrier between them. It was Hikaru's way of protecting Yoshiki, giving them both plausible deniability and a sense of comfortable normalcy. And, yes... that doesn't entirely apply anymore, but 'Hikaru' doesn't know how to be anyone other than Hikaru. This is what Hikaru would have done. Right?

A long row of UFO catchers presents many opportunities. There's one in the middle with Master + Master merchandise, but nothing of the well-endowed love interest. 'Hikaru' clicks his tongue in disappointment. ]

Aw, too bad. Well, that stuff looks like it'd be kinda hard to win anyway. The push-to-win ones are scammy. See anythin' you like?

'hikaru' // the summer hikaru died

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Everly Shaw || Original Character (please read profile) ||M/f for shipping

Depending on the weather, a trip to the movies and dinner, or a walk through the park!

Let's go out for ice cream, hang out and talk.

A little hole in the wall place I know and then Coney Island?

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bonfire on the beach date!

Conversation over drinks and/or copious amounts of desserts.

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The local grocer.

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I can get us reservations wherever you want.

A picnic on a high hill! We will have our fill of a beautiful view, under clear sun or starry sky.