Let's just say the only reason I never got arrested back home was because the town I grew up in had one cop that ran the same route every night, so we knew how to avoid him. I am more used to hearing "Karen you can't do that, that's dangerous," so this IS a nice change of pace. Honestly, I feel like you're going to have more fun doing jealous ex-boyfriend.
Karen Page evading the authorities is a side of you I did not expect.
That's what I hear most of the time too. So basically neither of us is gonna be the voice of reason is what I'm taking away from this.
Hell. Yes. I was born for this role. I'll come in with a bit of "So this is who you're replacing me with??!" followed by a lot of "Karen please no, baby, listen, I can change!" pretty sure your date will be long gone by then.
[ And likely half the restaurant would then be watching the drama unfold, so there's also that. ]
If that's an invitation, then I accept. Not just saying that because I've had a full sheet cake and tequila.
[ He's going to wish he'd found a smoother way of saying that when he's sobered up. ]
We need a responsible, mostly law abiding third party. Any ideas? Or fuck it, actually, no third party and we make bets on who gets arrested first.
See this is what I'm talking about, I told you you were full of good ideas! I think we could. But it depends on if you can forgive me for all the fake stupid shit I did that led to our messy break-up.
It's not not an invitation. Just make sure sober Joaquin is the one that accepts it.
[All things considered, it's pretty smooth for someone surfing a tide of tequila and sugar.]
I was going to say, anyone I know that's a responsible, law abiding third party actually works for law enforcement and should probably not be involved in this. Also, I will absolutely get arrested before you do.
I think I could sell forgiveness in the name of a comped dessert.
I'm writing it down so that sober Joaquin remembers to ask you about it.
[ Because he definitely can't trust his memory to the tide of tequila and sugar he's surfing. ]
Yeah? What makes you so sure?
If we both really sell it I bet you they will comp your meal too, just to get us to stop. I guess it depends on the restaurant, the fancy ones really don't like it when you make a scene.
Ok just don't judge my handwriting, I'm not at my best here.
[ He snaps a quick pic and sends it to her. Written on a scrap of paper in slightly wobbly scrawl is "karen said it's not NOT an invite, so ask her about herself when you're not drunk and don't fuck it up" ]
You'd do that? That's so sweet. Might be a lost cause though, it's remarkably difficult to keep me out of trouble in general, just so you know.
So you're not a fancy restaurant kinda girl huh? Learning more and more as we go, and yeah I'm adding this to the note also, don't worry.
[ Making sense of this note tomorrow is going to be interesting, but that's a tomorrow problem! ]
[Karen has to zoom in to read the note, but she smiles when it comes into focus.]
I'm not going to lie, that is...shaky handwriting. The note itself is cute, though.
I would. Sounds like we might have to have a "who's better at getting into trouble" competition, though.
Definitely not. I mean, I get why people like it. How it's - an experience, I guess? But I always feel like a fish out of water. You're going to have a pretty detailed note at this rate.
[ So long as she thinks the note is cute, he's happy. ]
That is a competition I have many years of practice in. I feel confident in my odds.
No I get it, it's like you can't just relax and enjoy the food, everything's a little too formal. That and some of the dishes are for people with more experimental palates than me. I'm definitely not a caviar guy.
I still think I've got you beat, but what drew you to New York? Most people come here and become more of a shit show, not the other way around.
[ Or more like, it was a city where you could be a shit show and still manage to be a mostly functioning member of society. Harder to do that in small towns. ]
I'm all about trying new foods, I just don't want to eat fish eggs. My favorite is barbacoa de borrego, it's lamb slow cooked in banana leaves, and oh god it's amazing. You ever had it?
What's your favorite food? For the sake of the list/case file, I gotta know.
The town I grew up in had less than 400 people. I'd gone to Boston a few times with friends and liked the idea of living in a city. But it still didn't feel big enough to get lost in. New York seemed like it fit the bill. To be fair, I haven't exactly stopped getting in trouble since I got here, it's just...a different kind of trouble.
I haven't tried barbacoa de borrego, but it does sound incredible. It's really hard to go wrong with lamb dishes, the flavor is always amazing when you slow cook it. Is this something you like to cook, or are you a pick it up from a restaurant guy?
Well, if it's for the case file... There's a seafood biryani I love to get when I'm eating out. But my favorite thing to make is pancakes.
Less than 400? Holy shit. Well, New York's definitely big enough to get lost in. I'd always thought of Miami as a big place, it's where I grew up; then I came here and realized you can be pretty much invisible if you want to be.
What kind of trouble are we talking about, dealing with bad guys? Helping people get out of rough situations?
My mother taught me how to cook it, and I do a decent job but there are a couple places that are pretty amazing. When I don't have the time to slow cook it overnight, that's my go-to.
Seafood biryani and pancakes, added to the list. Can't go wrong with pancakes. If I hadn't filled my stomach with sugar and alcohol all this food talk would make me starving.
Oh yeah, it was the very definition of "everyone knows everyone else's business." I've never been to Miami, but it sounds like a great city. Do you ever get to visit?
A little bit of both. I work as a PI, so my day to day can be pretty varied.
It's nice that you cook it when you have time. I always like the idea of carrying on the family tradition of a recipe.
This list is already getting long. It really is hard to go wrong with pancakes, though. And hey, your non-sugary food and water should be there in about five minutes. You wouldn't have to be hungry for long.
Yeah that wouldn't be too ideal, I get why you wanted to move.
It has it's moments, for sure. Definitely miss the beaches. But I visit the parents back home a couple times a month, try to, at least. Depends on where I'm needed, sometimes missions keep me overseas longer than I'd like.
Getting into a different kind of trouble makes sense, now that you mention being a PI. That's a hell of a career choice, takes lots of passion and a lot of patience. You should see the state of my case file on you, it's a mess but I think I'll still be able to decipher it tomorrow.
If I didn't cook it regularly, I'd get rusty and my mom would never let me hear the end of it. I'd disgrace the family name.
It just arrived actually, and I know I said this already but this is the nicest thing anyone's ever done for me. How am I ever gonna repay you??
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trashtalker) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
bakerstreet2025-05-22 09:00 pm
no subject
I am more used to hearing "Karen you can't do that, that's dangerous," so this IS a nice change of pace.
Honestly, I feel like you're going to have more fun doing jealous ex-boyfriend.
no subject
That's what I hear most of the time too. So basically neither of us is gonna be the voice of reason is what I'm taking away from this.
Hell. Yes. I was born for this role. I'll come in with a bit of "So this is who you're replacing me with??!" followed by a lot of "Karen please no, baby, listen, I can change!" pretty sure your date will be long gone by then.
[ And likely half the restaurant would then be watching the drama unfold, so there's also that. ]
no subject
Exactly. Especially if tequila is involved.
[Easily half the restaurant would be watching the drama unfold. Which means...]
Do you think if we staged a reunion at the end we could get a comped dessert?
no subject
[ He's going to wish he'd found a smoother way of saying that when he's sobered up. ]
We need a responsible, mostly law abiding third party. Any ideas? Or fuck it, actually, no third party and we make bets on who gets arrested first.
See this is what I'm talking about, I told you you were full of good ideas! I think we could. But it depends on if you can forgive me for all the fake stupid shit I did that led to our messy break-up.
no subject
[All things considered, it's pretty smooth for someone surfing a tide of tequila and sugar.]
I was going to say, anyone I know that's a responsible, law abiding third party actually works for law enforcement and should probably not be involved in this.
Also, I will absolutely get arrested before you do.
I think I could sell forgiveness in the name of a comped dessert.
no subject
[ Because he definitely can't trust his memory to the tide of tequila and sugar he's surfing. ]
Yeah? What makes you so sure?
If we both really sell it I bet you they will comp your meal too, just to get us to stop. I guess it depends on the restaurant, the fancy ones really don't like it when you make a scene.
no subject
Oh, I'll do it on purpose to keep you out of trouble.
I never know what to do with myself in a fancy restaurant. I'd probably chip in from another table if I saw someone else making a scene like that.
no subject
[ He snaps a quick pic and sends it to her. Written on a scrap of paper in slightly wobbly scrawl is "karen said it's not NOT an invite, so ask her about herself when you're not drunk and don't fuck it up" ]
You'd do that? That's so sweet. Might be a lost cause though, it's remarkably difficult to keep me out of trouble in general, just so you know.
So you're not a fancy restaurant kinda girl huh? Learning more and more as we go, and yeah I'm adding this to the note also, don't worry.
[ Making sense of this note tomorrow is going to be interesting, but that's a tomorrow problem! ]
no subject
I'm not going to lie, that is...shaky handwriting.
The note itself is cute, though.
I would. Sounds like we might have to have a "who's better at getting into trouble" competition, though.
Definitely not. I mean, I get why people like it. How it's - an experience, I guess? But I always feel like a fish out of water. You're going to have a pretty detailed note at this rate.
no subject
[ So long as she thinks the note is cute, he's happy. ]
That is a competition I have many years of practice in. I feel confident in my odds.
No I get it, it's like you can't just relax and enjoy the food, everything's a little too formal. That and some of the dishes are for people with more experimental palates than me. I'm definitely not a caviar guy.
This note might end up being two pages.
no subject
Don't be too confident. I was a professional shit show before I moved to New York.
Exactly! I'm not crazy about caviar, it's too briny. I do like trying new foods though. What's your favorite dish?
Careful, if you spill over to three I think it technically turns into a case file.
no subject
[ Or more like, it was a city where you could be a shit show and still manage to be a mostly functioning member of society. Harder to do that in small towns. ]
I'm all about trying new foods, I just don't want to eat fish eggs. My favorite is barbacoa de borrego, it's lamb slow cooked in banana leaves, and oh god it's amazing. You ever had it?
What's your favorite food? For the sake of the list/case file, I gotta know.
no subject
To be fair, I haven't exactly stopped getting in trouble since I got here, it's just...a different kind of trouble.
I haven't tried barbacoa de borrego, but it does sound incredible. It's really hard to go wrong with lamb dishes, the flavor is always amazing when you slow cook it. Is this something you like to cook, or are you a pick it up from a restaurant guy?
Well, if it's for the case file...
There's a seafood biryani I love to get when I'm eating out. But my favorite thing to make is pancakes.
no subject
What kind of trouble are we talking about, dealing with bad guys? Helping people get out of rough situations?
My mother taught me how to cook it, and I do a decent job but there are a couple places that are pretty amazing. When I don't have the time to slow cook it overnight, that's my go-to.
Seafood biryani and pancakes, added to the list. Can't go wrong with pancakes. If I hadn't filled my stomach with sugar and alcohol all this food talk would make me starving.
no subject
I've never been to Miami, but it sounds like a great city. Do you ever get to visit?
A little bit of both. I work as a PI, so my day to day can be pretty varied.
It's nice that you cook it when you have time. I always like the idea of carrying on the family tradition of a recipe.
This list is already getting long. It really is hard to go wrong with pancakes, though. And hey, your non-sugary food and water should be there in about five minutes. You wouldn't have to be hungry for long.
no subject
It has it's moments, for sure. Definitely miss the beaches. But I visit the parents back home a couple times a month, try to, at least. Depends on where I'm needed, sometimes missions keep me overseas longer than I'd like.
Getting into a different kind of trouble makes sense, now that you mention being a PI. That's a hell of a career choice, takes lots of passion and a lot of patience. You should see the state of my case file on you, it's a mess but I think I'll still be able to decipher it tomorrow.
If I didn't cook it regularly, I'd get rusty and my mom would never let me hear the end of it. I'd disgrace the family name.
It just arrived actually, and I know I said this already but this is the nicest thing anyone's ever done for me. How am I ever gonna repay you??
no subject