I don’t think I am I’m pretty sure she thinks I’m working for the Tories and that’s why I called my boss evil (For your American reference that would be like working for the Republicans)
I would have assumed you were just working a job where you had to answer to some evil corporate overlord. But I can see how the wires would get crossed.
Unfortunately it was all champagne. I’m not sure the English upperclass understand that not all parties need prosecco or champagne as the only drinks and they’re allowed to be a bit common and have a beer. And I had to wear black tie. It was terrible.
Well I suppose that could be an option, though I was trying not to anger my boss any more than usual
Honestly if you don’t mind putting up with the toffs then yes I thought it would be fine but apparently almost the entire rest of the team are good at schmoozing and the two who aren’t went and abandoned me I’m going to spread a rumour they went off to make out in revenge
Oh he’s a prick of the highest order so I wouldn’t be shocked He told us all to behave and try to only drink three glasses and otherwise to “not embarrass him in any way, shape or form.” Not entirely sure we managed as one of the investors tried to hit on me and I glared at him until he went away
Thank you Everyone already thinks they’re a thing anyway That would be great because apparently dead-eyed stares are not an appropriate strategy Not sure what else he expected of me
Why did he bring you? It's not a game everyone can play.
You're at a disadvantage there. It's especially egregious for a woman to give death glares at a party. I would have enjoyed watching the pearl clutching you caused, though.
He brought me because he brought the entire Archive team and I think he might secretly be a bit of a sadist
Oh I caused pearl clutching from start to finish His exact quote was “I can’t believe I was more worried about bringing Daisy.” He should have known I’m very bad at high society
You know what that does sound like Elias… What a horrible thing to inflict on his investors My awkward unsocialised self
No Why would he do that when he could watch at least two of us flounder? I hope it was more fun watching Jonathan struggle through making nice with people than it was watching me
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bakerstreet2025-05-22 09:00 pm
Melanie King | The Magnus Archives
2. Whatever. I hate you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
3. You ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
4. How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
5. Can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism?
6. Wildcard! Text her!
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I’m pretty sure she thinks I’m working for the Tories and that’s why I called my boss evil
(For your American reference that would be like working for the Republicans)
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We paint ourselves yellow and our uniform is dungarees
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(I may have just googled how to speak Minion on my work computer, you’re welcome Elias)
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Might try it on Jon though
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Champagne is bad for that. Try picking a different drink if you can, next time.
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And I had to wear black tie.
It was terrible.
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But they do always have alternatives. You just need to ask for something appropriate. Whiskey, brandy, sherry... maybe even a martini.
If you want, next time you can bring me to help make it a bit more bearable. Assuming you didn't already have backup.
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Honestly if you don’t mind putting up with the toffs then yes
I thought it would be fine but apparently almost the entire rest of the team are good at schmoozing and the two who aren’t went and abandoned me
I’m going to spread a rumour they went off to make out in revenge
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Solid revenge.
I'll share a few tips for enduring them with minimal effort on your part, and some for getting out of terrible conversations.
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He told us all to behave and try to only drink three glasses and otherwise to “not embarrass him in any way, shape or form.”
Not entirely sure we managed as one of the investors tried to hit on me and I glared at him until he went away
Thank you
Everyone already thinks they’re a thing anyway
That would be great because apparently dead-eyed stares are not an appropriate strategy
Not sure what else he expected of me
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You're at a disadvantage there. It's especially egregious for a woman to give death glares at a party. I would have enjoyed watching the pearl clutching you caused, though.
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Oh I caused pearl clutching from start to finish
His exact quote was “I can’t believe I was more worried about bringing Daisy.”
He should have known I’m very bad at high society
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Did he not at least run through the basics with you all?
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My awkward unsocialised self
No
Why would he do that when he could watch at least two of us flounder?
I hope it was more fun watching Jonathan struggle through making nice with people than it was watching me