bakerstreet | like it's hard?

like it's hard?

guess my kink.

don't look now, but somebody slapped a button on you that reads "GUESS MY KINK." good thing Bakerstreet never backs down from any clashes of wits...and a chance to humiliate and be horny at the same time.

how do you do?
- comment with your info + prefs.
- replies will try to "match the kink to the face;" aka, they'll try and guess your character's kink/fetish.
- absolute madness reigns from here on out.
- this meme cannot be held liable for any fuckery, of the highest degree or otherwise.

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Yeah I didn't mean it in an extreme way. I meant it.... Pretty much like that.

[Based on what Steve has said, and just how he thinks he functions in this world.

Steve looks so embarrassed by it though. That part he's not so sure about.]

Women are really into that these days.

[ he wants to be more confident in what he wants but that 1940's religious guilt goes deep. steve's had trouble fitting into the modern age but none moreso than with the sexual liberation. ]

Yeah, they... are. [ he speaks from experience here. first time he was with someone since defrosting she took the lead and guided him. it felt nice. ] Makes things a little easier too, you know? Being told what to do.

[Bucky would like to think he's more open about it, but it still throws him all the time.

The leaps and bounds that have been made are also hopeful though. Hopeful to someone who has been pining for a very long time.]

Especially if your the one in charge all the time.

Something like that, yeah. [ steve smiles and nods his head. after being in the lead... as quickly as he'd taken to it, steve's still that kid from brooklyn sometimes. the one that followed instead of lead. ]

[ Bucky doesn't remember Steve ever really following. He was always the one with his fists up, leading the way, and Bucky was always the one trying to drag him away. Bucky looked up to him. Always followed him. He took his place next to Steve, but never in front of him. ]

I think that's okay. I mean- not that it matters what I think. Or that a kink isn't okay. I'm not even sure if that's a kink though. Is it?

[He can't believe this is a word he is now saying repeatedly.]

[ the world made steve feel small. insignificant. relevant only when bucky was around. he fought for his place at any table every single day. he had to or he'd be forgotten. now... he's known as a hero. the experience doesn't go away though.

sometimes steve wants to let someone else take over. he wants to relent to the commands of another. ]

I mean, it matters to me what you think. [ and it does. more than anything. ] I think so? I really... I've tried doing research on it but some of these websites are little too much for me.

[ Bucky knows Steve went through a lot when he was younger. He was always there by his side. Steve did it all with his head held high. Bucky thought of him as the strongest person he knew, long before the serum.

That's why this makes sense. ]

I think it's good to go after what you want.

[He nods at that, grasping Steve's shoulder.]

Same here, pal. I try not going on there as much as I can.

Yeah, s'why I'm trying. You know? Figure out what I want.

[ steve laughs because, he doesn't often feel old by todays standards but the sexual liberation of the 70's still still something he's grappling with. let alone the 80's and 90's. ]

You used to love all that tech stuff, [ steve says, remembering their final day in new york together. ] It's not so bad, I definitely like being able to research so easily.

That's good. You deserve to find what you want.

[Steve didn't stay with Peggy back in time. He's back here, and Bucky feels guilty about it. But if Steve can be happy in other ways, he wants to help him- even if he's not a part of it.]

The internet is.... it's a whole different kind of thing. The computers are great, the phones are incredible. It's the stuff inside that's weird.

You do too, you know.

[ steve stayed because the alternative was selfish. in a way he could never live with. and he didn't fight for bucky to leave him alone in a future they might never have had otherwise. ]

It can be weird, yeah but... We couldn't even dream of stuff like this back then. [ steve sees the use in it. even if it can be weird. ]

I think I'm good on that front. No kinks and things for me.

[He tries to say it jokingly, but he's not joking about that at all.]

Only in my scifi magazines. The crazy thing is, almost everything from those magazines is true now.

Doesn't have to be kinks, Bucky. You deserve someone in your life like that.

[ steve, true to form, takes it too literally and some how hits the nail on the head still. ]

Never thought we'd live to see that... But I'm glad we did. Despite... everything. I wouldn't want to do all this without ya, pal.

I uh.... I don't think that kinda thing is for me. Not anymore.

[He tried the whole dating app thing to try and move on, but- here they are.]

Real glad I don't have to do it without you either. And you know- that's good enough for me. Just being here with you.

There are a lot of good people out there, Buck. People who you might like, if you let 'em.

[ he doesn't like the idea of bucky being alone. i mean, he never will be because steve will be there. but what if steve finds someone? ]

Yeah? [ steve smiles softly. he won't ever leave bucky. ] Me too, actually.

It's complicated. And I know that sounds like bullshit, but it really is. I've got... A lot going on, you know?

[If anyone could possibly understand,it would be Steve. So why's it so hard to talk about even with him?

Well...maybe especially with him.]

Our movie nights are epic.

[He's learned that new word, are you proud of him?]

Look, I get it but... don't let that be an excuse for too long, you know? [ steve offers a smile. he does get finding yourself. he's doing that now. he's trying. they both are. ] Life's always gonna be busy and complicated but finding someone doesn't have to be something you avoid.

They are pretty... epic. [ steve lets the word sit for a moment. they're so modern, now. ] It's nice just to spend time together.

Edited 2025-05-28 00:33 (UTC)

I don't think it's meant for me, Steve. Not after everything. There are things that I... I don't know. I can't get past. And even if I could.... [He shrugs] I don't think the thing I want is gonna happen for me.

Spending time with you is the most important thing to me right now.

You can't say that, maybe the feeling will pass. Maybe things will change, [ ever the optimist, steve always has hope. especially when his friends don't. ] Nothing stays the same forever, right?

What do you want, Buck?

It's not just a feeling. It's- [he sighs, sitting back] Things that happen because of what they did to me. The nightmares, the dissociation. The way how sometimes all I want is to... be touched, but sometimes the thought of it makes my skin crawl. How can I put that on anyone?

I want...

[He can't. He knows he shouldn't. Not even Steve. Which is why he rethinks his next answer. He can't go there.]

I just want a peaceful life. I want us to get to know each other again.

[ steve reaches out and holds bucky's shoulder. he can only imagine how hard it is for him to deal with all the stuff hydra did to him. ]

The right person will be patient, Bucky. Love isn't just about what you can offer but what someone else is willing to offer in return. You don't know that someone won't accept all that if it means having you too. And you're pretty great, someone else will see that too.

[ steve waits patiently, let's bucky work through what he needs to work through. he knows he's holding back but he doesn't push. ]

Yeah? I think that's doable.

[ Bucky looks at Steve, leaning into that hold a little. There are so many things he wants to say- but he can't. He doesn't want to ruin things. Those words, though- they make him feel further away from happiness than he's felt in a while. He knows it won't happen for him. ]

Yeah, maybe. I guess we'll see. Anyway this is supposed to be about your thing, not mine.

[He tilts his head a little, looking at Steve.]

Then I'm good. I'm set.

Think we moved on from that a while ago. But if you're curious I'll answer the best I can but I'm still figuring all this out too. [ steve says with a shrug, because he is. he doesn't know what most of his feelings mean or where they come from or why. ]

[Steve's gotta have some handle on his feelings, doesn't he? He's been a person living out of the ice for a while now.]

Well I don't know how we moved on from that to me. You've got more experience with this lately than I do.

I don't know about more experience but I have been trying. [ he's gotten a few dates under his belt and he's even had sex. but anything more serious hasn't cropped up for him. ] I guess I just haven't been thinking about the whole kink thing, when did sex become this complicated?

More experienced lately. Since- you know. We both came back from the ice.

[Bucky hasn't been trying all that much. He doesn't think he can. He has a whole slew of problems he doesn't want to put on anyone. Especially ones who might not understand where he's coming from, or what's wrong. And then there's the other thing.]

It's good if you know you like it, though. It's good to know what you like.

I ask myself that every day. One thing leaves me more confused than the other.

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wearier - 2025-06-05 19:45 (UTC) - Expand

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