Teatster Sunday

[cuntryroads]

RATE THAT CHEST MEME

You know the "rate that ass" meme? Well, here's a meme that allows you to rate the opposite! This includes a man's chest, a woman's chest, even a treasure chest if you're really into that sort of thing. Just show it off and give a rating from 0 (the absolute worst!!) to 10 (HELL YEAH) and go from there. Simple as that! And make sure to have fun!

Comments

[pervy_inuyasha]

What a giant nerd..

I get it. Don't worry kid, I'm as incredible as--no--I'm more now that I think about it, so make sure you write this down! First and most important!

Dark Schneider is the most powerful, well-endowed, and sexually proficient magic user ever!

[stealerofsouls]

[He's been called worse so it's not a big deal.

Oh. Uh. Shoot. He doesn't have pen and paper so he pulls out his phone and starts typing rapidly.]

I see, I see...

[Which gives him an idea...]

Care to tell me your story then, sir? I could record all of your adventures, this way even more people will know of the most powerful and handsome warlock to ever exist.

[Yeah, he's feeding DS's ego because he's a nerd and finds him entertaining.]

... Surely you'd garner more women for it!

[pervy_inuyasha]

True. My manga is one of the best selling of all time.

Fine! You can never have too many women anyway..don't let anyone tell you different. Having a harem should be the goal of every hot-blooded male!

Write that down, too.

[stealerofsouls]

[Ryo chuckles sadly to himself even as he types that into his notepad.

Then there's a pause.]

What if... you don't want the women?

[pervy_inuyasha]

Then you'll die alone in a rusty old shack~!

[stealerofsouls]

Why's that?

[pervy_inuyasha]

It's the law of love. If you reach a level where multiple women want to pamper and pleasure you, then let em.

It's only right.

[stealerofsouls]

Can I skip that step and not live in a old shack?

[pervy_inuyasha]

[Kids these days.]

Only if you accept that they love you! Why stop them? I don't! I jump in the middle and crowd surf their curves until we're all satisfied!

[stealerofsouls]

[Ryo is an odd one.]

Because I have a...

[He siiighs and hangs his head.]

.. A fanclub and... I understand that they like me. I accept that. I'm simply not interested in that though.

[pervy_inuyasha]

[More for him, seems like. Ah, well. May as well ask.]

What the hell do you care about?

[stealerofsouls]

[DS can have them.]

Building dioramas, studying the occult, and writing stories.

[He'd like more genuine friends but... the Ring keeps Ryo isolated. So he'll keep quiet about it.]

[pervy_inuyasha]

[He's more than happy to! Especially if they're hot.]

The occult..

[DS sucks his own teeth with a soft "tsk" sound.]

None of that will help you get stronger. Screw around and you'll lose your own damn soul!

[stealerofsouls]

[Sigh. Another one. Everyone always warns him about that.]

I find it fascinating. I'm careful though.

[No, he's not. Hence the cursed item he's hiding.]

But I'm not strong... Not physically. I've never been...

[pervy_inuyasha]

[DS gets up and bops Ryo on the head.]

[stealerofsouls]

!!

[He clutches his head.]

Ow! What was that for...?!

[pervy_inuyasha]

Don't you read!?

No story ends with occult nonsense and cursed bullshit without some kind of repercussion!

[DS bends down some and leans in. His face takes on an ugly, twisted, insane sort of look ripped right out the panel of his beautifully drawn manga series.]

Unless you're already cursed?

[stealerofsouls]

I know b-but...!

[Oh how the Spirit would love to reveal himself dramatically right now but that would be absolutely reckless.

So he keeps quiet. Leave it to his landlord though to not want to hide him better.

Ryo looks nervous, avoiding DS's gaze.]

I... might be...

[pervy_inuyasha]

Idiot!

[DS grabs Ryo by the shirt, clutching right under the collar.]

I just met you and I already want to kick you in the ass until my foot falls off!

[The wizard releases Ryo and falls back into his seat.]

How long have you been dealing with it?

[stealerofsouls]

Ah!

[He's as light as a feather when DS picks him up. The boy stumbles back on to his bottom when let go, the slight jingling of metal(?) can be heard on him.]

I-I'm sorry... It's been about a year since...

[He trails off.]

... Why?

[pervy_inuyasha]

The curse could get stronger over time. Depends on what kind--yawn--I guess.

But you won't be getting bigger anytime soon. Keeping you weak means you gotta rely on it. A guy like me has no need for something an old hag would have to use.

[stealerofsouls]

[... He seems bored. Ryo can't help but frown, looking down at his chest.

Although the item in question jingles a bit again. Sharp, long shapes seem to graze past the fabric of inside the boy's shirt.

Seems the insult got through.]

... So... it's the item that's keeping me like this...

[He knew that. He just didn't like admitting it.]

Is there a way to... live in harmony with a curse...?

[pervy_inuyasha]

[This is simply the nature of Dark Schneider. He's actually listening closely enough, as Ryo tells more than he realizes.

Like living in harmony with a curse suggests some level of intelligence on the other side, for example. Or noticing reactions..]

Never heard of such a thing before. Sounds like it got you good. Probably too weak to curse powerful people.

[stealerofsouls]

[Ryo's unfortunately co-dependent on the thing now. Even when people try to take the Ring away from him, he finds a way to get it back. (Or the Ring somehow returns to him?)

The boy slowly rises to his feet and dusts himself off.]

It's...

[He pulls the cursed item from out of his shirt, letting the rather large medallion sit in his hands. Best to come forward about things.

The Spirit inside is not happy. But he's not stupid. So he's trying to mask his power as much as possible, making the Millennium Necklace seem like a trinket rather than a one of seven phylacteries to releasing Egyptian's Satan figure.]

... It chooses who wields it.

[pervy_inuyasha]

[Phylactery for Egyptian Satan, meet the Adam of Darkness.]

Chose you, huh? Want me to send it to a different dimension? That'll get it off your back.