bakerstreet | The Drunk Meme

The Drunk Meme

"I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly." - Winston Churchill

1. Drinking Games. You're at that special level of drunkenness where previously unimagined things start to sound like a good idea, like another drink. It's cool, I know this great game that will inevitably end with everyone involved being totally wasted. You play until... shit, what were the rules again?

2. Unsolicitied Advice. Oh man, you suddenly know the solutions to all of life's mysteries. All it took to figure it all out was half a pint of whiskey! It's time to tell all your friends how to fix the problems with their personal lives, whether they want you to or not.

3. Drunk Texting. Frankly, you can't IMAGINE why anyone wouldn't want to hear about how drunk you are right now. If only you could remember where the vowels are on this tiny keyboard. Drawing inspiration from TFLN is encouraged.

4. Tell them How you Really Feel. You lost some of your less important inhibitions three or four drinks ago, and it's time to tell it how it is! Time to hunt down the person you love, or possibly the person you hate, or even just the person you don't ACTUALLY despise, and bare your heart to them in a way that you'll almost definitely regret tomorrow morning.

5. Karaoke. Shot through the heart, and you're to blame! You give love... a bad... something...

6. Terrible Ideas. This is going to be so awesome, guys. I've got the skateboard, and I'm handcuffed to Steve... is the camera rolling? And who's lighting the fireworks?

7. Flirting. While all that booze may not have enhanced your charm, it certainly did wonders for your ego! Time to find all the hottest dudes and/or chicks in this place and make them swoon before your gin-powered charisma.

8. On the Streets. What better way to follow up a good bar run than by drunkenly wandering the streets in the middle of the night? There may be loud, embarrassing singing. There may be puking in the gutter. You may be completely lost, and not sure why that police officer is speaking Italian.

9. The Next Day. All that you took with you from last night's adventures was a blur of jumbled, confusing memories, a lampshade with googly eyes drawn on it taped to your head, and a brutal hangover. What exactly happened here? And who's that sleeping next to you?

Stolen and modified from memebells.

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It really helps if you use your words, lad. I'm too drunk to try reading your thoughts.

Well, that's the problem, see.

[ Ah, it would seem that today's first randomized effect is "being a total lightweight" because Robin is already getting a bit fuzzy. ]

There are no. Words. But I suppose lover will have to do.

I suppose. Well... I'm afraid I can't really give you any advice in that arena. I'd rather punch him in the face than kiss him and all.

That would be my problem. A lot of the time I do want to punch him. I just end up kissing him anyway.

[Ahh, new beer. Rhys takes a long drink.]

Punching is much less complicated.

[ Oh look, Rob's beer is all gone! How did that happen? Ah well, that just means he can have another one. ]

Probably would be if I didn't love the bastard.

[ Robin actually has difficulty saying that he loves Reynard to anyone but Reynard most of the time. Clear sign of drunface. ]

Getting that involved is a sure way to muddy things up.

[He will get them each a shot of whiskey this time, too.]

It wasn't on purpose.

[ Seriously Rhys, does he look stupid to you?

Well... he might now since nobody looks all that smart when they're drunk. ]

It never is. And it's never as funny as it should be, either.

[Which means he probably won't laugh at you about it. Probably.]

S'not fuckin' funny at all.

[ Wow, he is going to have the hangover of a century after this. ]

What sort of sad sack of shit loves a complete asshole for four thousand years? How is that even possible? Even if he gives the best blowjobs.

Probably the kind of sack of shit that would get ridiculous love songs written about it if anyone knew about them, you know. You could be famous. I hear they pay good royalties these days.

[Wow, he'd feel bad... but getting him drunk is kind of rewarding!]

I've written ridiculous love songs about us. But I don't think they'd get me famous.

[ Yep, seems like Rhys is hitting the jackpot with the entertainment value on drunken Rob. Sometimes it gets switched around so he gets the hangover first and then gets drunk, other times nothing happend at all, sometimes he gets violent, and so on and so forth.

At the moment, what seems to be the result is OHAI, MY FEELINGS, LET ME SHOW YOU THEM. ]

You never know what will sell these days, lad. [He claps his shoulder firmly.]

Anyway, I can't imagine what being in love with the fox is like. Must be... annoying.

[ You know what, he'll just come around so he can sit next to you, Rhys.

He leans a little on the other man with a mopey nod of agreement. ]

Get me drunk enough and I'll probably start singing some of them. At least when I'm this kind of drunk.

And it is annoying. Though on the other hand he hasn't died yet, and that's definitely a point in his favor.

[ Being cursed is happy fun times. ]

I'm sure the pub would happily listen to a round of songs. They're in that kind of mood.

[He pets his hair soothingly. And only a little bit flirtatiously.]

Ah, that is a good thing. Better to fall in love with someone who won't be as a mayfly, et cetera.

[ A little bit flirtatiously is absolutely fine and dandy with Rob. ]

Yeah, and the curse doesn't seem to get much at him. Maybe because he's kind of a curse himself. Just one that gives spectacular head.

Don't remind me.

[That asshole.]

You know, I should probably feel all growly and jealous to hear you say that but I am way too drunk and you're being nice to me so I'm not gonna bother with it.

That's fine. I didn't ask him for it, anyway.

And you sure don't seem happy about having gotten it.

I'm not. That bastard.

What'd he do? I mean... how'd you even end up in a... a... position to get an involuntary blowjob?

Some sort of spell. Which, being him, he took full advantage of.

[he is needing more whiskey now. Thanks.]

Oooooh. That one happened to us too.

[ Have a grin, Rhys. ]

To him.

[That makes him laugh before he downs his whiskey.]

I hope you had fun.

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faeconman - 2012-03-13 08:08 (UTC) - Expand

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