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[littleredsock]

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steph rogers (r!63) | mcu | ota

[dysmorphics]

1. I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So he's here and he brought a kazoo.
2. Of course I can handle you at your worst. That's basically all the time.
3. It's Friday and I'm retired. Let's do some "we shouldn't be doing this" things.
4. We either need to talk about what happened right now, or pretend it never happened at all. Which is it?
5. Is there a term for people who are only attracted to those who deeply frustrate them?
6. [ text her! castmates, aus, crosscanon, ocs, assumed cr, all welcome. ]

2

[ricochetingbullets]

And I am so very grateful you do. To be fair, I did warn you when we met what you were getting yourself into by letting me hang around.

[dysmorphics]

Yeah, you did, and that helped. Plus I have experience dealing with difficult people. [ You know, between her formerly brainwashed assassin best friend, and the rest of the Avengers. ]

So what exactly do you need me to handle tonight?

[ricochetingbullets]

Well, things are going from bad to worse right now, so I've possibly already committed a few felonies. Think you can help me out?

5.

[pilfeline]

I don't know but now I'm deeply disappointed since you're always telling me how sweet I am.

[dysmorphics]

Yeah, you're sweet, but I know you're keeping secrets and that's the frustrating part.

[pilfeline]

I'm afraid I can't stop keeping secrets now that I know that's what gets you going. Sorry not sorry.

3; I couldn’t resist, given the thing you made LOL

[notworthallthis]

You’re ALWAYS doing things you shouldn’t be doing.

How about we do the boring thing for once and just stay home?

which was your fault anyway LOL also i stuck it into her profile bc 😂

[dysmorphics]

Is this your way of inviting me to move in?

😇 hahaha PERFECT

[notworthallthis]

[He is suddenly very glad this is happening over texts because his fumble at her question is missed because in texts, she can’t see the way he practically stutters with his face before he says: ]

If it will make you stay at home, maybe it is.

[He doesn’t even know why it threw him off so much; they’d lived together before. It wasn’t such a crazy thought.

Though there is a difference in living with your best friend and living with the girl you’re dating. He just… happens to have to potential to be doing both in this particular case?]

2

[ceptme]

this is easy mode
be glad you didn't know me ten years ago

[dysmorphics]

I'm afraid to even ask.

So what are we up to tonight that I have to "brace myself"?

[ceptme]

just passing on what I got told
apparently Stark's throwing a halloween party

[there's a pause before the next messages come through]

follow up question
what's halloween

1

[hosannas_of_anguish]

Wow, I can almost smell his desperation from here.

Kazoo, he could have at least tried for harmonica, or a triangle.

[dysmorphics]

Now he's playing some weird tune. He's starting to attract attention. What do I do?

[ Next time, she's just going to say she's unavailable, full stop. Trying to be nice apparently bites you in the ass sometimes. ]

[hosannas_of_anguish]

Okay, so three options. One, tell him you are not interested. Short and sweet. Second, humiliate him, yell you are his sister and he is disgusting. The crowd's reaction will set terror and embarrassment into him. If he still comes onto you after that, kick him in the balls.

2

[3490]

I'd be annoyed if you weren't right.

[dysmorphics]

Now that that's out of the way, what's the plan?

3

[pissant]

ooooh
like what???
~you got my interest~

[dysmorphics]

I don't know, what do cool young people do these days? Is it too early for Halloween parties?

[pissant]

oh i have NO idea
but i do know it is NOT too early for a Halloween party
we could totally pick up some costumes by that place by the Strand
and show up at one

4

[experimentally]

I've always been a solid proponent for Option B. Worked out pretty well so far.

[ spoiler: it has actually never worked out well. ]

[dysmorphics]

You sure? I'm a good listener.

5, oops and this probably falls in line with the more canon-y one i haven't gotten back to yet lmfao

[bionicstaringmachine]

You find out what it is, you tell me. The only one I'm coming up with is masochist.

[dysmorphics]

Yeah, that sounds about right.

Why am I like this?