bakerstreet | The Hangover Meme

The Hangover Meme

The Hangover Meme

Last night was amazing. Or maybe it was terrible. Maybe you can't actually remember. Whatever happened, you definitely drank waaaaay too much last night. Now, in the harsh, harsh light of day, you have to face the decisions you've made. Or not, you can always just lie in bed for the whole day and refuse to move. That works too.

The Rules

1) Post your top comment with preferences!
2) Roll a RNG to find your prompt!
3) Reply to other top comments!

The Prompts

1) The One With the Tiger: You've woken up in someplace you don't remember being. Someone's missing a tooth. There's a tiger in the bathroom. Someone's baby is here? Or maybe you've woken up in a room full of half naked people where a rager clearly occurred. What the fuck happened? And why is there blood on your shirt?

2) The 'Nam Flashbacks: You initially wake up without any idea of what you did last night, but it' s coming back to you in horrifying visions. Oh god. No. Make it stop.

3) Kill Me Just Kill Me I Accept the Void: You wake up feeling like the Grim Reaper himself is sitting on your back playing a drum solo with your skull. You're probably on the bathroom floor. You promise yourself you'll never drink again, but we all know that's a lie.

4) Be Functional: Everything is terrible. You might throw up, the light bulb is enough to make you shrink back like a vampire, and you sat in the shower for twenty minutes and cried. But now you have to be up and awake and function like a person. Do you have a job? Or a secret mission to do? Too bad, now you gotta do it while slowly dying inside.

5) The Two Day Affair: You actually didn't drunk too much last night! But, you did the other night, and you're being punished for it. This hangover has gone on over a full day now, because you probably deserve this.

6) Waking Up In Vegas: It's like the one with a tiger, but now you're married! Surprise! Try not to vomit on your new spouse while you work this out.

7) Somebody Call the Po-lice: You've woken up in a jail cell. Maybe you remember getting here, maybe you don't. But now you've got to get out somehow, legally or otherwise, while a tiny man jackhammers the inside of your brain.

8) The Unique Cure: Everyone's got their own weird cure for a hangover. Grease, or a long run, of more alcohol. Or maybe this time you're trying some bizarre new cure that someone else swears in and down works. Raw egg? Okay, sure. If it stops the pain.

9) Still Drunk: You wake up great! You're a little wobbly, but that's okay! Life is good! Wait. You're, uh. You're still drunk, buddy. Shit.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only | Expand All

[he'll be the one nursing the person with the hangover. Or picking them up from jail. Or whatever shenanigans he's having to clean up after. Go nuts, he can handle it. Open to canonmates as well as cross-canon/medium.]

[Lance has had quite a few times of learning a lesson in space--and one has always been 'stop running off with pretty alien girls'. He's around three for three on hijinks gone wrong, as their trip landing on a peaceful planet had him roaming off on a small ship space quest with a girl who spared him five minutes of his time. He's pretty sure he held her hand at some point, but he'd had one too many space cocktails (who cared if he was underage? He was a paladin!) and the joyride had led him back to one end of the planet.

To which they'd warped a half dozen times with space girl's friends, ended up getting chased by Galran forces at some point, and he recalls running into her dad, and also running from her dad. But he doesn't quite remember... how he ended up on the side of this cliff. He remembers having seen it--well, from what it looked like, on the other side of the cliff near civilization, but this... this is definitely a tree. He's tangled in the branches and vines, woozy and still feeling completely as gone as he was yesterday but only with added hiccups and overwhelming nausea.

With a groan, he lifts one uncoordinated hand to his head and tries to turn on his communicator system.]

Um... guys? L'il help here? I'm uh... [He hiccups.] I'm in some sorta tree. I think? Somethin'. Shiro? You here, man? Any'n?

[He should have know better.

He should have really, really know better. Shiro started berating himself for it the moment Lance didn't turn up for check in and so far the mental exercise hadn't stopped. A new planet and friendly girls. He shouldn't have ever let the pilot out of his sight to begin with.

At least this time Blue was still been in his bay.

Because, yes, Shiro had checked.

It isn't as if he's going to let his squad-mate just disappear though and so Shiro is probably about half-way to the finding the father point of tracking down Lance's adventure when he hears the comm in his helmet crackle to life.

It's an equal tear between 'oh thank God' and 'I am going to rip him a new one' through his mind in the same instant. He slows the speeder he's on down and pulls over to the side of the dusty what-passes-for-a-road, dropping one foot down to brace it. It's a local piece but its basic enough he could borrow it without having to go back to the castle for a better ride. Now he wonders if he should call in reinforcements or not. Luckily their suits have tracers in them and he waits for his helmet display to ping up if anyone in the castle heard the transmission too. His voice doesn't give away anything but calm though as he answers.]

This is Shiro. Are you hurt?

Edited 2016-07-29 17:18 (UTC)

[Lance, who would've kept going with his consistent calling for someone until he heard a voice, is only stopped for a moment to take a breath when his head spins, and he wonders for a moment if he's just hearing things. But the sound in his helmet isn't to be mistaken, and he grins. Yes!]

Shiro!

[He's glad to hear his voice. Once rescued, he may regret it a little, having done nearly everything he did that night and also having not asked Hunk to help smuggle him back in, but from where he is right now, from what this is, he just appreciates having the assistance. Shiro's question gets completely brushed aside.]

Probably not? I dunno, I mean, still feelin' kinda like how I was yesterday 'n all with Shasni, but s'not important! Shiro, I'm stuck! [After all, Lance has bigger things to worry about. He's struggling to comprehend how his own body is properly feeling at the moment, still too lightheaded from the effects of the drink.]

R-remember yesterday, when we were near that cliff thin' and you were like 'you's gonna fall off if y'get too close', 'n stuff? [He does his best imitation of Shiro, and the slur in his voice gets only more prominent as he tries to speak quickly. He hiccups again.] Well, uh. Should'a listened, didn't listen, but look, man. You're, uh... you're tall! An' you're my hero. You can get me outta this thing, right?

[So... not hurt. At least not very badly if all the talking and no whimpers of pain was any indication. Though Shiro's eyebrows do go up a little at the 'imitation' of him. And then a little bit more as the location registers.

Oh for the love of - ]

You're on the cliff? [A ping and locator show up on the display of his helmet just as he asks it, as if confirming and he can all but hear the princess for all she doesn't actually cut in on the conversation relay.] Are you secure?

Because he's already turning the speeder around and heading back in the right direction. He'd say they were going to have a serious talk after this was done - but he suspects it would be a little like telling a puppy not to chase a shiny new ball. Perhaps belatedly he adds:]

Yes. I'm going to get you out of there.

Well, not on it anymore. But yeah, secure as I can be... I'm stuck, just said that!

[He's quite securely stuck in the vines, and his own wiggling to try and free himself only proves to keep his legs tangled in them. Thankfully, the cliff wasn't too far, and with the amount of vines and branches there to catch him, he's merely got a few dozen bruises and a small scrape on the left side of his face. Were he able to properly focus on his movements, he'd be able to free himself rather easily, but all of his wiggling and struggling only proves to confuse him further. He really isn't too far off the ground from his final entanglement that caught his fall, but to him, ten feet is practically a thousand.

Shiro's promise just gets him a sigh in relief.] Thanks, man. I owe ya one--no, no I owe you like--aw shit, shit, I'm gonna--urk!!

[And in a scramble to turn himself around, he manages to cut off his mic before he begins to lose a portion of last night's dinner. It'll save anyone listening at least a bit of gross. At least he manages to aim downward and not on himself, though he leans in the tree at a strange angle and does his best impression of playing dead. He can already feel the regret.]

[Lance likes to talk. A lot. So its reassuring to Shiro when he rambles on - and on. It means that he's all right even if he's in a bit of a bind. The 'shit' gets his attention though and he's just starting to worry - because there are so many ways being near a cliff can be a bad thing when he hears an opening sound he's more used to hearing from Hunk -

and the comm shuts off. Maybe that should alarm him but really - he's just kind of grateful.

Shiro reaches the cliff in short order and parks the speeder, swinging off of it and flexing his knees for just a second to make sure his balance is completely back. If he's doing to be standing on the edge of a huge drop, balance is important.

It's a long cliff. Shiro stands at the edge and looks down. He'd really like to be wrong about the assumption he's making. Hoping Lance has still got his receiver working - and is capable of answering, he asks:]

I'm going to need you to give me a sign of where you are, Lance.

[Taking a few moments just to catch his breath, he just tries to listen in for ships. Outside of the rustle of nature and the period sound in his ear, he can't hear anything. No animals, no water... just him, and these trees. It seems too surreal to him, and he almost spaces out just thinking about it.

Again. He'd learned a lot about just listening to space that night. Just thinking on it again has him fondly smiling as he thinks about her.

But his Walden-inspired moment is cut short when he hears Shiro speaking to him again, and he turns his mic back on.]

How'm I s'posed to.... wait a minute. Look for my signal, 'kay?

[It hits him just then that he can fire a signal. He still can't move himself out, but he has his Bayard, which he pulls off and summons. As the gun form in his hand, he grunts softly as he repositions himself to lean back, propping the gun against his side. He aims directly upward and fires a shot into the trees--and yelps when a few small branches and clumps of leaves fall into his face.]

Shit! Damn it, leaves! Ack...

[ But his shot clarifies one key piece of information: he's definitely down there, not too far from cliff's side but definitely nestled into the forest below. He's not making it easy on you, dad.]

[oh for the love of -

It's the second time in a very short amount of ticks, that exact thought has gone through Shiro's mind. Because he sees where the blast came from and - Lance really is making him work for this one, isn't he?

And yet - he feels a certain surge of relief as well. Because that cliff is a long way down and if Lance fell that distance before hitting the trees...

Shiro's told himself he accepts the fact that his team is going to get hurt. That they could get killed despite his best attempts to stop it. He knows he hasn't really accepted that fact but he tries to remember it. And a fall like that -

The leafy sputtering afterward has him exhaling a little, lips lifting the smallest bits on their edges and he drops down to start lowering himself over the side of the cliff. Sure, there's a way down but its miles to the north and that blast came from the south and there are jet packs in his armor. A little bit of careful maneuvering and he's sure he can make it down without risking too much.

How did Lance even end up down there?]

I'm coming to get you. Hold on.

[Sadly, it's beconing Lance's M.O. to cause as much grief as possible. He does his best when it's time to focus, when it's time to work, but his off days have always been a bit... special. Or terrible. He has too many ideas, too many thoughts that things will work in his favor, and too many chances that it doesn't.

He's just glad he has such a good support system of people willing to help him out when he's messed up so royally. He appreciates his friends at this time, willing to find him and bail him out of his unlucky circumstances. He'll owe Shiro something, at some point. He already owes him a lot, but he'll think of something bigger, something better than just a "thank you for saving my ass again". When he's sober, he'll think on it more. Unfortunately, in the meantime, Shiro will be subjected to a slew of rambling.]

Thanks, man. Shiro, Shiro you're great. Like more than great. The best. I'm just gonna hang out here 'til you show. Like a... goose? Izzit a goose? Forgot what ma used t'say, but... some bird. Some squawky noisy thing.

[He hiccups again.]

Y'know... I think I'm still kinda all kinds of wobbly. Maybe that's why my legs don't work right, you know? Because I'm still feelin' it, like all of it. My legs all acting weird, that's how I fell. I think... Shiro, 'm I in love?

[Shiro supposes he could turn off his comm to keep Lance's ramblings from distracting him while he's making his descent but in truth - at this point, the silence would be more distracting than the familiar patter of his teammate's talk. So Shiro listens to it with half an ear and works his way down the side of the cliff with a mix of handholds, short drops and concessional spurts of his rocket pack. The cliff isn't sheer by any means and its easy enough to get down if you pay attention. Shiro's balancing on a small ledge and a hand hold, just judging his next short drop (and whatever Lance drank hopefully isn't alien enough to mess with his muscle or nerves enough to do permanent damage) when:]

No. No, you're not in love, Lance. You're drunk.

Drunk? Ehhh?

[Lance figures it makes sense. He's never had enough human alcohol to see his own actual levels of intoxication, but from his extensive history of pop culture and terrible television dramas, it seems to line up. It's enough that he just takes Shiro's words as a full explanation, and he sighs softly, almost dream-like. He still remembers his ragtag bunch of company from last night, and how amazed that a girl with no discernable irises and strange head-tentrils could still fall under his standards of beauty. Some earth celebrities had nothing on the girls he's been running into in space--either that or he's discovered some interesting things about himself, he's not sure what's worse.]

Sucks that it's not love. Shasni was real pretty. Like, y'know, even with the weird hair things. And her dad kinda wantin' to kill me now... Tried playin' the whole 'defendin' he universe' card and he told me I was gonna cause the apopa--ap... cop-a-list... no... --okay, whatever that word is. I was gonna make their planet blow up in aliens 'n stuff if we hooked up so he was just gonna kill me and man, Shiro. He was like thirty feet tall--oh... hold up.

[And with that, he lets out another hiccup, followed by a soft groan. He's thankful for his positioning where he is, because he manages to lay his head back down on the branch for a bit of relief.] Feel like... not good. Last night felt kinda like a good decision, can't tell if I'm regrettin' it or not. [But he might later. He probably will, once it begins working its way completely out of his system again.]

[Pop culture and terrible television dramas are the only acceptable way to measure real life experiences.

And one of these days, Lance's easy heart with the girls was going to get them all in trouble.

In more trouble.

Again.

But Shiro really didn't know how to reign it in and he really wasn't sure reining it in was the right thing to do anyway. Lance's easy heart was actually an asset. Or it could be, more, as Lance got older. Lance befriended people - beings - easily and his gregarious nature was a good thing to have in a universe of new beings. He was also a damn good pilot when he forget to show off and focused. They were gifts Shiro could see him growing into as he got older and more experience and so Shiro really couldn't see trying to tamp down on them now.

Just - a little more discretion would have been nice. Just from time to time at least.

Shiro made the final drop to the ground and started in the direction of Lance's signal. It shouldn't be too far.]

How about you make that final decision on whether you regret it or not once the alcohol wears off. Do you remember how you ended up in a tree?

[Discretion and Lance would have a long bonding journey ahead. He'll reflect on it once he's able, probably after any lecturing and yelling, after his own stubborn attitude tells him he's fine before he admits to himself that he was a reckless idiot. Again.

But it's okay. That all comes later, away from the smitten cloud he's found himself in, where he almost misses hearing Shiro speaking again from thinking too much about the strange alien girl. It really had been a fun night. He'll come back to that statement and hums for a moment, trying to remember his night went before the cliff. A ton of random gaps, he isn't quite sure how he made it back to this part of the galaxy.]

I think... I got dropped off? Was gettin' a ride from uh.... I 'unno, some friend she had, real cool dude, and we avoided some flyin' meteors. Then uh... somethin' else happened, ended up back by the cliff. Then looked down and, like... fell? I 'member hittin' a tree, that kinda hurt some, I--I remember that! Then... I woke up? Think that's it. And 'ere we are!

[Shiro truly is his hero. Instead of just being a person he's idolized from a distance, he's become his first line of defense, his mentor, the one he's relied on the most even throughout the start of their journey as the paladins. It has him smiling, knowing that even after falling off a cliff and getting himself tangled in here, he's got Shiro to look up to. He doesn't want to burden him, and he doesn't plan on being this useless forever, but it's a warm feeling. It makes him chuckle softly--which immediately follows a groan, as the pressure on his stomach did not go well with his uneasy insides.]

Shiro, you're... tha best. The bestest best. I'm... I'mma get you a cake. A space cake, or somethin'--some of 'em taste kinda like chocolate. You like chocolate?

[Granted, he isn't sure exactly how much he really expects intel-wise from Lance on how he ended up where he is. He might remember more later but right now he's sounding pretty hazy on things. Which might be a good thing because he's certainly not panicking or making things harder. Still - Shiro frowns at what he does hear. Maybe its just his nature but he thinks it might sound a little as if Lance might have been pushed.

Or just gotten vertigo and fallen off the side of the cliff himself and Shiro acknowledges silently that that's as much a possibility as a push helping him along. Either way - he's damn lucky didn't get hurt or worse and Shiro thinks that from now on when they're on alien planets he might have to make sure someone keeps a better eye on Lance.

It would cripple Voltron to lose the other pilot - but it would hurt Shiro even more.

The effusion brings a wry smile to his lips and he stops under the tree he can now hear Lance from both the comm and in real time.]

I like chocolate. It's been - a long time since I've had any. [It brings back a spark, a short memory flash, of sitting in his cell, cold and aching and heart-sick, and trying to remember all the little things he missed that he used to take for granted. He shakes it off with an exhale and focuses.] All right. I'm here. I'm going to come up the tree and get you now. If you can, hold on to something steady in case I shake anything on the way up.

[So their dearest captain likes chocolate. Lance makes a note to remember that, which he thinks he might be able to at this point of mind. He's used to remembering weird little things about his team, something he's used to doing from home. From dealing with siblings, it's always been good to know who needs something, who's going to get in trouble with their mom at home, little things to note for those too stubborn to say what they wanted for Christmas... Shiro liking chocolate is a good thing to note. With Hunk's creativity in the kitchen, he'll have to ask. Especially for Shiro, since he rarely asks for anything. Always the one who takes care of the team... Lance really wants to remember this.

Well, when he's out of the tree. He will definitely ask when he's no longer trapped forever. When he hears Shiro's voice, he looks around--trying to find him in the branches, before realizing why the older Paladin speaks of climbing the tree.

Oh. Because he's on the ground.

Lance looks down and gives him the biggest, dopiest smile he can muster. He's just so happy to see him there.]

I'm saaaved! Shiiroooo, you're my favorite!

[Looking around for something to hang on to, he finds a smaller branch just a few inches up and reaches over to hang onto it--which he merely flops onto, trying to wrap his arms underneath it to keep his balance. The sky spins unsteadily for a second, and he just sighs, leaning his head on it.] Man... I'm real messed up.

[Aaaaand - there's Lance's face, peering down through a break in the branches. At least it pinpoints exactly where he is -

and Shiro probably should feel the relieved and slightly crooked grin move across his face - but he does. Lance is saved. Again. Reaching up, Shiro hooked a hand over a low branch.]

I won't tell Hunk you said so - but thanks. [Everyone is Lance's favorite at some point or another. It's still hard not to enjoy that kind of effusion, especially when it really is entirely sincere. With a grunt, he hauls himself up and starts the climb to reach the other pilot. It doesn't take too much time, though he's a bit bulky in his armor and he's trying to be careful not to shake any of the branches supporting Lance. When he finally gets on level with him - his eyebrows go up. That's - a lot of vines.]

Real messed up is an understatement. Do you remember what you were drinking was called?

[Because, reaching out with his tech hand, activating it so that the vines tear easily without much jarring tugging, Shiro is pretty sure he's going to make a rule against any of the team drinking it in the future.]

[Lance is just all smiles as he waits for Shiro to make his way up. There's just something about Shiro's presence that just brings calm and reassurance, and seeing him there, knowing that he's already here and ready to help Lance get the hell out of this tree, eases every mild worry he had the ability to have. (It isn't much, not with his current level, but it's something.)]

Uh... it was... Galran-somethin', from what they named it. Not like... from 'em but like... funny. [He hiccups, but finds himself startled when Shiro's mechanical hand cuts through the vines. Lance moves back a foot, finding himself completely amazed that it's finally free.]

Whoa... whoa! Shiro... Shiro, you diiiid it. That's my foot!

[And on trying to wiggle his foot, far too pleased by it, he loses his balance and almost slides off. His hands scramble for holding onto the branch again.] Shit, no! Shiro, I'mma... [And then he pales for a second.] I gotta throw up.

[Maybe Koran will know what type of booze it was. Shiro hopes so. Because its definitely getting banned.

And then Lance is slipping and Shiro automatically grabs for the freed foot and - ]

Turn your head. Over side the side!

[Lance is quick to obey instructions, turning his head to face the side of the tree. And with his grasp weakly still gripping onto the vines, he proceeded to continue to empty the contents of his stomach. It lasts only for a few short minutes, but when he finishes, he finds himself groaning and glancing back at Shiro.]

'S like Hunk... all space sick 'n stuff. Except... I'm not goin' anywhere.

[He sits up and reaches a hand for Shiro, hoping for help out of this tree.]

[What follows is - colorful. And has Shiro wincing in sympathy. He's got no desire to now but he remembers when he first graduated and he and all his friends went out for a bender. Because that was what 'adults' did to celebrate their new adulthood.

Or something.

It hadn't ended well and Shiro had sworn off ever doing anything that stupid again. Even now the memory of the morning after and how miserable it felt was enough to make his stomach pinch.

So he gingerly shifted forward, trying not to move the branches too much but enough to keep a hand on the back of Lance's chest plate armor in case the vines or the tree decided to give way.

Not that he didn't deserve it but seeing Lance miserable was nothing that Shiro enjoyed.]

It'll be a little better now. Getting it out of your stomach is a good step forward. I'll still see if Koran has any painkillers once we get back. We should get you hydrated too. [His voice was low, just a soothing rumble as he caught Lance's reaching hand and helped him closer.] Think you can get on my back? I can get us down faster that way.

[Lance relaxes a little at Shiro's words. He's sure made a mess of things, and he's certain he just puked a goddamn rainbow, but he's glad it's over. Well, mostly over. He still feels insanely light-headed and off-kilter, but he can feel Shiro's secure grip on his arm and he's certain they'll get back just fine.

He looks at Shiro, then at his back, then takes a deep breath. His coordination isn't that bad (yes, it is) that he can't maneuver that.]

Sure can, cap'n! Just don't wanna hurl on you too... cuz I had a lot more 'n just that.

[Once close enough, he flops over against Shiro, throwing an arm around his shoulders. He's probably going about this piggyback process all wrong, but... he's trying.]

[The threat of even more vomit isn't lost on Shiro and his eyes widen before narrowing in a wince.

The things he does for his team.

It's okay though. They're worth it. And Lance's cheerful willingness to try even though he's so completely off the mark are just a reminder of why. So he shifts around himself until he's got the other paladin in position and then hooks Lance's arms around his shoulders.

This would be easier if he could just toss Lance over his shoulder but - that's not only just asking to leave a trail of puke behind them but it would be murder on the other pilot's head and possibly blacking out. So - piggy back it is even if Shiro isn't sure if Lance is going to manage to hang on on his own very well. It's a long trip back to the top of the cliff and the speeder but maybe he can get Black to touch down somewhere around here and save them both a whole lot of time.

First things first. Getting them both out of the tree. One final sweep to make sure there aren't any hidden vines attached to yank Lance back as Shiro starts moving and then Shiro starts working his way down the tree, holding Lances wrists in front of him with one hand and using the other to maneuver.

Without the jet pack's help it turns into more of a controlled drop. Shiro, knowing he'll regret it, still makes sure he lands on the bottom. A little winded he still manages:]

Try to puke to the side -

[Lance grimaces a little as they move. He feels as though he's reached his current quota of sickness for the time being, there's no telling how unlucky Shiro may end up before the afternoon. Lance wills himself to hold back while he ends up on Shiro's back, hanging on weakly.

But this much movement brings a jolt of pain along the left of his abdomen, and his hands clench into fists. As he attempts to hiss in pain, he hiccups in the same move, and he yelps, trying to tug one hand away to hold onto his side.]

Shit... Shiro... think I broke somethin'... [And he hiccups, then follows it with a gasp. He drops his head on Shiro's shoulder. He's had an epiphany.]

Oh, oh, Shiro! King's Piss!

[Getting Lance back into position once they're on the ground takes up enough enough of Shiro's concentration that he almost doesn't catch that something's up with Lance until he yelps. That has his eyes going a little wide and he twists his head a little to try to look over his shoulder, hoping he's not rewarded with a face full of vomit.

Broken? That's not good.

That's not bad either though. At least not as bad as it could be. Its obviously not life threatening. And - it really does make sense, if Lance fell that far. Even his luck can only hold just so far.

His eyebrows hitch.]

Hang on. I'm calling in Black. We'll be back at the castle in no time.

... what's king's piss?

The Hangover Meme

Shiro | Voltron: LD

1/9: calling one dad rescue

one dad rescue on the way - and boy, are you grounded young man

dad no this hangover will be punishment enough!

don't make him drag space mom into this (or crazy space uncle)

no because then he'd be like... triple grounded, and poisoned! dad no!

alternative is that he have to do his and keith's chores for the week

I'll take Space Parents for 600, Alex

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(no subject)

good place to wrap it up?

Sounds good! Thanks for playing with me :)

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