apoplexy: (Default)
apoplexy ([personal profile] apoplexy) wrote in [community profile] bakerstreet2015-07-04 02:54 pm

The BDSM Lifestyle Meme

The BDSM Lifestyle Meme

BDSM isn't all about the sex. Sure, handcuffs, whips and chains, toys, power and control-play can be fun, but sometimes it's about the other stuff too. The little stuff. The ways you and your partner give yourselves to each other every day.

So this is a meme to play out safe, sane, consensual and maybe even non-sexual BDSM.


If you want more information, check out:
          The Ten Golden Rules of BDSM Negotiation
          Sexuality.Org's BDSM Index
          The Keys to A Relationship
          Extreme Restraints

Be warned: Threads and prompts below may contain triggers, and will contain sexual content.

THE EVERYDAY:
  1. feeding: using him as a plate? having her kneel and accept hand-feeding? maybe someone's been very good and should have a tasty reward.
  2. bathing: after all, you have to take care of your partner. it's nice to have someone to get lotion in those hard-to-reach places.
  3. talking/therapy: how are you going to work out this relationship? what obstacles do you have to overcome?
  4. massage: some intimate relaxation.
  5. dates: it's good to go out every once in a while.
  6. negotiation: to work out what kinks are and are not okay.
  7. nonsexual bondage: gags, bridles, chastity belts. some people just like the security of bondage in everyday life.
  8. humiliation/in public: take your pet out to show her off; bend him over a bench and spank him for bad behavior.
  9. animal play: pony play, pet play.
  10. punishment/discipline: someone's been bad. maybe it's time for a time-out. or maybe someone has to clean the bathroom with a toothbrush.
  11. other
THE SEXUAL:
  1. the light stuff: some handcuffs, some ropes. nothing too extreme. maybe one partner or the other is afraid; maybe it's just time to take a break from the trappings and have some love-making.
  2. bondage: chains, or elaborately knotted ropes, or full-body bindings. maybe even suspension in midair.
  3. caning/whipping/spanking: for punishment and for enjoyment of the pain.
  4. shaving: you like them with smooth skin. no beards, no lovetrail, no hairy legs.
  5. piercing/tattooing: a permanent mark of devotion.
  6. sensory deprivation: gags, blindfolds, earplugs, to shut out the rest of the world.
  7. as therapy: exploring a past trauma or fear.
  8. first time: one partner or another is experiencing the kink lifestyle for the first time.
  9. kink parties: for casual play. mind the rules; drugs and alcohol are rarely tolerated, and all play must be consensual. or else the host or hostess might get angry.
  10. orgasm denial/forced orgasm: until they beg for it, or beg you to stop.
  11. ageplay: perhaps someone wants to be treated like a child. maybe a little daddy or mommy kink to go along with it.
  12. role-play: taking on roles. master-slave, teacher-student, dragon prince and slave-dancer -- your imagination's the limit.
  13. genital torture: pain where you're the most sensitive.
  14. electricity: to give things a spark.
  15. medical fetish: sounding, stirrups, speculums -- oh, doctor.
  16. fucking machines: it'll keep in the same rhythm, no matter how much you beg.
  17. other
Please do NOT leave your comment blank! (Blank comments will not be deleted, but we highly recommend that you post something.) Either write a note on desired kinks/undesired kinks or create a scenario or fill out the textarea below:

Source credit: [personal profile] memesnthings

Dorian Pavus // Dragon Age: Inquisition

[personal profile] mallefunction 2015-07-04 02:17 pm (UTC)(link)
[Canon M/M is preferred. Fine with everything but 1, 2, 7, 8, 9 for the non-sexual. Everything except 4, 5, 11, 13, and 15.]
formerself: (cut off)

Gary 'Eggsy' Unwin | Kingsman: The Secret Service | OTA

[personal profile] formerself 2015-07-04 03:30 pm (UTC)(link)
BRIEF CHARACTER DESCRIPTION: Semi-reformed petty criminal turned Bond-esque superspy. For the purposes of this meme: occasionally bratty, tryhard submissive. Has an eagerness to please which may sometimes infringe on personal comfort.
SEEKING: Cross-canon, canonmates, I'm easy. I tag in prose and find prose tags easier to read, but I'm not super fussy about it.

KINKS
YES: Anything not mentioned below, I am up for. The 'maybe' pile is basically 'yes, but let's talk about it first'. Equally interested in the sexual and nonsexual prompts.
NO: Age play, genital torture, medical fetish
MAYBE: Public, piercing/tattooing, kink parties, electricity, animal play
rickitikitarr: (call me darling)

nonsexual 6

[personal profile] rickitikitarr 2015-07-04 03:45 pm (UTC)(link)
"Darling," Ricki says, one afternoon, in a shared hotel in Jakarta, on a searingly hot day, the cheap little air conditioner clicking desperately away behind the closed curtains, "it occurs to me that it might be time to have a longer conversation about some of the things we've been winging our way through."

Because as wonderful as the casual encounters have been, and as much as they've discussed the individual acts in extensive detail, there are some things that will probably work better if they are actually said. He circles a thumb around the bruise he's bitten onto Eggsy's bare hip, and wishes it weren't too hot to curl closer.

"I'm sensible of the fact that we're not exactly dating, and that promises are a bit of a laugh in our line of work, but there are still some things I'd like to ask you."

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zen_en_vert: (Default)

Bruce Banner: MCU: OTA

[personal profile] zen_en_vert 2015-07-04 04:15 pm (UTC)(link)
BRIEF CHARACTER DESCRIPTION: Mild mannered scientist with temper and control issues.
SEEKING: Flexible. I like playing Bruce a couple of way- either physically unlikely to go after his own fulfillment because o the condition but enjoying satisfying his partners through other ways as a dominant, or seeking tranquility and self-mastery through submission and masochism. I am also open to anything else and all in between.
KINKS Talking, for sure. Almost any of these kinks, I would prefer to start from the negotiation phase, and move into the play. Huge sucker for forced orgasm, as well.
YES: Electricity, fucking machines, medical fetish
NO: Age play, noncon
MAYBE: Dubcon (needs to begin with IC negotiation.)
biochemistry: (Default)

[personal profile] biochemistry 2015-07-05 12:52 am (UTC)(link)
[Dominant Bruce tying Jemma up and making her come till she's exhausted?]

Bruce Banner: MCU: OTA

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Bastet || Egyptian Mythology

[personal profile] theeyeofra 2015-07-04 04:50 pm (UTC)(link)
[OOC: Basty here is the ages old Egyptian Goddess of Protection and Cats. She's essentially a humanized cat herself; aloof and independent but somehow spoiled and needy at the same time. She can actually shift into a cat as well. Particularly interested in EVERYDAY 1, 2, 5, 7, 8, 9 and 10 and SEXUAL 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 8, 9, 10 and 16.]
Edited 2015-07-04 16:51 (UTC)
im_gonna_heal_u: (m-my secchan porn collection)

[personal profile] im_gonna_heal_u 2015-07-07 06:11 pm (UTC)(link)
[[This is late, but curious as to how ordinary 7&8 -> sexual 2 sounded to you.]]
im_gonna_heal_u: (because sex appeal!)

Konoka Konoe | Mahou Sensei Negima | OTA

[personal profile] im_gonna_heal_u 2015-07-04 05:43 pm (UTC)(link)
BRIEF CHARACTER DESCRIPTION: A very cheery and motherly type of girl. Somewhat naive and fairly romantic, but not foolish. Generally likes taking care of people, regardless of top or bottom.
SEEKING: Give me all of your ordinary life skit. Just going ordinary or blending ordinary with sexual would be great. Going to prefer a girl if she is topping.

KINKS
YES: Anything not listed below, with special love to casual bondage, age/roleplay, massage and maybe therapy
NO: Medical fetish, bathroom stuff, extremes
MAYBE: Kink parties. Largely wanting a 1 on 1 experience
chainsnwhips: (Default)

Nana Chigusa || Nana to Kaoru

[personal profile] chainsnwhips 2015-07-04 06:02 pm (UTC)(link)
[Most certainly the sub here, this meme is practically her canon. For kinks go ahead and refer to this.]
Edited 2015-07-04 18:02 (UTC)
plays_dirty: by me (Default)

Marcus Flint | Harry Potter | Either roll

[personal profile] plays_dirty 2015-07-04 06:25 pm (UTC)(link)
Everyday
No: 8.
Maybe:9.
Open to all others

Sexual
No: 13. 14. 16.
not_a_commie: (Default)

Bucky Barnes | Marvel (MCU and or 616 ) Either Roll

[personal profile] not_a_commie 2015-07-04 06:25 pm (UTC)(link)
Everyday
No: 8.
Maybe:9.
Open to all others

Sexual
No: 13. 14. 16.
callshimsir: by me (Default)

James Wesley | DareDevil either roll

[personal profile] callshimsir 2015-07-04 06:26 pm (UTC)(link)
Everyday
No: 8.
Maybe:9.
Open to all others

Sexual
No: 13. 14. 16.
blind_devil: (Default)

Re: James Wesley | DareDevil either roll

[personal profile] blind_devil 2015-07-05 01:48 am (UTC)(link)
[A mi x of 1, 6, and ten in the sexual options?]

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nexttarget: (Default)

Clint Barton | Marvel | 616/MCU (Sub, No Natasha's)

[personal profile] nexttarget 2015-07-04 06:27 pm (UTC)(link)
Everyday
No: 8.
Maybe:9.
Open to all others

Sexual
No: 13. 14. 16.
Edited 2015-07-04 18:27 (UTC)
whichisit: (Default)

Henry Sturges | Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter / Last American Vampire Dom

[personal profile] whichisit 2015-07-04 06:28 pm (UTC)(link)
Everyday
No: 8.
Maybe:9.
Open to all others

Sexual
No: 13. 14. 16.
biochemistry: (climbed up on the rainbow)

Jemma Simmons | Agents of SHIELD

[personal profile] biochemistry 2015-07-04 08:00 pm (UTC)(link)
[ota with strong f/f preference; definite sub, kinks in journal; NO to everyday 8,9,10 and sexual 3,4,11-15. Edited to add I'm very interested in things that are not immediately sexual and psychological.]
Edited 2015-07-05 00:55 (UTC)
showing: (Default)

harry starks | the long firm | m/m

[personal profile] showing 2015-07-04 10:12 pm (UTC)(link)
Definitely the dom, though he is a bit of a masochist. Harry canonically prefers younger men (18+) but he might be convinced to try on an older bloke if he's pretty enough. While he's got experience with torture in his professional life, he's actually a fairly gentle lover, so he might need a little convincing ( or a bratty boy who's misbehaved somehow ) to hurt his partner, but boy would he be into it once he got going.

His canon is around 1950-70s London but he kind of went on the lam around the world at the end there. I'm open to AUs.

non-sexual
no: 8
maybe: 9

sexual
no: 15, 16
maybe: 5, 7
knightbynight: (65)

Bruce Wayne | Dark Knight/DCU | M/M

[personal profile] knightbynight 2015-07-04 10:13 pm (UTC)(link)
[No one under age, no one he has raised from a child (ie: robins). Cross canon, cross-medium, all welcome.

Actually only interested in the sexual stuff (no ageplay, everything else is gold).

Kinks are in his journal. I will do dom or sub, though dominant is much, much easier to achieve (unless you're Clark). Be aware that he's a major masochist either way.

Questions/brainstorming/whatever, just drop me a PM]
Edited 2015-07-04 22:18 (UTC)
baseball_baka: (Default)

Yamamoto Takeshi | Katekyo Hitman Reborn! | ota

[personal profile] baseball_baka 2015-07-04 10:18 pm (UTC)(link)
[Yamamoto can be either TYE or TYL flavor. He's more sub than dom, but can play either on request. A kink list is here]

Everyday -
Anything goes

Sexual -
NO - 7, 13, 16
hibariskylark: (What If I Want You?)

[personal profile] hibariskylark 2015-07-04 11:14 pm (UTC)(link)
[It had been an accident, almost. The two of them coming together wasn't anything new, not really. Not even the way that Takeshi had decided to distract him from one of those stupid mafia parties that he hated so much. Tsuna talking with the heads of allied families and rivals and Kyoya stuck trying to pretend like he doesn't hate being around people.

Sometimes, Yamamoto pulls him away, finds a quiet corner, and fucks him with hot words whispered into the back of his neck, and Kyoya is about as calm as he gets for the rest of the night. It wasn't that he hadn't been thinking about what he was doing, he just hadn't been thinking about the consequences.

His back pressed into a bathroom stall, naked while Yama just has his slacks down around his hips. That voice whispering against his ear, alluring and teasing because there are people just outside, and Kyoya is always loud. He'll get them caught if he isn't careful. He couldn't tell you why he'd told Yama to gag him, to bind his hands, but he's not sure he's ever come apart like he has bound in their silk ties. As much as he might be a baseball idiot, Takeshi's too smart to have missed it. So Kyoya deals with it the only way that he knows how -- he tries to avoid it.

Needless to say, this doesn't work out particularly well. Even if Takeshi hadn't been inclined to trying to talk about it before, the sudden vanishing of the Cloud would likely have proved the necessity of it regardless. He's hardly sure how it happens, really, save that the Rain is so thoroughly in his life whether he likes it or not that a week and a half later he finds himself faced with sushi and that idiot's smiling face as if this is somehow normal and nothing out of the ordinary.

It's that fact, more than anything that gets Kyoya to actually settle down. The way he doesn't look at him like he's judging him, or like he has any expectations. So he sits down and tries not to flush under that gaze.

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first times, heh

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suzumitamao: (Default)

Tamao Suzumi | Strawberry Panic | F/F

[personal profile] suzumitamao 2015-07-04 10:25 pm (UTC)(link)
BRIEF CHARACTER DESCRIPTION: A fairly sweet and bookwise girl, Tamao does tend to grow obsessive with those closest to her affections. She'd be very devoted as a sub and equal parts affectionate and controlling as a domme.

SEEKING: Anyone willing to indulge, cross-canon, canon. Prose is easier to read (and write considering formatting), but I'm not very picky.

KINKS
YES: Anything not listed below, with special love to casual bondage, age/roleplay, massage and maybe therapy
NO: Medical fetish, bathroom stuff, extremes
MAYBE: Kink parties. Largely wanting a 1 on 1 experience
hibariskylark: (Tie Me Up)

Hibari Kyoya | Katekyo Hitman Reborn! | M/M for anything sexual

[personal profile] hibariskylark 2015-07-04 10:30 pm (UTC)(link)
BRIEF CHARACTER DESCRIPTION: Kyoya is a violent yakuza prince with ties to the Italian mafia. Played as sub and gay. He can take some work to get into actual lifestyle, though totally liable to accidentally fall into BDSM themes through a fight. So I'm open to talking out assumed CR for the purposes of the meme.
SEEKING: A Dom willing to work with a sub that can have trouble articulating what they need/want, and who is prone to pushing boundaries, and really doesn't understand relationships to begin with.

KINKS
YES: His Kinklist is here But for meme prompts I'm particularly interested in negotiation, clothing kinks / crossdressing, bathing, talking, humiliation, in public, petplay, punishment, bondage, spanking, shaving, piercings, sensory deprivation, first time, kink parties, roleplay.
NO: See my kinklist, but mostly bathroom stuff.
MAYBE: Noncon.
fundonohono: (smoking)

here goes

[personal profile] fundonohono 2015-07-04 11:40 pm (UTC)(link)
There is a large box on the bed. There's a slick white note attached to it. It's no mystery how the package got to the place where Hibari was staying. While the hotel had the highest of security due to it's very powerful Japanese guest, Xanxus had easily bullied his way through them. After all, this isn't Japan, this is Italy and you don't say "no" to Xanxus Vongola. Not if you want to remain breathing a little longer.

He doesn't linger. He's already made his point, just by leaving that package and the note. He's certain his cologne will hang in the air as well, letting the yakuza boss know without a doubt he had been there. Letting him know what once again, the most powerful Mafia Don in Italy had invaded his private space. Pushed his boundaries yet again.

He'd done that since the first time they met for business. When he had traveled to Japan to deal with some offshoot branch of his Family. It had been quite an educational experience in a lot of ways. Traveling to Japan, he learned first hand how difficult the Yakuza boss was but also how...sensual he was. How hard and yet rewarding it had been to put that man on his knees and show him his place.

But he couldn't always be around. Couldn't always remind Hibari who was in charge, so he took pleasure in opportunities like this. When they were in the same countries at the same time.

Opening the box will reveal a truly stunning dress. Form fitting in all the right places, with corseting. It's a lovely silver gray in color. The same color as Hibari's eyes. There are shoes as well. Delicate silver stilettos with what looks for all the world like ankle cuffs attached. The note itself is written in a strong, familiar hand.

My Uccellino.
I will come and get you at 830pm. Be dressed by then.
Yours,
XV

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mendacium: (defended all my demons)

Nora Gainesborough | True Blood

[personal profile] mendacium 2015-07-04 10:45 pm (UTC)(link)
[ota; 99% domme and the exceptions know it; preferences in journal; no everyday 9, sexual 4,5,12-16]
volleybutt: (pic#9157566)

Daichi Sawamura | Haikyuu!! | M/M

[personal profile] volleybutt 2015-07-04 11:24 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Fine with every prompt, with particular interest in feeding, nonsexual bondage, humiliation, punishment, spanking, piercing/tattooing, orgasm denial and ageplay. Daichi works best as a submissive unless played against castmates, in which case I'll play him in either role! ]
cipher_nine: (little smirk)

Cipher Nine - SWTOR

[personal profile] cipher_nine 2015-07-05 02:09 am (UTC)(link)
BRIEF CHARACTER DESCRIPTION: Cybernetic spy and mostly freelance agent who continues working for the Empire out of loyalty. Not exactly a bad guy...you just don't want to be his target. Hardcore dom, submits only grudgingly with a lot of assumed CR required, and even then he'll probably critique your character's technique the entire time. You may call him 'agent' or 'sir'.
SEEKING: M/M, Cipher Nine is powersexual and gets off on dominating those stronger than him, either physically or with the Force.

KINKS
YES: Punishment/discipline, caning/whipping/spanking, first time, orgasm denial/forced orgasm, sensory deprivation, bondage, fucking machines.
NO: Ageplay, animal play, feeding.
MAYBE: The light stuff, as therapy, shaving, medical fetish, electricity (being a cyborg, he doesn't handle shocks very well and this is a hard IC trigger; I'd be willing to play with this kink, but expect the scene to go off the rails very quickly if it's introduced without warning.)
giftedistheterm: (blue light)

Simon Tam - Firefly

[personal profile] giftedistheterm 2015-07-05 02:17 am (UTC)(link)
BRIEF CHARACTER DESCRIPTION: The good doctor Tam has a few secrets, like his sister being a psychic and being on the lamb with her, hiding from the government who experimented on her. Don't become a threat to him or his family however, and he'll do his best to help if you need it. For this meme he is a switch, though tends to be submissive unless his buttons are pushed once too often.
SEEKING: Open to m/m and f/m.

KINKS
YES: Bathing, massage, dates, negotiation, bondage (sexual and non), the light stuff, sensory deprivation, first time, orgasm denial/forced orgasm, fucking machines.
NO: In public, genital torture, medical fetish, ageplay, piercing/tattooing.
MAYBE: Caning/whipping/spanking, kink parties.
shiniest: (Default)

[personal profile] shiniest 2015-07-05 03:04 am (UTC)(link)
[up for her? They could be switches together.]
mewling_quim: (Relieved)

Natasha Romanoff/Black Widow | MCU | ota

[personal profile] mewling_quim 2015-07-05 01:02 pm (UTC)(link)
[Kink list is here.]
halfremembered: (A somber smile.)

Aether Brandier | Original | M/F

[personal profile] halfremembered 2015-07-11 05:09 am (UTC)(link)
[ Not interested in 9 and 13-14 in sexual. Open only with prior discussion to 8-9 in everyday, as well as 9 and 16 in sexual. Completely open to everything else. Ask me if you have any questions. ]
Edited 2015-07-11 05:17 (UTC)
thestorminside: (Curiouser and curiouser.)

Elsa / Frozen / ota

[personal profile] thestorminside 2015-07-11 05:13 am (UTC)(link)
( Up for everything except 8 in everyday, 9, 13 in sexual. Elsa is more of a natural top but can try to be a bottom, and I'd prefer a discussion before kicking anything off. )
wizard_dresden: (Default)

[personal profile] wizard_dresden 2015-07-11 11:39 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Is Elsa interested in a submissive/bottom wizard? His kink list is here ]
Edited 2015-07-11 23:40 (UTC)
faceofbeau: ({♡}  Smirk)

Captain Jack Harkness | Doctor Who/Torchwood

[personal profile] faceofbeau 2015-07-14 05:12 am (UTC)(link)
BRIEF CHARACTER DESCRIPTION: Flirtatious ex-Time Agent, ex-conman, leader of Torchwood Three. A switch who can roll towards top or bottom depending on his partner and their chemistry.
SEEKING: Fun! I'd love to have Jack submit, but I'm also open to have him play dom or switch. Fair warning, I am a super slow tagger.

KINKS Kink list here
YES: Everyday: 7, 8, 10. Sexual: 2, 3, 5, 6, 9, 10, 14, 15
NO: Sexual: 11, plus any OOC limits listed on Jack's kink list
MAYBE: Everyday: 3. Sexual: 4, 7. Anything else not listed!