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[buttongue]

The Gold Saucer Meme



You're at Gold Saucer. Gold Saucer! One of the most famous amusement parks ever, filled with games and adventure and party members and secrets just waiting to be discovered! This is going to be awesome!

"But what can you do here?" you might be asking. Well, let's check out the map...



Alright.

1. You can chill at Wonder Square. That's where you'd find the bulk of the arcade games, get silly prizes...like, if there's a stuffed chocobo plushie you're trying to win, you'll probably win it there. It's also a good place to meet new people and/or get your fortune told. You know, it's one of those good meeting places.

2. Or you could go to Battle Square. For the low, low, low price of 10 GP you get to enjoy an intense and really realistic fighting game, in which you go through subsequent rounds of fighting with escalating difficulty and arbitrary status effects being dropped on your party for no particular reason. For the more active types.

3. Or you could go race chocobos. Are you a jockey or otherwise involved in racing chocobos, like a chocobo stablehand, or are you more of a spectator? Either way, it's cutthroat and there's rumors that less savory people are racing in a bid to win their freedom, but that's obvious nonsense. But it's still very competitive.

4. Or you could go to the Event Square. Generally speaking, nothing's going on, but through a wacky set of circumstances we know as meme magic you'll find that your arrival timed perfectly and you'll be asked to participate in a silly play. The default is Princess Rosa being kidnapped by the Evil Dragon King Valvados, and the hero Alfred is sent to rescue her. But...well, that's just the default option. Go with whatever sort of play makes you happy.

5. If you're tired there's also Ghost Square, aka the haunted house/obligatory hotel. Yes, it's a haunted house hotel. Ill fated phasmophobiacs beware. You will not sleep.

6. But hey. If you're unable to sleep there's always Round Square, with gondolas, scenic fireworks, a pristine view of Gold Saucer in all of its glittering glory, maybe some...kissing?

7. There's also Speed Square, which consists of a roller coaster shooter that's basically what you get if you mix a roller coaster with laser tag. Good times!

8. And finally, there's dodging security because you pissed them off just that much. Had problems with the exchange rate? Screwed up the play at Event Square that much? Took Battle Square too seriously and accidentally assaulted an employee? Whatever the case may be...run. Run!

Comments

Kunsel | Crisis Core Final Fantasy VII

[deus_ex_phs]

8 (because when aren't these two in trouble?)

[modulatingphase]

Thankfully, the play had been spared Zack's attempts at acting. Unfortunately for the arcade machines, they had not been spared Zack's attempts at winning that chocobo...or his still pretty childish (he's fifteen! sue him!) annoyance at how much gil it had taken from him without even giving him the bird.

Yeah, those machines? They're not built to take SOLDIER strength. Not even Second Class. Security had not been happy. Especially when Zack had grabbed his buddy by the wrist and bolted; they don't get paid enough to repair that even together and if Angeal finds out about this...oh, that's just not a thought he wants to have.

"Keep running!"

He has to shout it over the guards yelling for them to stop, the first two now joined by three more, and the people around them stare in alarm. SOLDIER, it seems, is something else entirely.

(And whose fault is that?)

[deus_ex_phs]

Something else indeed. Even with five guards on their tail - five guards who know this place way better than either of them - the two teenagers still manage to keep ahead.

Barely.

...mostly because it's hard for normal humans to keep up with anyone who can forgo stairs by simply jumping the railings and dropping down to the next floor.

"I am running!" Kunsel shouts back. "Wait, why am I running? You're the one who broke it, Zack!" He has to pause while their booted feet slam into the ground. "And what the hell! I thought you had that under control!"

(always his~)

[modulatingphase]

"I did! It wasn't supposed to break!"

He doesn't even sound out of breath. Not like those guards back there, who either take the stairs or break something. Honestly, he feels a little sorry for them. Just a little.

"It was just a little shake, man! Something to knock the bird loose! I didn't think the whole thing would shatter like that!"

And he didn't even get to grab the bird he spent so much gil on winning. So unfair. He pouts, turning a corner to dodge a guard incoming from the other direction. These guys have got to have radios or something because that was just so unfair!

"And you're runnin' cause you don't wanna abandon your best buddy, that's why!"

[deus_ex_phs]

Zack, don't act like radio technology is something new and inaccessible to the public. Of course the guards have radios!

"Exactly! You didn't think!" Kunsel skids around the hapless guard in the moment where the man is still half-twisted in his attempt to latch onto Zack. The startled guard stumbles, but Kunsel has to give him credit for catching his balance pretty quickly.

Of course, that means he can join in on the chase just that much more quickly, too.

"If this leads to me getting punished for that, too, I might have to rethink my stance on our friendship!" An empty threat, and they both know it, but Zack deserves to have a little frustration vented in his direction. "Come on, let's lose them in the transport hub!" He jerks a hand toward the set of slides that take tourists to other parts of the Saucer.

[modulatingphase]

They still shouldn't be that fast at using them! That's just not fair at all and--whoops! Two more, right on their tail. These guys are good, he has to give them that. Even if they can't catch up, they're keeping up.

It makes Zack grin a bit, more than Kunsel's empty threat could ever make him pout, as he alters his course towards the hub instead. Now, they could head for the exit and just get out of here...or they could try to lose the guards in the crowd instead. And isn't that an idea? Oh, yeah. He's going for it.

"Head for the Square! We'll lose 'em in there!"

[deus_ex_phs]

Kunsel could point out that Zack could be that fast, too, if he, you know, practiced using his PHS. Kunsel would even be willing to volunteer to help him practice, too! (Seriously, talk to him, buddy. He wants to hear everything.)

But they're a little busy right now, so that suggestion will have to wait.

It's almost on the tip of his tongue to ask which Square (there's six others besides the one they're in, you doof!) but you know what? Never mind. He's just going to follow Zack's lead and hop into whichever slide he picks.

It occurs to him as they're sliding to the Event Square that he's getting way too used to following Zack's lead when he stirs up insanity.

But the Event Square... "Good thinking!" There's plenty of people here to hide their presence. In fact, people seem to be gathering for some kind of performance. Even better for them! "Stop running and let's see if we can blend in!"

[modulatingphase]

The suggestion's probably going to have to wait until they're off KP duty, which is what's doubtlessly going to happen once Angeal catches wind of this; Kunsel may not be his student in the way that Zack is, but Commander Hewley is terrifying in ways that those guards still dogging them will never be.

Not nearly as disconcerting as Zack's ideas, though. Commander Hewley wouldn't ever have them considering jumping off a small cliff and into the sea the way Zack had that one time they were out by Junon. Most of his 'good thinking' is just as reckless as his bad...but the crowd parts for the runners anyway, and he hunches down so his spikes don't show. Once Kunsel is in earshot of a whisper, however, he points to the stage.

"Head for the back. We could slip out through there or wait these guys out."

Just so long as they're not in the crowd when it thins. They're already getting a few looks! ...Or no, because that's just him. Kunsel's much too well behaved to get looks like Zack does.

[deus_ex_phs]

Kunsel's getting a few looks, too, Zack. What do you expect when two SOLDIER Seconds are running through a crowd? Kunsel offers a weak wave a reassuring smile to the people looking at them, then reaches out to try to snag Zack's arm. It seems like that's the only way he's going to get his friend to slow down.

"Got it," he whispers back. "Just try to act natural. We don't want anyone to think they have any reason to stop us."

Fortunately, the stage hands all appear to be busy- oh. Looks like they're about to start a play. Perfect. That should provide plenty of chaos behind the curtains for them to slip through. As impromptu plans go, it's a pretty good plan.

Too bad it never has a chance.

"You two!"

Uh oh. Spotted by the man dressed like a king!

[modulatingphase]

Ah, shoot. So much for getting through unnoticed! Act natural, huh? Zack flinches a bit, like a kid with his hand caught in the sweets jar, but slowly begins to stand. Even at fifteen, he still stands a good head taller than a lot of people around here. If the guards run past, they're going to get spotted.

Act natural. Right.

"Us?" When the man nods, Zack all but railroads over him before he can speak again. "Sorry, man, but we're kind of in a hurry. Maybe next time."

For whatever it is he's just going to keep walking, not bothering to pull free of Kunsel. Stick close, man. They just gotta keep moving...

[deus_ex_phs]

"You better believe you're in a hurry," the fake king growls, glaring ominously and planting himself right in their path. "You two were supposed to be here five minutes ago! The whole play's waiting for you!"

"But-" With a rising sense of alarm, Kunsel tries to cut in, only to get interrupted by a large, ornate prop sword getting shoved into his face. There's one getting shoved into Zack's hands, too.

"No buts!" the king barks. "Now move it, move it, move it!" He circles around faster than a man that big has any right to move and starts herding them straight toward the stage.

[modulatingphase]

The thought that they're SOLDIER crosses through Zack's mind as he's also handed a sword, the feel of it all off. They could easily force their way around him, slip past the curtain and head straight on out of here, regardless of the prop swords and how off balance they feel.

But the entire idea of coming into this part of the Saucer was to avoid attention, not draw more of it. Making a run for it is going to draw attention to them, and so Zack sends a helpless look in Kunsel's direction even as he's forced to keep moving. Nothing to do about it, buddy. Just gotta do it. But even so...

"What's the play? We don't know the lines!"

...No really they don't this could be just a case of mistaken identity.

[deus_ex_phs]

Inexplicably, several other actors nearby burst into laughter at Zack's protest. "Good one!" someone calls out.

Even the king flashes Zack a grin before clapping him hard on the shoulder. "There we go. That's the right attitude! Just don't forget that and you'll do fine."

What? Kunsel catches the helpless look Zack sends his way, and shoots him one of his own. "But we don't know the lines," he tries to back Zack up, in case they're just not taking Zack seriously.

"That's all right," the king says cheerfully. "None of us do!" And just to emphasize his point, he gives them one last shove - right onto the stage. Right in front of the crowd.

A crowd with a pair of guards prowling along the edges. Kunsel gulps any other protests down. But now what do they do? They can't just stand there frozen, right? Crap, crap, crap. Kunsel silently swears as the crowd quiets down, and all eyes but the guards' fix on them.

[lookingformateria]

[Wooo! Time to have fun! I rolled 5 but I don't know how to start that. Thoughts?]

[deus_ex_phs]

[Hmm. Well, Yuffie's a pretty vocal character. I bet she'd have more than a few things to say to someone (hapless hotel staff? Kunsel? the supposed ghosts themselves?) if she got woken up in the middle of the night by spectral wails.

That help spark any thoughts?

As for Kunsel, it's pretty easy to have him passing through or set him up as one of the guests (or on the other end of a PHS, if that works!), so it shouldn't be hard for me to work with whatever scenario sounds good to you.]

Got it! Thank ya ~

[lookingformateria]

[It has been a really bad day and now it is an awful night.

Yuffie pulls the covers over her face and groans as the realization that she isn't going to sleep slowly sinks in. Her almond gaze is dimmed from annoyance and lack of sleep as she kicks the covers to the floor. This is stupid. Not just stupid. This is absolutely ridiculous!

What's the point of a hotel, haunted or otherwise, if you can't sleep?!

She isn't scared of ghosts but they could at least be quite about the whole I'm dead thing. No one cares! Yuffie throws her pillow at the wall as if attacking an invisible specter before jumping from bed. She is still wearing her pajama's when she stalks through the halls looking for someone to receive the brunt of her annoyance.

That's when her gaze fell on Kunsel.]

What are you doing here? [She doesn't mean for her tone to sound so sharp but she's sleepy and there were two things that put Yuffie in a bad mood. One is being hungry and the other sleepy.]

No problem~

[deus_ex_phs]

Yuffie?

[Surprise filters into Kunsel's voice when he hears that familiar voice. He hadn't been aware that she was here. Unfolding his arms, he turns to face her in all her pajama-clad glory.]

I was going to sleep here. [You know, like most people do in hotels.] I just got here a little later than I planned. What are you doing up?

[lookingformateria]

[Yuffie flushes slightly. Of course, he's here to sleep and of course, he'd catch her running after a ghost.]

Those stupid things keep waking me up. [She hears a faint chuckle from some ghost as she spoke.] Hey!

[She turns wondering if she'd see the strange specter who chose to wake her. Her hands ball into fists as she glares down the hall.]

Stupid jerk. Why can't he just let me sleep!!! [Yuffie looks back at Kunsel.] See, I have a problem. [Which translates to: help me with my problem.]

[deus_ex_phs]

[There's just one problem with your problem, Yuffie: You can't exactly fight ghosts. What did she expect Kunsel to be able to do?]

Can't you just ignore them? They can't do anything to you. [Well, other than wail and make noise. He shrugs, offering her a hint of a smile.] Can't be any worse than sleeping in a barracks full of guys all snoring, and I've managed that a few times. [More than a few.] Haven't you ever had to sleep in a noisy situation?

[lookingformateria]

[You can't fight ghost but that doesn't mean that Yuffie isn't going to try. She pouts looking up at Kunsel with an annoyed gaze.]

I'm sorry I don't have experience sleeping in a room filled with a bunch of men. [She sticks out her tongue and the haunting laughing continues. Apparently the ghost found Yuffie's joke funny.]

Ah! I can't take it!

[deus_ex_phs]

[Don't look at him like that! Seriously, what's a guy supposed to do?

Other than hastily amend what he said, because whoa that was not what he meant.]

I wasn't saying that you did! Just... something like that. Noisy parties? PHS alerts that just won't stop? It can't always be quiet for you at night.

[lookingformateria]

[Yuffie watches him with a pout still on her lips. She isn’t happy with this situation and it was obvious that any good ideas weren’t going to come from her. She is annoyed which meant that she had to kick something to feel better, except you can’t kick ghosts.]

If there is noise I usually wake up. [She crosses her arms with a huff. She isn’t a light sleeper but falling asleep with noise was hard for her unless she was very very tired.]

Help me think of something.

[She glances around the hall as if to make sure both specter and guest couldn’t hear her.]

Please?

[deus_ex_phs]

"I guess finding somewhere else to sleep is out of the question?" It is a little bit too late at night to be heading back to Corel, and getting back into the Gold Saucer always costs more money, unless someone's ponied up the money it takes to buy a lifetime pass.

Not that that means that he'll give up and abandon her to her misery. Not when she's giving him a look like that. Not when she's saying 'please.'

"What about drowning the noise out with something you don't mind? Music, television - something like that."

[lookingformateria]

She just stared at him a moment longer as if he had grown a tail or second head. When he finally suggested something useful she considered him seriously.

“Do you know where I can get music of television here? The tv in my room doesn’t work.” Which she assumed was because the ghost that kept bugging her hadn’t wanted her to ignore him.

Yuffie watched Kunsel expectantly. He probably didn’t have all the answers but she was looking at him like he just might. He’s a helpful person so she didn’t see why he wouldn’t help again.

[deus_ex_phs]

At the question, Kunsel shrugs and wryly holds up his key. "Honestly? I just got here. I haven't even checked into my own room yet." And radio and television aren't really things he uses much, relying more on his PHS for news, so he hadn't bothered asking about them before booking his room.

But actually, now that it's been brought up, that does introduce a possibility. "We could check, and if mine work, we could switch rooms. I don't have a particular attachment to which bed I use."