bakerstreet | the INSOMNIA meme

the INSOMNIA meme

the i n s o m n i a meme

It happens to everyone - sometimes, you have nights where you just can't fall asleep, no matter what you do. It could be for a number of reasons, or no reason at all. And this is what's happened now: you've been laying in bed for what feels like hours, just tossing and turning, and nothing seems to help. So what's left to do? Get out of bed and go wake someone else up, of course. If you're not getting any sleep, then why should they?

i n s t r u c t i o n s

• Post with your character (note the name and fandom in the subject).
• Other people reply to you by generating a number from 1 to 10.
• Have fun!

o p t i o n s

01 • FEAR. Maybe you're hearing strange, indeterminable noises; maybe there's a severe storm happening outside; maybe you watched a scary movie before bed? Whatever the reason, you're terrified and it's keeping you awake. You just want to wake someone else up so they can protect you from the monster in your closet.
02 • HUNGER. Your stomach is growling and it just won't stop. Or perhaps your throat is so dry you could cough up a tumbleweed? Well, you've gone to the kitchen to remedy this and hey, that was a pan that just dropped on the floor. It was loud enough to wake the dead! Oops.
03 • PAIN. Your body is completely worn out, be it from exercise, battle, sickness, or what have you. Either way you're in enough pain to keep you from sleeping, so maybe someone else has a home remedy or something, or can at least help you take your mind off of it.
04 • SOLITUDE. For some reason, your bed just feels so empty at the moment. You're feeling terribly lonely and really just want someone to keep you company for a while. Maybe it'd be easier to fall asleep if you're with them...
05 • DISCOMFORT. Your room is an oven. Either that or a freezer. Or maybe this bed is just really uncomfortable? Who knows why you can't get to sleep, it feels like it could be anything. Why even bother trying? Maybe someone else can preoccupy you until you feel tired enough to ignore your discomfort.
06 • PENSIVE. Something's on your mind, and no matter how hard you try to focus elsewhere, it's just not going to work. Your body may be tired, but your mind is incredibly busy and it's virtually impossible to get to sleep. Surely, talking it out with someone else will help?
07 • SADNESS. Something terrible has happened that day, perhaps; or you could just be severely depressed. Either way you're trying your hardest not to cry yourself to sleep, and it's not working at all. Better find a way to get it out of your system somehow; you need a shoulder to cry on.
08 • ANGER. You are just... fuming. Who knows why - that annoying dog is barking again, or maybe the people next door are getting busy and keeping you awake. Whatever the reason for your ire is, you'd better put an end to it so you can get some damn rest already! Go wake up a friend so you can complain to them.
09 • RESTLESS. You're far too energetic to sleep right now. Maybe you're just trying to do so out of necessity - you have to be up early tomorrow! But you just don't think you'll be able to fall asleep for a while now, so why waste the time trying to sleep when you could be doing something else? Namely bothering someone else - you're totally jealous because they're getting more sleep than you.
10 • WILDCARD. Choose one of the options above, or make up your own scenario.

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[Some nights, Kieran can't seem to fall asleep for anything in the world. He lies awake, staring at the shadowed places the rafters would be if a candle was lit until it feels like he's in more danger of dying of boredom than sleeping.

On those nights--and there have been more and more of them lately--he gets out of bed as quietly as he can and pulls on his clothes.

He likes the garden best after the sun sets, anyway. It's quiet and dark when others have left, and though it's cold, he rarely notices the chill through his warm clothes and leather gloves. The stars seem to shine brighter when you can see your breath in the air, anyway.

Usually when he shuts the heavy wooden door behind him, there's no one waiting to greet him, but that's not the case tonight. There's a figure waiting in the moonlight, one he could recognize from silhouette alone if he had to.]

Mother?

[Surprised, she wrenches herself out of her own tangled thoughts and quickly turns toward the sound of Kieran's voice.]

What wakes you, my love?

['Tis late. Or perhaps 'very early' would be a more appropriate phrase at this point. She is a fool for not being in bed right now when she has a sleeping draught already made and can use it at any time, but there are nights when she is too stubborn for her own good.]

Do you need something?

[For a moment, he thinks she must have known he's been sneaking out to the garden on sleepless nights. Surely she's here to quirk an eyebrow at him and ask what it is he seeks when the hour is so late.

But she's as surprised at his presence as he is at hers. Kieran walks over to her, searching silently for an answer he likes the sound of.]

I couldn't sleep. [Which seems childish, once he's said it, but it's the truth.] What are you doing?

Much the same as you, I imagine.

[Half a smile curves her lips.]

You are not the only one sleep sometimes evades, little man. 'Tis cold, of course, but at this time of night the garden is almost entirely quiet. [It almost feels as though it is hers alone and not just a courtyard in a fortress they are guests in while tethered to the Inquisition.] And tonight we are treated to the clearest of skies. If one must have trouble sleeping, this is a good night for it.

[He smiles back, tentative, and since she doesn't seem cross to be interrupted...] I always come here when I can't sleep.

[Of course, Mother is rarely cross--with him, at least. Her tolerance for other people comes and goes. (But Kieran's quite sure that it wouldn't be fair of her to be annoyed to find him wandering Skyhold in the wee hours of the morning, anyway, since she's doing the same.)

He glances up at the sky when she mentions it, looking for familiar constellations.] There's Kios. [And then he looks back at her.] Why can't you sleep?

Like mother, like son, I suppose.

[The smile he responds with makes hers even warmer.]

I simply cannot seem to quiet my thoughts tonight. It seemed pointless to stay in bed when I was lying there so very awake, so here I am, seeking to clear my mind.

[The night's most persistent thoughts are nothing that should keep him awake as well. She would sooner attempt to help him sleep, or at least pass some time with him until he feels sleep is more likely. She gestures to the ground by the well in the center of the garden.]

Would you like to sit with me?

[Ever curious about the goings-on of the Inquisition and its plans, Kieran wouldn't mind hearing what keeps Mother awake--but he takes her answer at face value. Sometimes there isn't a good reason to be awake; he can't place what's keeping him from sleep tonight, beyond the usual vague worries he has. What if the dreams come, what if Corypheus wins, what if.]

Yes.

[Once they're seated on the earth, he looks up again at the sky. It is a good night to be outside, and that sets him thinking.] Do you miss the wilds?

[Legs folded in front of her, she looks skyward once more, finding Kios in the sky again. She likes to think that Kieran will always be straightforward with her when it is bad dreams that keep him awake at night, but she bides her time before broaching the subject.]

I am glad I left, but it was home.

[Now home is more of a concept than a physical place. The situation has its merits, but it is not always ideal.]

Life often seemed simpler. It was much easier to find solitude. I knew the land with my eyes closed, every herb and flower, every forgotten Chasind trail sign. One day I may take you there, if you like.

[Since coming to Skyhold, Kieran has found himself increasingly curious about Ferelden and the wilds. He's curious about the entirety of Thedas, of course, and the world that might exist beyond the sea, but he especially wants to know something more of Mother--and, admittedly, of Flemeth.]

I'd like to see it. [He draws his knees up to his chest, curling his arms around them.] If you would.

[If it wouldn't please her, he'd much prefer to leave it alone until he's old enough to travel by himself, but her offer suggests something else entirely. Regardless, he wants to go, if not necessarily to stay.]

It will not be soon.

[While she would like for him to see the Korcari Wilds, it is difficult for her to think of them as anything but Flemeth's domain. She has no idea whether or not Flemeth still maintains a presence there at all, and she refuses to find out the hard way. Especially with Kieran in tow.]

But one day. [It is very nearly a promise.] In the meantime, Skyhold is a nice change of pace.

[Her eyes return to him, fond.]

Was it difficult to reach sleep tonight, or did unpleasant dreams trouble you?

I do like Skyhold. [It's a little less trim and neat than Orlais was--and while he didn't dislike Orlais while he was there, Kieran is starting to find that he prefers Skyhold's less orderly bustle. And he's grown fond of the chilly mountain air.

He glances over at Mother when she asks her question, a little scratch of a frown furrowing his brow.]

I just couldn't sleep. [He pauses.] The dreams aren't as bad anymore.

[They're only echoes of things he dreamt before, and they lack some of the visceral vividness they once had. Still unpleasant, still something he dreads, but he doesn't like to think of Mother worrying about them.]

[Not as bad is not the same thing as gone, unfortunately. The instinct that makes her want to cure any ill he presents is one she can only think of as terribly motherly.]

I am glad to hear that much, although I am sorry you could not sleep.

[There are always potions they can mix, teas they can drink before it is time for bed. There is no problem if this happens every now and then, but sleeplessness is a habit she would spare him.]

And how do you usually spend your sleepless hours here in the garden?

Sometimes I bring a book. [That's best for cloudy nights and a candle. He's found a few in Skyhold's library that are genuinely fun, rather than dry but good for him, and Messere Tethras gave him a copy of Hard in Hightown.] Or I look at the stars. Or think.

[On as clear a night as tonight, he was planning on the latter options. But talking with Mother is a pleasant way to spend the time, too.]

What were you going to do?

[A hint of a smile lingers at the corners of her mouth.]

Look at the stars and think. Perhaps not the ideal solution, but one that agreed with me. [Her hands idly clasp together in her lap.] There were nights when you were an infant when you would barely so much as blink your eyes if I did not hum to you.

[She had precious little basis for comparison at the time. Now she thinks he was no more or less fussy than any other baby, but at the time there were moments when she was quite beside herself, trying so many ridiculous methods of comfort that she had never so much as imagined herself attempting before.]

Really?

[Kieran has never considered with interest what his life with Mother was like in the earliest days, well before his memory kept hold of the details of things. But this bit of information is intriguing and--for him--not terribly difficult to imagine. His memories of her feature a great deal of affection.]

What else did I do?

Truly. [Her smile slowly but steadily widens.] You always giggled when your nose was kissed. You liked the smell of elfroot, nuzzling my hands whenever I used it in something. [She gestures to her shoulder.] You would sometimes stroke these very feathers as though they were a pet.

[She has never doubted that he would care for one greatly, despite her reluctance to introduce that complication to their lives.]

You learned to crawl quickly, but you were not content to stop there, so eager to walk. And once you began to walk you went everywhere on the tips of your toes.

I remember that! [He's always wanted to be taller, and of course, walking on one's toes makes one feel like a cat or a fox. Or maybe a bird hopping about on talons.

As he's listened, his smile has grown with his mother's, comparing his past self with his present. He still likes the scent of elfroot, for instance, though he can't remember putting his face to Mother's hands. What a funny little baby he must have been--though, of course, he has little enough experience with infants that he doesn't know whether other infants behave similarly.]

That was before we went to Orlais, wasn't it? I used to practice animal noises--for when I could shapeshift.

[Still smiling, she arches an eyebrow.] Used to?

['Tis true that it has been some time since she heard him do so, but she will be surprised if he has outgrown it entirely.]

Yes, long before we ever set foot in court. My personal favorite was your fierce bearlike roar.

[Kieran shifts a little, ducking his head. There are many reasons he's fond of hiding out in the battlements when he has the opportunity, but the fact that no one can hear him practice his wolf howl is high on the list.]

When I can really shapeshift, I won't need to.

[And surely that will be soon. (He'll probably keep practicing anyway.)]

And I made you roar, too. For practice.

[Her smile turns into a full-fledged grin, terribly fond.] One day practice will pale in comparison.

[That is a promise.]

You insisted we roar and howl. [She would not have done it for anyone else's child.] We hissed like cats. We tried to sound like giant spiders, but I am not convinced we were ever accurate.

[She lifts her hands in front of her, palms down, and makes a skittering noise, wiggling her fingers like spindly legs.]

Soon? [He wants the answer to be soon.]

I thought you might forget how. Or that you might not sound right when you changed. [Understanding just how his mother's thoughts worked inside the skin of a bear or a spider was difficult for him when he was small. One of his more prosaic nightmares featured her attempting to defend them in another creature's form and being unable to shift.] Spiders were the hardest noise.

[His hands imitate hers, his slender-legged spider attacking hers, as giant spiders are wont to do.]

[A small laugh comes out of her, and she lets out another skittering noise, her hands gently crashing into his again.]

A shapeshifter does not forget. 'Tis as natural as breathing.

[Even if she could forget, she suspects she is far too practiced. Lowering her hands, she reaches out with one, touching his shoulder.]

It will be soon, my love. I cannot say how soon. I know patience is difficult.

I know that now. [He's smiling, putting a touch of exasperation into his voice but not really meaning it.] That was before I knew how it worked.

[When her hands hit his, he closes them around hers, transforming his spider's legs into jaws of sorts--and then lets go.]

I've been trying to be patient. [Kieran sighs, leaning against her just a little.] It's hard.

[She rests her arm over his shoulders, quiet comfort, far from unsympathetic.] I know.

Do you remember the inn with the yellow door in Val Foret? On our way to Val Royeaux for the first time? [So close to the capital and with the intention of making an impression spurring her on, it seemed wise to allow them all the luxury a nice room at an equally nice inn provided. Not a camp in the woods, not a room above a booze-soaked tavern.] There was a pond behind it? Even the fish in pond were extravagant, gold and scarlet with swirling tails.

[The memory is a suitable enough distraction for the moment. Kieran leans against her side, his head resting lightly on her shoulder.]

And the bed was so soft I couldn't sleep. [It was the finest place he'd ever seen--and then they entered Val Royeaux. Before than, Kieran hadn't realized just how extravagant the world, especially the world of the Orlesian upper class, could be.] I liked the fish; they let me touch their heads.

09.

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