7 Minutes in Heaven

[memeswearhouse]

The Rules:

1. Comment with your character name/fandom/prefs in the subject line
2. Comment around, you're now trapped in a closet and must kiss whoever you're trapped with! It can be just a simple kiss on the cheek or something a little...more. It just has to last for at least 7 comments each!
3. You don't have to start right away. Build things up! It's more fun that way.
4. ???????
5. Profit~

Stolen lovingly from memebells

Comments

Vriska Serket, Homestuck

[8r8kspider]

[candyhorns]

Oh my god, no, no way, this is not acceptable.

[8r8kspider]

Hahahahahahahaha! You're joooooooking, right? Everyone and their lusus knows you have such a deeeeeeeesperate hatecrush on me, don't even try to hide it. This must be the luckiest break in your sad, pathetic, miserable little life!

[ preeeeeeeen~ ]

[candyhorns]

Yeah, whatever, go on thinking you're somehow attractive if it makes your stupid desperate life any better, just let me out of this fucking closet, I don't want to be part of your sick games.

[8r8kspider]

Man, your thinkpan must be even more shot than I'd thought if you reeeeeeeeally think I'd let you go that easily! Come on, leader, I thought you're supposed to be the charismatic one. Persuaaaaaaaade me, if you can!

[candyhorns]

Don't you dare poke in my thinkpan, OK, and fine, let me out of the closet, or I'll tell Terezi you were fucking with me.

[8r8kspider]

I wouldn't dreeeeeeeeam of it! Everyone knows it's just empty space up in there. Booooooooring!

Also, I can deal with Terezi eeeeeeeeasily. You'll have to do much better than that!

[candyhorns]

Fuck you, no it isn't, it's full of more interesting shit than you could ever dream of looking at, and no, that's not an invitation, you just have to suffer forever knowing you can't have all the amazing secrets I'm keeping in here.

[He thinks for a minute, during which he tests the door again unconsciously. Still locked!] Let me out or I'll explain to you in minute detail why your quadrants are fucked.

[8r8kspider]

It's almost cute how you think you can stop me from prying eeeeeeeevery last disgusting secret or thought or whatever other shit out of that head of yours. But fine! I said I'll leave it alone, so shut up about it already.

[ the next statement makes her bristle, though ]

What a laugh! Like you can even try to understand how many irons I have in the quadrants fire. All of the irons, all of them!

[candyhorns]

Nope, your quadrants fire isn't big enough to have any irons in it after you've been stomping on it for sweeps.

[8r8kspider]

You think so? And what do you call the mess you've made with Terezi and that pathetic human girl???????? You don't have a chance in hell with anyone, they already have the new hot shit to drool over! No one caaaaaaaares about your whining screaming ass so you might as well give up on your dreams of having a stupid rom-com happy ending, 'cause it's not going to happen!

[candyhorns]

What the fuck are you talking about?

[8r8kspider]

Exactly what I meant, dumbass. Wow, if you're this slow on the uptake, how the hell did you eeeeeeeever become our leader? Jegus.

[candyhorns]

I didn't even do anything with Jade.

[8r8kspider]

Reeeeeeeeally! Not even a little ashen paradox three-way jam? Don't play dumb, you're already enough of it as it is!

[candyhorns]

That's not--No, you know what, we're not talking about this, we're talking about how you don't even know how pity works and you're totally burnt out on hate.

[8r8kspider]

Nope, not going to happen! All this talking is booooooooring me. What's it going to take for you to stop screaming dumb shit all the time, if you don't want me to manipulate your protein chute to shut up for you?

[candyhorns]

You can't do that.

[8r8kspider]

I suuuuuuuure can! Just try me.

[candyhorns]

Why are you so fucking dead-set against sorting out your problems, anyway?

[8r8kspider]

Oooooooobviously, because they don't need any sorting! Don't be such a meddling idiot, that's Fussyfang's job already!

[candyhorns]

Fine, be stupid and immature and keep on not understanding anything about quadrants, see if I care. Spoilers: I won't.

[8r8kspider]

Oh, I understand them peeeeeeeerfectly. And you know what?

[ suddenly up in your grill, smiling a murderer's grin in the dark ]

I don't even hate you.

[candyhorns]

[ He steps back so quickly he runs into the wall inches behind him, but when he speaks he only sounds a tiny bit more tense than usual. ]

So what, I don't give a fuck.

[8r8kspider]

I don't hate you and I don't pity you. Like every other moron still alive in our session, or even the humans'. But I do like to see you squiiiiiiiirm, and I just thought of a way to make you shut up and stop blabbing my ears off for the rest of this game, and that's to just play it. Might as weeeeeeeell, right?