Which is ridiculous, really, when he thinks about it, because he feels the most alive when everything is completely uncertain, risk in every direction. Middle of a fight that he has no certainty that he'll come out living; watching Makker's Wheel spin and having no clue if he's about to hit that big win or not. The thrill is the same, and he lives for it, craves it. But somehow, it's just different with the changes they've had within the Crows lately.

"The losses are so much bigger, Wy... Matthias is dead... Nina and Inej are leaving... that's half of us, all at once, and I don't know when I'll ever see the girls again. Nina might just go home to Ravka and decide to stay forever. Inej will be traipsing all about wherever her leads on the slavers take her..." Hadn't he been trying not to talk about it all a second ago? He's bad at that.

"You can just say so if you want to cuddle, merchling." But there's no real mockery in his voice, just the tilted smile on his lips as he considers the idea. His voice is softer with his next words, genuine in a way that Jesper struggles to be, beyond the facetious, ever-joking presentation he gives the world. "I'd try it... if you're offering."