The ache in Shiro's chest isn't just the cold anymore. He nods, a tiny, jerky thing, and bows his head to press his lips against the edge of the blanket and the warm hand underneath. It's not exactly a kiss - he's mostly resting there to try and get his emotions back under control - but it's not entirely not a kiss either.
In a way, it hurts worse, to know that here is yet another person who thinks, beyond all reason, that he is a 'good man'. When all the evidence Shiro can see right now points the exact opposite direction. He's slipping, especially recently. Badly enough that he's actually snapped at the other paladins, gone behind their backs, stormed off the bridge, executed plans without their knowledge. What kind of leader is that? It's hard to feel like he isn't completely losing his grip and sliding into the monster that lurks under the scars and nightmares.
But on the other hand, Lotor's right. He loves and supports his team the best that he can, even if that best isn't good enough. That's why it hurts so much when they don't trust him. That's why he starts doubting himself when they all fight him on something he believes is right. That's why he goes around them rather than picking fights and hurting them anymore. He wants them to be whole and safe and happy. And that's not something Haggar could ever understand. It's not something she could have put into place. It's something that he had to have had beforehand. Which means that there is someone underneath there, even if he doesn't know who it is or how to reach him right now.
He raises a hand under the blanket to curve his fingers gently over Lotor's forearm. "...Thank you. I don't feel like I'm as good a person as everyone seems to think I am, but you're right about H-- about the witch. She may have shaped me, but I'm not her creature, and that has to count for something."
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In a way, it hurts worse, to know that here is yet another person who thinks, beyond all reason, that he is a 'good man'. When all the evidence Shiro can see right now points the exact opposite direction. He's slipping, especially recently. Badly enough that he's actually snapped at the other paladins, gone behind their backs, stormed off the bridge, executed plans without their knowledge. What kind of leader is that? It's hard to feel like he isn't completely losing his grip and sliding into the monster that lurks under the scars and nightmares.
But on the other hand, Lotor's right. He loves and supports his team the best that he can, even if that best isn't good enough. That's why it hurts so much when they don't trust him. That's why he starts doubting himself when they all fight him on something he believes is right. That's why he goes around them rather than picking fights and hurting them anymore. He wants them to be whole and safe and happy. And that's not something Haggar could ever understand. It's not something she could have put into place. It's something that he had to have had beforehand. Which means that there is someone underneath there, even if he doesn't know who it is or how to reach him right now.
He raises a hand under the blanket to curve his fingers gently over Lotor's forearm. "...Thank you. I don't feel like I'm as good a person as everyone seems to think I am, but you're right about H-- about the witch. She may have shaped me, but I'm not her creature, and that has to count for something."