[He was being so very sincere, and her tease takes him by surprise as a consequence. He snorts with amusement and rolls his eyes good-naturedly.] I think of myself--thought of myself--as a soldier. For life, no less. There is no such thing as retirement as a Hellrider.
[They were, in fact, expected to accept a final mission as they aged out of usefulness. Go out in a blaze of glory. He wasn't worried. He had a few decades in him before it became an issue. Still, knowing you'll die violently makes you a poor choice for family life.
Which is why he's looking at her the way he is. For the first time it's occurred to him that in rebuilding his identity, he has the opportunity to include things that were denied to him before. No, he doesn't want to retire now, not while there's still work, but the option exists.
A paradigm shift.] Hells. I wasn't even looking for hope for the future. Not this kind, anyway.
[He's aware he's staring at her a little now, with something like wonderment. After a moment he gives himself a little shake and clears his throat, sheepish.]
Well. There's no question we're sexually compatible. It's a wonder we didn't burn the whole Grove down together. On top of that, you did save my life, in case you'd forgotten.
[That's more than enough for something serious. The only question is what happens when they're no longer fighting for their lives and the lives of those around them.] I don't know what I'm like when I'm not the Hellrider Commander. When the battle is over. But...if you're willing to take a chance and stay with me while I work that out...
no subject
[They were, in fact, expected to accept a final mission as they aged out of usefulness. Go out in a blaze of glory. He wasn't worried. He had a few decades in him before it became an issue. Still, knowing you'll die violently makes you a poor choice for family life.
Which is why he's looking at her the way he is. For the first time it's occurred to him that in rebuilding his identity, he has the opportunity to include things that were denied to him before. No, he doesn't want to retire now, not while there's still work, but the option exists.
A paradigm shift.] Hells. I wasn't even looking for hope for the future. Not this kind, anyway.
[He's aware he's staring at her a little now, with something like wonderment. After a moment he gives himself a little shake and clears his throat, sheepish.]
Well. There's no question we're sexually compatible. It's a wonder we didn't burn the whole Grove down together. On top of that, you did save my life, in case you'd forgotten.
[That's more than enough for something serious. The only question is what happens when they're no longer fighting for their lives and the lives of those around them.] I don't know what I'm like when I'm not the Hellrider Commander. When the battle is over. But...if you're willing to take a chance and stay with me while I work that out...