(403): I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.

[memesfromlastnight]

LEGGO

Comments

Kunsel | Crisis Core Final Fantasy VII

[deus_ex_phs]

1. I'm pretty sure that's not in the manual under "approved uses" for this.

2. If he starts sending me pictures, I swear I'm forwarding them to you.

3. I'm getting you a better one. Trust me, it's for your own good!

4. [text him]

1

[soldiernoclass]

Probably only because no one's ever tried it! Come on, man, live a little.

[deus_ex_phs]

Are you sure live is the word you mean? You're insane. And you like giving me grey hairs, I swear.

[soldiernoclass]

Don't be so uptight! You'd never have any fun without me.

And who knows, grey hair might be a good look for you.

[deus_ex_phs]

I have plenty of fun! You're just an adrenaline junkie, admit it.

You say that now, but wait until I learn how to pull off one of the General's glares. Bet you'll regret giving me silver hair then.

[soldiernoclass]

Yeah, right! You'd never keep a straight face, you just like me way too much.

[ Whether or not he is an unrepentant adrenaline junkie, which he really can't deny. ]

[deus_ex_phs]

[Yeah, if he'd tried to deny that one, Kunsel would have had to call BS.]

I like you alive and breathing, too. I think I could manage a straight face with incentive for me like that!

[soldiernoclass]

[ He knows his limitations.

Occasionally. ]

Aw, come on! I'm not THAT irresponsible. I mean, I'd never do something I could actually die from.

Akasdjals ZACK

[deus_ex_phs]

["Occasionally." Right.

Zack, no giving Kunsel a heart attack.]

Could have fooled me! Tell me again what made it seem like a good idea to hang around cactuars long enough to learn their 1000 Needles dance?

I'm willing to bet you're still pulling needles out from that.

i couldn't help myself

[soldiernoclass]

That was so worth it, though! And it wasn't even that bad.

If the only part you remember is the needles, you're totally missing the point.

[deus_ex_phs]

No, if the only part I remember is the needles, that means the rest traumatized me that much. I'll never be the same again and it's all your fault.

[Zack, don't listen to him.]

[soldiernoclass]

You say that like it's a bad thing. Do you really wanna go back to being the uncool Kunsel who never met somebody as awesome as me?

[ He doesn't know the meaning of "listen." ]

[deus_ex_phs]

Are you saying you thought I wasn't cool when you met me? Wow, Zack. Way to hit a guy where it hurts.

[soldiernoclass]

You were a little cool! But that's nothing compared to how cool you are, now.

[ By association. Which is the best kind of cool, obviously. ]

[deus_ex_phs]

Okay, I guess that makes me feel a little better.

So that means I'm cool enough to keep sending you tips? Because if I'm not, I can always stop.

[If Zack ever wondered if Kunsel was a troll...]

[soldiernoclass]

Yeah, but just barely.

[ Calling his bluff!! He cares too much to just let Zack hang out to dry without the constant flow of Kunsel wisdom. ]

[deus_ex_phs]

[Dammit, Zack knows him too well.]

Gee, thanks.

Speaking of which, heads up. There've been some reports of monsters migrating down from the mountains in your area. Might run into something you're not expecting, so keep your eyes peeled. I don't want to have to be deployed just to save your butt.

[soldiernoclass]

Thanks, mom. Am I gonna need a jacket while I'm out hunting monsters, too?

[ He only teases because he cares Kunsel honest. ]

[deus_ex_phs]

No, but don't forget your spare underwear. Fighting's a dirty business, but that doesn't mean you have to come home dirty, too.

[He knows, and he's more than willing to return that favor. Because he cares.

Also because it's just fun to give Zack a little grief.]

[soldiernoclass]

[ Somewhere far away Zack is rolling his eyes. ]

Geez, I'm starting to think you really are my mother. If you don't get dirty in the field, you're not doing your job!

[deus_ex_phs]

Please don't tell me you subscribe to the idea that the dirtier you are, the better job you've done.

That would have to be a pretty impressive disguise if I was really your mom, though. Either that, or you just really suck at seeing through disguises.

1/2

[soldiernoclass]

Well, you're not doing that great a job if you come home all clean and shiny.

I mean, unless you're secretly Sephiroth, too.

[soldiernoclass]

...Aw man. I really wish I hadn't given myself that mental image.

[deus_ex_phs]

[Sorry, Zack, Kunsel is laughing at you so hard right now.]

What, you don't think Sephiroth would look good in a dress?

Hang on, you'll need some practice in proper form of address for him now. Repeat after me: Yes sir ma'am!