doots (
doots) wrote in
bakerstreet2014-06-05 09:04 pm
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The Best Friends to More Meme
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There's nothing in this world quite like a true, blue best friend that you can rely on. They've been with you through thick and thin, good and bad. You want to have fun? They're the first person you look for, because they always know how to bring the best out in you. You need a shoulder to cry on? Don't worry, they're already here. You need to bury a body? ...you should probably reconsider your priorities, but you know your best friend will be there with a shovel and a smile. You'd never ruin this friendship for ANYTHING in the world. Something's brewing that may do just that, though. One of you has feelings, has for a long time, and that spells trouble. Unless you keep that to yourself and remain platonic, of course. Repression in this case might be a good thing. Only it's too late. The cat's out of the bag, whether it's by confession or by accident. What to do, what to do? If feelings aren't returned, can you turn down a friend, or will you force something that isn't there just to make them happy? If feelings are returned, will you risk changing the perfect thing you have?
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John Watson | Sherlock
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early series 3 with a nebulous explanation of the prior thread in order to give them a real setting:
Overall, a stupid idea. Really stupid. He needs to be more careful.]
Of course you're not going anywhere. That was never a concern.
[Oh, to hell with it.]
But that doesn't mean you're here, with me.
[He doesn't know how else to describe it: they haven't been in sync.]
it's perfect
The comment from the detective was innocent enough, but still John was surprised. He sighed, his expression softening. Deep down, he couldn't help but feel bad - guilty, even.]
Sherlock... I'm here with you right now, aren't I? [He shrugged his shoulders, trying for a weak smile.] All you have to do is stalk me and I'll be here with you again. Hell, I'm sure Mycroft has been keeping tabs on me, and could tell you where I am at any hour of the day. [The very literal Big Brother he was.]
is present tense okay?
For once, John, [he says, reaching for his phone,] I beg you not to take me so literally.
[Sherlock's fingers brush against John's by accident. For some reason, that causes him to stop and stare at their hands.]
totally!
John instinctively opens his mouth to retort in reply to Sherlock's words.]
Then by all means, Sherlock, explain to me what you're talking about. What am I supposed to say to ...?
[He was going to say 'to make everything better,' but their fingers brushed, and his gaze follows his friend's to their hands. He looks back up at Sherlock, his brow furrowed.]
Sherlock, I... I didn't know.
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Forget it. Forget I said anything.
[Not even Wikipedia's Article of the Day--Persoonia lanceolata, a shrub native to New South Wales--it was relevant in an old case of his--is enough of a distraction.]
I won't ask you to do the impossible for me.
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He blinks in surprise at Sherlock's words, stepping back just a little bit to frown up at him.]
Sherlock, what do you... what are you talking about? [He sighs, his voice quieting, but this time, he actually reaches out to touch Sherlock's hand in an attempt to push the phone away. And he doesn't move his hand right away, because perhaps touch will keep his friend focused... and he doesn't really mind it, to be perfectly honest.] Could you just put the mobile away and look at me for a moment, please?
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I--
[Unable to deny John's request, Sherlock looks him in the eye again.]
I missed you.
[He forges ahead, unwilling to linger on that.]
I've missed two entire years with you.
[He can't figure out if smiling is inappropriate here. Probably.]
If I could, I would spend every waking moment with you. Attempting to make up for it.
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The smiling shouldn't have John smiling too, but he is, just a little bit.]
Sherlock... [He sighs, shaking his head.] You know I missed you, every bloody waking moment you were gone.
You know I forgive you, for what you put me through, right?
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I know, [he says softly.] Not because I deserve to be forgiven, but because your heart is so good.
[He takes the opportunity to pick a bit of lint off of John's coat. His hand lingers again. It keeps doing that; it's annoying.]
There's one more thing I must ask forgiveness for.
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And because I missed you. So much, Sherlock.
[But then he looked back up, leaning closer without really even noticing it, though his hands remained at his sides.]
What's that, then?
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[Every waking moment, Sherlock thinks. He wants it so much, even though it would be impossible for John to provide it. (Also: unhealthy.) (Also: they're too co-dependent as it is.) (John John John his John)
For now, he'll just have to settle for something else. He leans in close, closer, until they're more or less breathing the same air. Their lips are nearly touching when he says,] I took the liberty of appropriating one of your jumpers. [Pause.] For an experiment, of course. Essential to my research. [Another pause. Their noses brush together, definitely affectionate.]
Forgive me?
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Sherlock was so close then, and John knew he could have turned away if he had really wanted to. Surely his friend would have taken the hint. But John... he doesn't really want to move away, not when the familiar scent of his friend is so near, and just so real. Then he says that bit about his jumper, and John can't help but snort quietly, dryly. And then he has to go and touch their noses like that in such a bloody affectionate way. He huffs a little, already feeling his resolve lessen even more.]
Oh, to hell with it.
[And with that, he does squeeze his eyes shut and press their lips together, curiosity and the moment overcoming him.]
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But he smiles a crooked smile and waits for John to reject him (most likely gently) (John wouldn't hurt him like that) (heart is so good). It's freeing, in a sense, to show John how he feels. It might be the first step to getting over himself. He's been stuck on John Watson--mired in him like a tar pit--for longer than he would like to admit. At some point it became an obsession for him; a reason to keep going, to not submit. So, really, John shouldn't reciprocate any of this. John shouldn't even think about kissing him
(John is kissing him)
like this. Like it's not a mistake. Like it's something John feels as well.]
John, [he says quietly, after the kiss, unable to determine how long it persisted. (Endorphins distorting his sense of time???) If there's more he wants to say, he forgets what it is when he kisses John once again.]
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It wasn't like kissing a woman. Sherlock's lips were surprisingly soft, but firmer than a woman's lips, and there was a bit of stubble involved, even if they had both shaved. It was just a pressing of lips together at first, he didn't try to deepen it, until they finally broke away moments later.
John stares in wonder at his friend, and swallows, unsure what to say. He supposes he should feel embarrassed, but he doesn't. It's good that Sherlock kisses him again, before the moment got too awkward. John had kissed taller girls before - he had accepted his shorter height a long time ago - but it still felt strange at first, kissing someone so tall as Sherlock. But the second kiss already felt more natural, and he reached out to grasp the lapels of Sherlock's damned coat, pulling him closer.
That was when John tried to deepen the kiss. Not that he was terribly modest, but he'd had plenty of practice kissing by now.]
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More importantly: where should he put his hands? On John's face? His waist? His shoulders? He's overthinking everything about a simple kiss, but he really can't stop himself. (Wouldn't be Sherlock Holmes if he weren't overthinking the details.) Regardless, he likes the way John clutches at his coat to keep him as close as possible. He also likes the way John wants more from him--insists on getting more, like the commander he can be. Sherlock is all too willing to give John whatever he wants; no questions asked. He'd even give his life to John a second time, a third time, if it were required.
For the sake of practicality, Sherlock settles his wrists on John's shoulders like a familiar lover. It gives him more stability (knees feel a bit weak) (John's fault) as well as free reign to stoke the nape of John's neck. He marvels at how soft John's skin feels in this context. Information to file away for later...
What about Mary? some part of him wants to ask. He doesn't ask that. Even when they next part to breathe (but not too far away), he doesn't ask about John's lovely bride-to-be. Instead, he asks softly,]
Come home with me?
[It has all the meaning John might imagine it having.]
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And when Sherlock put his hands around John's neck, he was acutely aware of how those long fingers stroked his skin. He relaxed into that touch, dipping his tongue into Sherlock's mouth, demanding entrance so he could explore even more. He wanted more, it was never enough with this man. At the moment, the thought of his very real fiance is far from his mind, even though she should be at the forefront. When Sherlock breaks away, even though they need to breathe, he still chases those lips for just a second.
But Sherlock's words reach his hazy mind... and he pauses. Opening his eyes, he looks back into those vivid, piercing eyes he knows so well, and swallows hard. It should be an easy answer - of course he can't go back home with Sherlock, to their old home. He has a new home now, with a woman he planned on marrying... but when he finally opens his mouth to speak, the words come tumbling out before he can stop them. John doesn't really want to stop them, anyway.]
Yes.
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Luring John away from here feels eerily reminiscent of an abduction. Sherlock takes one of John's hands in his own, tight and controlled, unwilling to let go (never going to let go again). He takes a step backward, then one more, until he's sure John will follow him. They're not too far from the flat--or the lives they once led. Returning to 221B, together, means turning back the clock in a sense.
They arrive in record time thanks to Sherlock's temerity to use rooftop shortcuts. He spends too long (exact time unknown) (still) fumbling with the keys to the front door--] Come on-- [then makes up for it once they're inside by kissing John. He has a whole list of things he wants to make up for. Hardly knows where to start.
He does know that once he gets going, it'll be impossible for him to stop.]
Do watch your step, [he murmurs in John's ear, but not to be helpful. Ascending the stairs is more treacherous when Sherlock insists on scenting John's skin. For all that is different, there's so much that hasn't changed. Underneath a layer of (unnecessary) cologne, John still smells the same.]