bakerstreet | texts from last night? must be saturday.

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texts from last night? must be saturday.

*Pick your poison from here or make your own. Or leave it blank.
*Others respond.
*Comedy/awkwardness/sexy ensues.
*????
*PROFIT!

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we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why s/he and I have to fuck in motels.

Filing this under things I didn't need to know about you and Captain Rogers.

we had to tell the lady at the desk the stuff got broken in a training exercise? beginning to think we need code names. also that he should probably wear a mask? ... another mask.

[ Natasha, he is oversharing because of revenge. ]

You have code names.

[ Not her fault you can't hold your booze!! ]

there are coffee mugs with his face on it. i think he needs another one. i'm suffering here.

[ ... Natasha, please. ]

What would it even be?

barton says dick yankee. you mind if i do some rearranging of his face?

Be my guest. And make sure he knows I won't take him to the hospital. He won't learn anything if I do.

kid's gotta stand on his own two feet at some point. i'll make sure he gets the message.

This is why we're friends.

you mean beyond the mutual stockholm syndrome?

No that's why we STAY friends.

our relationship is so healthy

Still healthier than Coulson's hero worship.

i never know if i should be pissed @ that.

He's harmless.

Uh, thanks for sharing. Sounds expensive!

who is this?

You texted me, did you check the number before you called?

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