bakerstreet | is it hot in here or is the floor LAVA

Just share the damn bed with me.

For whatever reason, the floor is an unacceptable place to sleep. It's messy, the dog is there, THE FLOOR IS LAVA, there's flooding, feels weird, or it's too dirty to walk on. Who cares why it's not acceptable, it just isn't! Normally, that's not an issue, but tonight you have a friend over. Maybe it's the safest place, maybe it's hurricane season and your house is the only one out of the path of the storm. Are they mooching off you? Stop trying to figure out the details! Just get over it and share the bed with that person! Sexy times are not required. Intimacy is not required. Just share the damn bed already.

Do you need options? DO YOU? Here! Have some options!

1. It's late. You're tired. Too tired to drive and THE FLOOR IS LAVA.
2. It's late. You're drunk. Too drunk. Honestly, how did you drink that much and not die? Should we take you to the hospital? Here, just stay in this bed with me. No, you can't sleep on the floor. THE FLOOR IS LAVA.
3. It's early. You thought you'd just come by and visit but you can barely function. The bed seems inviting. Guess what, you're invited into the bed! Yes. The bed. Not the floor. THE FLOOR IS LAVA.
4. DO YOU LIKE TO CUDDLE? CUDDLING IS OKAY. And yes, the floor is lava.
5. WILDCARD. Just figure out a reason why you need to share the bed. But don't forget: the floor is lava!
6. The Crack Fun Insane Option - Actually play the Floor is Lava Game!! Move about the room without touching the floor... because the floor is seriously lava.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[m/f for shipping, no smut.]

[ Hi again! Feel like throwing these two into this special brand of hell? ]

[Sorry, I meant to respond to this sooner! But yeah, sure! Maybe they're 2 tired from training, or possibly the prompt where the floor is actually lava? Or if you have something else in mind!]

[They had arrived from their latest mission just eighteen hours ago. Long enough to recuperate from a four-day journey, yeah? Considering their sleep was kept light and their spirits were high, and (miraculously) the training grounds were off-limits to them for the day. Gai-sensei had gone to fight whichever numbskull had come up with that decision for them, but it didn't change the fact that the remaining trio was still buzzing (remember that high mentioned earlier?) come noon, no matter how hard they tried (or didn't) to disguise it. So maybe training wasn't a bad idea after all, but where? Tenten had slid a sly look Neji's way. Neji had weighed the pros and the cons.

And then the team had found themselves blowing off steam (they were running on empty- where the hell had that energy come from?) in the Hyuga's main courtyard. They got a stray odd glance now and then, but bringing in friends wasn't against any rules. And besides, nothing was being obscenely damaged. Neji had laid down that law himself. They had skipped lunch in favor of one last round of shooting kunai at that poor lone tree. By 7, they all remarked it was getting late (and maybe they were finally starting to let the exhaustion set in, with the hunger not helping) and Tenten had excused herself to go home. Alright. The boys would wrap things up soon enough, too.

Then those large, heavy doors of the Hyuga estate began to swing closed.

What? It's not late enough for curfew, and besides-

One man decided to take pity on the confused faces (and he was amused as hell, too) and explained. There was somebody important from the Sand coming tonight- the head of the house was getting ready. Didn't they ever stop to think why the courtyard had been tidier than usual today?

Had been. And will be again. It prompted one last-ditch, all-out, panicked surge of strength and speed to get every grain of sand back where it should be, every broken twig out of sight, every dropped tool back in a bag, and every abused mark on that tree-- hell, well there's nothing they can do about that. Not bothering to settle down, Neji's next task, he thinks, is simple. He unceremoniously shoves at his teammate's back (why is your shirt so damp that's so gross) and all but bulldozes the guy past the main buildings of the estate. Into a hall. Sharp right here. Quit breathing so loud, Rock. They have to be quiet. That magical, magical word.]

Why couldn't you have left when Tenten did? [It's harshly accusing, but he hadn't been complaining when Lee had helped with the clean-up.] And why do you have to sweat so much? [Spoiler alert: they're not even in his room yet. They're in the same wing. Neji's pretty sure his legs will give out on him twelve steps from now.

So close.

So far away.

So sweaty.

Why, god, why?]

[Through every step of this process, Rock Lee remained as eager and excited as could be. He was even delighted to be pushed through the halls of Hyuuga manor by Neji - it felt like a friendship exercise. And he had worked so hard, that he was indeed a sweaty creature, his bowlcut more like a soggy mop.

He let out a light chuckle and grinned smugly as he addressed Neji's question.]

Neji, the answer to both questions is simple... because there was hard work to be done! [At least he's whispering. ...If a very loud-sounding whisper.] I am very proud of today's performance. I think that we are both stronger than the us of yesterday!

[In an attempt to wipe that irritating grin off Lee's face, Neji thinks he should point out that if getting stronger was the end goal _{(when... was it not....)}, then he should have left the courtyard as is and only called Lee to take his place in grounds maintenance duty for what would no doubt be the rest of the year.

Lee would probably only grin harder, though.] I don't care about getting stronger right now. I want to rest and we need to get to my room first.

[Because they're stinking up the hall with their youth. Neji gestures to the stairs ahead.] I'm not hauling you up the stairs. ...Don't make a racket on your way up. [Not "follow me" because h a h a he can't feel his legs. Or his arms. Hope you can support yourself Lee, he's letting you go.]

Ah... Yes, rest is important too... [But it is an afterthought to getting stronger in the end. And yes, Lee would only grin harder.]

I will be as quiet and careful as I can! [Lee stumbles slightly as he's released, but he manages to grab onto the railings. Even though most levels of fatigue are relatively manageable for him when he hasn't opened any Gates, he has been awake for a long time and it may already be passing his usual bedtime. So his movements are slowed as he tries to lightly jog up the stairs.]

[But why jog... or else, why question what Lee does when Neji already knows he won't get a pleasing answer.] Just wait for me when you reach the top. [Yep, still trailing behind like the old man he is. And then, when that hideous obstacle is over with-] You do understand you'll be spending the night?

[It's the last room to the left, which is just fine with Neji because it means no unnecessary everyday noises to bother him. He slips the key in and (gods he'll regret this) invites Lee in.]

[Good choice, Neji.]

Of course, Neji! [More loud whispers.] I would wait until the end of my days for you if I had to!

[And he nods along as Neji raises that point.]

That is very interesting to hear! I will be very honored to spend the night at such a prestigious place, Neji! [And so he eagerly comes into the room as it is unlocked!]

[I see we're throwing shade.

Stupid Lee, he's not that slow. Because why ever read that as a wonderfully touching sentiment among friends.] When I said to keep your voice down, I didn't mean you had to talk like that. [But telling Lee not to whisper might prompt the opposite of a whisper which would be... Please no.] Just don't scream and we should be fine.

[By 'we' he means 'you' but. Semantics. Which is what makes Neji snort softly as he stepped aside and closed the door behind him. 'Prestigious'. It was true- not many people in the village had ever even entered the gates of the compound, much less been sneaked so far inside. But his room, to him, didn't feel quite so illustrious. There's mostly-full bookshelves, sitting cushions, and just enough furniture to get by-- meaning, a clothes drawer. There's a table there somewhere. With a lamp. And a bed. Bored yet? There's a dumb little team photo among one of the bookshelves and a lone kunai knife over the drawer. Excuse the mess.]

Catch.

[Coming back from a side room -oh right, there's a bathroom- Neji tosses a clean towel Lee's way. He won't have his room reeking.] I thought this would be easier than having to cross the courtyard again, when arrangements are being put in place and people will be coming and going. [Ah-] You'll be sleeping on my bed. ...but cool down a little, first.

is it hot in here or is the floor LAVA

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