monkeytailed: (Whoa whoa wait hold on.)
Zidane Tribal ([personal profile] monkeytailed) wrote in [community profile] bakerstreet2012-02-10 06:08 pm

THE ADVICE COLUMN MEME

THE ADVICE COLUMN MEME
For all of your fictional dilemma advice needs.


It's an advice column meme! Write letters and have the helpful Aunt Lu write back with fantastic advice which will offer insight and guide you on your way.

  • Post with a letter. You know, something like...

    Dear Auntie Lu,

    I recently moved to a new city and whoever's running this place really doesn't like giving out pants. It's skintight catsuits or nothing. What's the etiquette behind asking the omnipresent overlords if they could spare some more normal clothing?

    Pantsless And Not Thrilled


    (Despite using accounts assume that everyone's anonymous unless they specify otherwise. Alright? Alright.)


  • Respond to other people's letters! (If you need IC justification, you just got hired on as one among many faceless minions of Auntie Lu churning out responses to increasingly inane letters.)

    Dear PANT,

    You should be firm, but polite, in telling them that you would appreciate pants. However, you should be sensitive to cultural differences. Perhaps catsuits are the normal and appropriate for your new city? When in Rome...

    Auntie Lu


    (The above about 'assume we're all anon unless we don't wanna be' qualifies here too.)


  • If you want to do other things like have George realize that Jack wrote the letter about catsuits and he brings it up later when they go out for Thai...go for it.


  • And have fun!
findmyownreason: (Default)

[personal profile] findmyownreason 2012-02-11 10:21 pm (UTC)(link)
dear auntie lu

someone told me there's a day coming up you're supposed to give a gift to someone you care about.






what do I give?

signed,
sidequest here I come
edgar_roni: (in bed)

[personal profile] edgar_roni 2012-02-11 10:40 pm (UTC)(link)
Sidequest,

Vodka and black underwear.

Regards,
Auntie Lu
findmyownreason: (fenrir spells freedom)

[personal profile] findmyownreason 2012-02-12 04:27 pm (UTC)(link)
dear lu,

I have too much self preservation to guess at her bra size. And I already bring her vodka. Every Wednesday.

sincerely,
i like black
edgar_roni: (a modern flair)

[personal profile] edgar_roni 2012-02-13 09:40 am (UTC)(link)
I Like Black,

Lingerie.

Kind of Envious,
Auntie Lu
findmyownreason: (Default)

[personal profile] findmyownreason 2012-02-13 04:32 pm (UTC)(link)
dear you don't know the half of it,

I'm going to get in trouble for this, aren't I?

sincerely,
might be worth it
edgar_roni: (amano style 2)

[personal profile] edgar_roni 2012-02-13 07:57 pm (UTC)(link)
Might be Worth It,

The good kind of trouble. Trust me. I will never lead you astray.


Definitely Worth It,
Auntie Lu
findmyownreason: (Default)

[personal profile] findmyownreason 2012-02-28 03:59 pm (UTC)(link)
dear lu,

right.






I'm going to try it anyway.

sincerely,
luckily she's very forgiving
findmyownreason: (caught in the light)

[personal profile] findmyownreason 2012-02-12 04:30 pm (UTC)(link)
dear AL

she might like an airship cruise. I can do that as long as I stay busy. But she's already got earrings and a ring. a necklace would get lost Is there something other than regular jewelry I could do instead?

sincerely,
bribes with tea
Edited 2012-02-12 17:03 (UTC)
inthenameofthemoon: ([usagi] --that's funny!)

[personal profile] inthenameofthemoon 2012-02-11 11:49 pm (UTC)(link)
Dear Sidequest,

Oh! I know what day you're talking about! That's Valentine's Day!

....hrm. What to get someone special... most people go for flowers and chocolate, but this is a day for love! You should get something special that really shows you care.

Is there anything they like? Like do they cook or do they like gardening? If you get a gift that shows you really put your heart in it, the person you're giving a gift to will love it!

Wishing you luck,
AL!
findmyownreason: (Default)

[personal profile] findmyownreason 2012-02-12 04:33 pm (UTC)(link)
dear AL,

I - guess so? What's a valentine and why does it have a day that involves guys getting themselves in trouble with their partners?

...

I could... buy her a set of brass knuckles?

sincerely,
hoping for dinner that's not cold on valentine's day
inthenameofthemoon: (stupefied .)

[personal profile] inthenameofthemoon 2012-02-13 12:41 am (UTC)(link)
Dear you'll get a hot meal, I'm sure of it!

Guys wouldn't get in trouble if they actually put thought into their gifts! Valentine's Day is to make the one you care about feel special. I mean really special. Lots of people get super hyped up for it! Which is why you have to be really careful when giving gifts!

Brass Knuckles? ... Is.. your special someone a fighter? -- Wait no! That's not an appropriate gift at all! Unless she really likes fighting... does she?

Always willing to help,
AL!
findmyownreason: (behold the power of the puppy eyes)

[personal profile] findmyownreason 2012-02-13 04:35 pm (UTC)(link)
dear al!

It sounds like a trap.

I don't know that I'd say she likes to fight, she's just very good at it. She's good at cooking too. Should I get her a set of pots instead?

sincerely,
sinking feeling
inthenameofthemoon: ([usagi] that's what she said!)

[personal profile] inthenameofthemoon 2012-02-14 08:21 am (UTC)(link)
Dear look on the bright side!

A trap? Of course not! That's a silly thought!

... Okay okay, let's try a different way to show how much you appreciate her. Instead of getting her something, did you ever think about doing things for her? Like making her breakfast in bed or treating her to a spa day or something?

Girls like being pampered!

Hoping this helps,
AL.
findmyownreason: (Default)

sorry for the late - work and sick

[personal profile] findmyownreason 2012-02-28 03:54 pm (UTC)(link)
dear al,

...

I'm not allowed near the kitchen anymore. The only spa I know of is run by middle-aged body builders. Would it be okay to get a pizza delivered instead?

sincerely,
who invented this day anyway?
tasercopter: (have to eat them all in just one sitting)

[personal profile] tasercopter 2012-02-12 09:48 am (UTC)(link)
Dear Sucker,

You might want to develop a brain so you can pick something out yourself.

Do you believe everything people tell you?

Yours,
Concerned
findmyownreason: (watchu talkin bout?)

[personal profile] findmyownreason 2012-02-12 04:34 pm (UTC)(link)
dear concerned you don't sound like it

girls are strange.

sincerely,
blaming everything that goes wrong on you
tasercopter: (a lesson in tightropes)

[personal profile] tasercopter 2012-02-13 12:53 pm (UTC)(link)
Dear You should blame yourself,

You're never gonna get anywhere with that kind of attitude. You're the strange one.

Best presents for girls: liquor, explosives, high performance vehicles.

Yours,
Someone awesome you wish you could be as awesome as
findmyownreason: (Im an only child dammit!)

[personal profile] findmyownreason 2012-02-13 04:38 pm (UTC)(link)
dear you sound suspiciously familiar

I thought we weren't supposed to blow things up anymore.


sincerely
she has her own liquor
tasercopter: (retaining mystique)

[personal profile] tasercopter 2012-02-13 04:49 pm (UTC)(link)
Dear you're imagining things,

Now you can't even do basic math, because if you take away liquor and explosives, that leaves high performance vehicles.

Problem: solved.

You're Welcome,
Some brilliant person you don't know