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1. It began the way the best stories do — with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.2. I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.3. He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothed, watching Bring It On, and eating chips and salsa.4. Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.5. You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.6. Is this a drinking picnic?