0dayssincelastaccident: (i prefer dark craft beers)

Matt the Radar Technician | Star Wars/SNL

[personal profile] 0dayssincelastaccident 2016-02-19 10:44 pm (UTC)(link)
1. so two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.

2. who turned off the TV in the cafeteria? they were showing the latest pod-races, i was watching that, THANK YOU VERY MUCH

3. current emotional status: alderaan

4. what is a calcinator? seriously please tell me this lady is giving me a bad look and i don't like it.
0dayssincelastaccident: (ewoks are traitors)

[personal profile] 0dayssincelastaccident 2016-02-20 12:38 am (UTC)(link)
no, pod races are the best. you just don't understand. it takes real jedi reflexes to race pods.
sensitively: (glaring)

[personal profile] sensitively 2016-02-20 12:41 am (UTC)(link)
That's not even true. Any idiot can race pods; Jedi wouldn't be bothered with such annoyances. Any one that does is just wasting their potential.
0dayssincelastaccident: (i wish i'd suffered more)

[personal profile] 0dayssincelastaccident 2016-02-20 01:08 am (UTC)(link)
excuse me, darth vader used to race pods. he was awesome at it. pod racing is a real sport and you just don't know any better.
girlandherstaff: (Default)

4

[personal profile] girlandherstaff 2016-02-20 02:31 pm (UTC)(link)
A radar technician who doesn't know what a calcinator is? ... How did you even pass training?
0dayssincelastaccident: (who's ben)

[personal profile] 0dayssincelastaccident 2016-02-20 09:00 pm (UTC)(link)
[you don't see him but he's sweating up a storm over here HIS (NOT RADAR TECHNICIAN) TRAINING DIDN'T PREPARE HIM FOR THIS]

it's been a while since my training, okay? a while. besides i haven't used them all that often? so it isn't my fault.

just tell me, she keeps glaring at me and i want her to stop
girlandherstaff: (staff)

[personal profile] girlandherstaff 2016-02-20 09:06 pm (UTC)(link)
I don't know the technical terms for it, but it helps to produce the energy for the mains. You likely need to replace it because it'll be almost done?
0dayssincelastaccident: (ewoks are traitors)

[personal profile] 0dayssincelastaccident 2016-02-20 09:11 pm (UTC)(link)
okay i think i understand that. energy source. got it.

[there is a very long pause before the next text comes in]

what does it look like?
girlandherstaff: (weapon)

[personal profile] girlandherstaff 2016-02-20 09:15 pm (UTC)(link)
... Like a calcinator? Um, tube like? Hang on

[A picture comes through of a calcinator]
0dayssincelastaccident: (fight club is a great movie)

[personal profile] 0dayssincelastaccident 2016-02-20 09:21 pm (UTC)(link)
[Oh, look at that, it's...what he completely didn't notice for the last 10 minutes. Okay, he's got this. It takes another moment for him to reply.]

thanks, i guess. she's not glaring at me anymore so that's good.

i hope i never have to see another calcinator again.
girlandherstaff: (resignation)

[personal profile] girlandherstaff 2016-02-20 09:27 pm (UTC)(link)
...Replacing them is like, every day in that job. Ho... How did you actually make it through training, seriously?
0dayssincelastaccident: (who's ben)

[personal profile] 0dayssincelastaccident 2016-02-20 09:33 pm (UTC)(link)
[It's time to use a well-honored trick of the Dark Side of the Force: BLUFFING AS HARD AS ONE CAN BLUFF. (Okay, maybe that's just his own trick.)]

i've seen them too many times which is why i'm complaining. day in and day out. so many calcinators.

and i did my training like everyone else. how could i be a radar technician if i didn't go through training?
girlandherstaff: (amazement)

[personal profile] girlandherstaff 2016-02-20 09:36 pm (UTC)(link)
So if you see so many of them, why did you need to know what one looked like? Matt, you are not good at this job. Maybe you should re-train?
0dayssincelastaccident: (i prefer dark craft beers)

[personal profile] 0dayssincelastaccident 2016-02-20 09:47 pm (UTC)(link)
[....whoops.]

no i don't need training! and i'm good at this, i fix radars all the time, okay, like i can probably do it in my sleep while blindfolded.

i just need to change my glasses probably

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firstorders: tweaked by <user name=firstorders> (The stick is firmly lodged in place)

2

[personal profile] firstorders 2016-02-20 09:00 pm (UTC)(link)
Perhaps you should be concentrating on doing your job instead of some ridiculous pod race you can watch when you're off duty?
0dayssincelastaccident: (i believe in absolutes)

[personal profile] 0dayssincelastaccident 2016-02-20 09:02 pm (UTC)(link)
[urge to snark back at hux because it's hux and he's always annoying: high]

well all of the radars are fixed. so there. i have the free time to watch it, don't judge me.

[currently the radar in sector 4 is catching on fire after he did "work" on it but shhhhh no one needs to know that]
firstorders: tweaked by <user name=firstorders> (Grumpy bear)

[personal profile] firstorders 2016-02-20 09:13 pm (UTC)(link)
That is NOT how this works. You are being paid to render services to the First Order and you are sitting on your arse.

[Did Hux know who he was talking to? It was debatable.]

As for performing your duties, I've just been informed the array you just serviced is currently in fire. So you're not only lazy, you are incompetent.
0dayssincelastaccident: (i relate to holden caulfield)

[personal profile] 0dayssincelastaccident 2016-02-20 09:16 pm (UTC)(link)
[urge to crush his own phone with his bare hands: ALSO HIGH]

[It takes a moment for him to answer, his hands are trembling too hard.]


well your FACE is incompetent

and i can do what i like. maybe the fire is supposed to be there. are YOU a radar technician? no? i didn't think so
firstorders: tweaked by <user name=firstorders> (The stick is firmly lodged in place)

[personal profile] firstorders 2016-02-20 09:36 pm (UTC)(link)
That didn't even make any sense. You really are hapless and incompetent.

[If Hux knew who he was addressing, no doubt he was getting a nasty kick out of needling Kylo Ren when he couldn't lash back out at him without blowing his cover.]

I don't need to be a radar technician to know that FIRE AND DELICATE ELECTRONICS don't mix. I think the better question here is are YOU a certified radar technician? But I will settle for you getting off your arse and going to fix what you have messed up.
0dayssincelastaccident: (i wish i'd suffered more)

[personal profile] 0dayssincelastaccident 2016-02-20 09:44 pm (UTC)(link)
[Hux, he swears to all that is good and Darth Vader that he will find you and chuck his phone in your smug face.]

shut up you don't know my life

and yes i am. i'm more certified than you'll ever be. and fine maybe i WILL fix it. i'll at least be doing my job unlike SOME people who stand around and just complain all the time about everything
firstorders: tweaked by <user name=firstorders> (The stick is firmly lodged in place)

[personal profile] firstorders 2016-02-20 09:55 pm (UTC)(link)
I should hope you are capable of fixing it considering it is your job to do so. And the fact that our early alert systems are integral to protecting this base and it's inhabitants, of which you count yourself to be.
0dayssincelastaccident: (i believe in absolutes)

[personal profile] 0dayssincelastaccident 2016-02-20 10:36 pm (UTC)(link)
whatever we have like one hundred radars in this place i'm sure losing one won't be a big deal.

plus we can just send out kylo ren to deal with whoever is brave enough to attack us. i mean have you seen that guy? he's awesome.
Edited (i can spell) 2016-02-20 22:39 (UTC)
firstorders: tweaked by <user name=firstorders> (Default)

[personal profile] firstorders 2016-02-20 10:57 pm (UTC)(link)
And the difference between defeat and winning can come down to one piece zof equipment. Truthfully, your rather cavalier attitude towards your duties worries me.

Yes, I have had the displeasure of knowing Kylo Ren. And even he cannot beat the gathered might of the Republic fleet.
0dayssincelastaccident: (ewoks are traitors)

[personal profile] 0dayssincelastaccident 2016-02-20 11:33 pm (UTC)(link)
sure it can.

how do you know? maybe he can. you're probably just jealous he's more powerful you could ever hope to be.

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1/2 i'm sorry

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2/2

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