terriblyy: (pic#7837087)
steinbeck y'all. ([personal profile] terriblyy) wrote in [community profile] bakerstreet2015-12-25 03:25 pm

tfln.



TEXTS FROM LAST NIGHT.
you know the deal.
hux: (Default)

general hux | star wars

[personal profile] hux 2015-12-25 10:59 pm (UTC)(link)
1. just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.

2. Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.

3. I tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."

4. I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn.
darthvaderfanboy: (Knights of Ren)

2

[personal profile] darthvaderfanboy 2015-12-25 11:27 pm (UTC)(link)
I have no idea. It might be because you're the one who's supposed to RUNNING this ship?
hux: (pic#9830455)

[personal profile] hux 2015-12-25 11:29 pm (UTC)(link)
You try running this ship on roughly three hours of sleep a day, every day, for months and tell me you can keep your shit together.
darthvaderfanboy: (Default)

[personal profile] darthvaderfanboy 2015-12-25 11:38 pm (UTC)(link)
Your weaknesses don't concern me. Deal with the problem or Snoke will find someone more competent to replace you.
hux: (Default)

[personal profile] hux 2015-12-25 11:40 pm (UTC)(link)
Don't test my patience, Ren, or I'll be sure to send Snoke the bill for your last temper tantrum.

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hux: (Default)

[personal profile] hux 2015-12-26 03:59 am (UTC)(link)
i'm certain it's dead and doesn't require touching.
hux: (pic#9828471)

[personal profile] hux 2015-12-26 04:20 am (UTC)(link)
that could have been me. better it was the duck. technically it's not murder either, ren.
ragingstrife: (in shadows)

[personal profile] ragingstrife 2015-12-26 04:31 am (UTC)(link)
.... How did you climb the ranks to general again?

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xwingpoetry: (Default)

4.

[personal profile] xwingpoetry 2015-12-26 04:18 am (UTC)(link)
I'm sorry, just imagining you in that position is really funny. Give me a second to stop laughing here.
hux: (pic#9828471)

[personal profile] hux 2015-12-26 04:19 am (UTC)(link)
Stop imagining me!
fulfils: (look into my eyes)

4

[personal profile] fulfils 2015-12-26 08:30 am (UTC)(link)
I'm sure medical can give you something for that, general.

and perhaps next time you'd prefer something nice, slow, and gentle.
hux: (pic#9828471)

[personal profile] hux 2015-12-26 10:50 am (UTC)(link)
Of course because going to medical for that won't start a host of rumours.

[Actually looks around before writing the rest.]

I didn't say that.
fulfils: (so srs)

[personal profile] fulfils 2015-12-26 08:02 pm (UTC)(link)
rumours, of course. it would be terrible if the stormtroopers learned how easily your skin breaks and bruises, wouldn't it
hux: (pic#9836451)

[personal profile] hux 2015-12-26 08:06 pm (UTC)(link)
such terrible rumors, a shame if such things were to go around. they might hear how easy it is to get you on your knees.

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girlandherstaff: (Default)

1

[personal profile] girlandherstaff 2015-12-26 08:11 pm (UTC)(link)
Congratulations, you just killed an innocent animal. How do you feel?
hux: (Default)

[personal profile] hux 2015-12-26 08:13 pm (UTC)(link)
Indifferent. Though I never said it was dead.
girlandherstaff: (looking)

[personal profile] girlandherstaff 2015-12-26 08:33 pm (UTC)(link)
It's not moved in 20 minutes. Is it breathing?
hux: (pic#9828471)

[personal profile] hux 2015-12-26 08:34 pm (UTC)(link)
Possibly. Don't expect me to go over and touch it, it's probably infested with something.

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courageandtenacity: (reject the system dictating its norms)

3

[personal profile] courageandtenacity 2015-12-27 02:27 am (UTC)(link)
I would be indebted if you would ensure I never drink that much again.
hux: (pic#9828471)

scree

[personal profile] hux 2015-12-27 02:29 am (UTC)(link)
I think it's safer for everyone that you never drink that much again. Do you even remember that part of the night?
courageandtenacity: (the law of the land)

SHE'S SUPER NEW MUSE AND I'M TRYING TO SEE HOW STRONG SHE IS /o\

[personal profile] courageandtenacity 2015-12-27 02:34 am (UTC)(link)



The last thing I remember is Kylo Ren insisting it would boost the troop's morale if I took off my helmet.

[if he force-mind-tricked her she's going to kick his ass except that may have been his plan all along. shit.]
hux: (pic#9828471)

SHE CAN STAY ♥

[personal profile] hux 2015-12-27 02:37 am (UTC)(link)
It certain dispelled a few rumors when you took that helmet off, captain.

[Though for better or worse only time would tell.]

Why am I not surprised it was Ren?

ahaha she is pretty amazing.

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best troop mom

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"CHILDREN."

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"Ren started it"

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phasma's life is suffering.

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