ldfsh: (Default)
lead fish ([personal profile] ldfsh) wrote in [community profile] bakerstreet2015-08-07 02:05 pm
agentxthirteen: (05: what's going on?)

c

[personal profile] agentxthirteen 2015-08-07 07:51 pm (UTC)(link)
What the hell? Why are you telling me this?

Do they know what they're bidding on?
spideyguy: (SM Crouch)

[personal profile] spideyguy 2015-08-07 07:53 pm (UTC)(link)
you keep a file on me and i thought it was pertinent information

no its like an ebay thing with blurry pics of spidermans crotch????
agentxthirteen: (04: what the fuck is going on)

[personal profile] agentxthirteen 2015-08-07 08:02 pm (UTC)(link)
... okay I can see why you might think that. This definitely affects your psych eval. Masochist. I'll make a note. How much are you charging?
spideyguy: (Woah)

[personal profile] spideyguy 2015-08-07 08:07 pm (UTC)(link)
i had a psych eval?? excuse u, i am not the one SELLLING

but apparently the bidding is up to 2.5k
agentxthirteen: (04: we deserve to know)

[personal profile] agentxthirteen 2015-08-07 08:25 pm (UTC)(link)
Did you really not know? You're a guy running around the city with a onesie and a spider fetish. Of course we did a psych eval on you.

... Dare you to bid.

How is the seller even going to get your crotch? Do you know who the seller is?
spideyguy: (SM Hanging)

[personal profile] spideyguy 2015-08-07 08:27 pm (UTC)(link)
dont i have to be present for something like that??

1) i do not have that kind of money 2) im pretty sure thats like super vain or s/t

no idea to either of those. but for once im mildly afraid
agentxthirteen: (05: i won't let that happen)

[personal profile] agentxthirteen 2015-08-07 08:33 pm (UTC)(link)
If you're an amateur, sure.

1/2) Guess I won't loan it to you then. Or add "vain" to your psych eval. Defeated again.

I'll start looking into who it is. If you haven't already, you'd better put a cup in that onesie.
spideyguy: (SM Crawl)

[personal profile] spideyguy 2015-08-07 08:36 pm (UTC)(link)
ruDE

god BLESS *_* a cup wouldnt work with the way i have to contort my body
agentxthirteen: (05: alarmed)

[personal profile] agentxthirteen 2015-08-07 08:39 pm (UTC)(link)
Have you ever met someone at a government agency who was polite?

And... and I'm just going to delete that statement from my brain.
spideyguy: (SM Closeup)

[personal profile] spideyguy 2015-08-07 08:44 pm (UTC)(link)
i never actually bothered getting my driver's license, so idk. is that what the kids are calling shield nowadays?

backflip + half cartwheel while rotating counterclockwise in midair downtown new york. how they even managed to zoom in on my crotch is a mystery
agentxthirteen: (04: something smells like Denmark)

[personal profile] agentxthirteen 2015-08-07 08:50 pm (UTC)(link)
One of the nicer things we've been called.

AND DON'T DO THE MENTAL IMAGE THING. Jesus. Can you pick out any clues from the picture of where and when it was taken?
spideyguy: (Can't Look!)

[personal profile] spideyguy 2015-08-07 08:53 pm (UTC)(link)
i cant control your mental images. if you're seeing my crotch in slow motion in your own head, that's your business

1/4 not sure, that looks like it could be brooklyn

2/4 no queens

3/4 definitely brooklyn

4/4 there's fire everywhere
agentxthirteen: (05: i won't let that happen)

[personal profile] agentxthirteen 2015-08-08 04:16 am (UTC)(link)
1/3 WHY DO YOU KEEP SAYING THESE THINGS.

2/3 Send me a link. I'll check to see if the pics are geotagged.

3/3 NM. Found a link on twitter. The auction has officially hit the news cycle.
spideyguy: (Science)

[personal profile] spideyguy 2015-08-08 04:22 am (UTC)(link)
1/2 say WHAT. You're the one thinking about my diCK

2/2 OH COME ON GOD DAMMIT
agentxthirteen: (01: he's REALLY bad at flirting)

[personal profile] agentxthirteen 2015-08-08 04:26 am (UTC)(link)
1/2 Because you keep talking about it!

2/3 Bidding's going up. Definitely wear some protection. Maybe take some time off.
spideyguy: (SM Hanging)

[personal profile] spideyguy 2015-08-08 04:30 am (UTC)(link)
1/2 and yet you're the one who keeps imagining it

2/2 oh god what is it up to now?
agentxthirteen: (01: the things i can't say)

[personal profile] agentxthirteen 2015-08-08 04:39 am (UTC)(link)
1/2 We're officially done talking about your junk

2/2 51k. wait. 51500. Congratulations?
spideyguy: (Woah)

[personal profile] spideyguy 2015-08-08 04:53 am (UTC)(link)
1/3 okay you can text me when you're off duty

2/3 WHAT

3/3 WHAT DO THEY THINK THEY'RE BUYING
agentxthirteen: (04: rogers isn't a fugitive)

[personal profile] agentxthirteen 2015-08-08 09:01 pm (UTC)(link)
1/2 We aren't friends, Parker. Once I'm off-duty, we text in emergency situations only.

2/2 YOUR JUNK, PARKER. HAVE YOU NOT BEEN PAYING ATTENTION
spideyguy: (Can't Look!)

[personal profile] spideyguy 2015-08-08 09:05 pm (UTC)(link)
1/2 friends dont think about other friend's genitals

2/2 but like??? IS IT SUPPOSED TO BE ON OR OFF MY BODY WHEN THEY GET IT??
agentxthirteen: (04: no fucking way)

[personal profile] agentxthirteen 2015-08-08 09:20 pm (UTC)(link)
1/2 If we were really friends, you wouldn't have talked so much about your genitals.

2/2 DO I SEEM LIKE I KNOW? this is why I suggested taking some time off! Or wearing protection!
spideyguy: (SM Hanging)

[personal profile] spideyguy 2015-08-08 09:24 pm (UTC)(link)
1/2 apparently they're primetime news!

2/2 if i knew i would sell for this much i would have sold my body sooner fuck college
agentxthirteen: (04: something smells hella rotten)

[personal profile] agentxthirteen 2015-08-08 09:28 pm (UTC)(link)
1/2 Want me to dig up the ratings for the news programs and see if they rise or fall?

2/2 Are you only just finding out about prostitution/sugar daddies? I thought you were a genius.
spideyguy: (Ceiling)

[personal profile] spideyguy 2015-08-08 09:39 pm (UTC)(link)
no one goes for the skinny nerd bait! and no i think ive had enough confidence-destruction for one day
agentxthirteen: (01: buh-bye)

[personal profile] agentxthirteen 2015-08-08 11:34 pm (UTC)(link)
Garry just told me the FCC is getting complaints.

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